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Hi all,
DC is in middle school and has an IEP due to specific LDs and ADHD. One thing we continue to struggle with is whether to hire tutors to help with the specific LDs. It's the school system's responsibility to provide special education services and we feel, in part, that hiring tutors is letting them off the hook. The other thing we struggle with is the time factor - we both work (but have flexibility in our schedules) but wonder how DC is supposed to fit in enough tutoring to make a difference, plus do homework, plus have down time/time to pursue activities in which DC has pretty significant talents and enjoys. DC did have a tutor for one subject in elementary school (taught by a special ed teacher) but it really did not seem to make a difference. Despite doing our share of research etc., we feel that we've spent money on stuff that has made very little difference. Thoughts from those who've "been there, done that"? |
In what subject areas does your DC need help? What are the weaknesses? Are you documenting the amount of time and money you are providing tutoring? Each time a tutor meets with your child he/she should document how long was spent, what was taught and how much it cost. Present this at the IEP meeting as evidence that your child is getting extensive support outside of school, and ask to have the in school hours upped. |
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OP, not sure where you are geographically, but FCPS Resource Center publishes a list of tutors, all of whom are FCPS teachers. We have previously used a Chemistry tutor from the list and he was really good.
http://www.fcps.edu/cco/prc/resources/documents/PRCTutorListSeptember2014.pdf |
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My dd has ADHD, and she was below grade level in reading. The school provided support, but we also hired a tutor. We initially hired a tutor who was a teacher at the school, but that did not work well for us. In our IEP meetings, the tutor/teacher did not seem like she was on "our" side. We felt ganged up on having her seeming to attribute dd's being behind in reading to that being our fault.
We ended up changing and using a tutor from the Lab School. I really like her. She has experience with special needs, and she is definitely on our side. She wrote up a great summary of her work with dd for our IEP meeting. http://www.labschool.org/page/Services/Tutoring |
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OP,
Services from schools are meant to meet the minimum legal requirements, not ensure your kid succeeds. You'll probably have to shell out for a tutor. |
I'm sorry to say that I'm finding this to be true as well. I've also found they're willing to pass the child along and let the middle/high school teachers deal with remediating it. Wouldn't it be so much easier on everyone if you intensified efforts in elementary so the kid would be at grade level in middle/high school? I learned the answer is 'no'. |
I completely agree with this and poster who said IEPs are established for the minimums. We started DS in a private school known for its help with special needs kids. DC was still overwhelmed with homework. They were well aware that DS was exhausted from too much homework and that we had outside tutors. We decided to go mainstream in FCPS with an IEP and redirect all the money we spent on private school into tutoring. So, yes DS had an IEP but private tutoring almost ever afternoon. It was the only way we could get through high school. That's not the way the system should work but, depending on your child's need, that may be what you have to do to provide the necessary supports. Each child is different. Ours had severe exec. functioning problems, ADHD, anxiety and HFA. Good luck! I disagree with the poster who said document the hours and show them at the next IEP meeting. FCPS won't care. They view their role as acting as gatekeeper to ADA and IDEA services, not as suppliers and helpers of the children. That's why I bolded the sentence above. You must be your child's advocate and work within a broken system. |
You can look at hiring a tutor as letting the school system off the hook, or, you can look at it as doing your best for your child regardless of what the school does or does not do. You can certainly push for more services, but meanwhile, your DC is getting older, perhaps becoming more frustrated, and the gap between age-appropriate and his/her skills continues to grow. Tutors who know what they are doing ie do something different that what public schools offer, have specialized training such as ASDEC or Lab School, are expensive and often require a multi-time per week commitment. Because the public schools are not offering this type of intervention, these tutors are often fully booked. You need to decide how committed you are to DC's remediation. Intensive tutoring can make a huge difference, but it is a financial and time commitment. For my DC, we home schooled grades 6, 7, 8 so he could still pursue his interests but get the intervention he needed. We couldn't afford private and we couldn't see adding to his and our after school load. |
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Op,
