S/O: Why did you decide not to cheat?

[Anonymous]

Has this ever happened to you?
You have been married a long time and life is comfortable. You get a chance to have a discreet one-night-stand with a person who you find alluring - no string attached and nobody will know about it - ever. You are very attracted to this person, strongly infatuated, feeling giddy like a teenager - and you decide not to sleep with them. Why?

[Anonymous]

See thread: s/o Men who want to abort the child should not pay child support.

[Anonymous]

Scared of STDs, too lazy to sneak around effectively, too stressed to choose illicit sex over nap or a bubble bath.
Waited out the run of marriage and now with awesome guy.

[Anonymous]

I have been tempted, very tempted. I find monogamy pretty awful. I do not have a lack of opportunity either. I work in a male dominated, high earning industry and I'm attractive and fit. Kind of like sharks and the minnow.

At the end of the day, I'd feel horrible. I would not want to live with the guilt and jeopardize my marriage. I'm also afraid that I might hook up with a guy, the sex be horrible or his dick small, and then I would have ended up "going there" for a bad fuck. Too much risk.

[Anonymous]

Did the thought that you might hurt your spouse or the spouse of OM/OW play a part in your decision?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have been tempted, very tempted. I find