BTDT and still doing it. I have paid for tutors for a long time and believe it does help. The work load in middle school has been a challenge for my dc and we are struggling to fit in tutoring time but gut it out. I has helped my dc if we had a good tutor. I have used teachers from the school list and have fired several. Some have been awful. I usually look for teachers who work with sns kids but one of the worst teacher/tutors is a special ed teacher. She seemed to not have a clue about basic disabilities. Op, I think it is worth it if. |
| My strategy has been to fight for all we can get from the school and supplement the rest at home and through tutors if needed. IME, the ceiling for what we can get is what is covered in IDEA, IDA and other legislation. IME, schools do not go above and beyond the law and sometimes fall short. I want my child to receive services above and beyond- so we supplement. |
| I have two kids in middle school with mild to moderate special needs. I have hired tutors over the years, 7 years off and on, and I have found tutors to be generally ineffective. The reason I say that is because unless they are coordinating with the teachers, it is inconsistent and disconnected from what is being taught daily in the classroom. Even when they are in communication with the teachers, I found that the frequency of the tutoring sessions (2-3 times a week) take away from precious down time or extracurriculars. Both my kids enjoy sports and play through the school. I have found that playing sports and having a tutor outside school especially as kids get older are incompatible. And, after a while I noticed that my kids were beginning to find the tutoring punitive and would dread the times the tutor would come. When we had the tutor come on a weekend day, it would often interfere with weekend activities (i.e., parties, outings with friends, weekend sports). So, for the second year in a row, I have done without tutors and been in close communication with my kids teachers to make sure they are staying on top of their school work and getting the support they need. They are in a private school that works with kids like them with mild to moderate special needs. It hasn't been perfect but it also has not been as stressful either. Somehow I found the tutors stressful because I would find myself trying to get the kids motivated to work with the tutor on tutor days. Then, I hated the mandatory chit chat after sessions about what they were working on or having trouble with and progress made. I also did not find that having a tutor made a difference academically and felt like I was throwing money away. It is also a big money making racket in our region with a lot of high income two earner families. This is just my experience. Others may feel differently. I would not rule out tutors in the future but right now I am experiencing tutor burnout. |
I'm sorry for your experience. I posted above about the lab school tutor we use, and my dd actually likes tutoring. Every now and then, she complains, but I think she likes the one on one attention. I have the tutor work on reading and spelling mostly, and sometimes an assignment or two. The funny thing is that dd will cooperate with the tutor and work hard. One day as the tutor was leaving, she said, your dd sure loves to read, so we went a bit over. I was in shock because I truly cannot get dd to read for me or with me. What, dd loves to read? Anyway, I think there are ups and downs to tutoring, but so far, it has been helpful for us. We started the middle of first grade, and we are still tutoring in 3rd and even some over the summer. |
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We have had a tutor for our child for 6 years. The tutor has a Masters in Special Ed and all the progress my child has made is thanks to the tutor.
I second the PP that said you get what you can get privately and you supplement the rest. Sure the public school system should be responsible for teaching your child but to them, your child is just a name on a page. You can preach the law to them till your are blue in the face but the reality services are limited and some teachers and administrators are so burnt that they just don't give a damn. I interviewed tutors that fit our schedules and reprioritized our expenditures to afford her services. It was the best investment we made for our child. A child that was not on grade level for reading who was frustrated and hated school became not only on grade level but an Honors student who is well prepared for college. |
| ^ Sorry - meant to quote "You get what you get publically and supplement the rest." |
+1 I agree with the pp. We hired a tutor/babysitter for our DS who has ASD and attends an immersion language school. He doesn't have academic issues and is above grade level across the board but it's nice to have someone who can read and go over his homework since we don't know the immersion language. The tutor comes twice a wk and provides additional exposure to the language. They actually spend a lot of time playing Minecraft in Mandarin which is fine with us and we get to go out without DS. I don't think you can rely on the school to provide everything your child needs to succeed. |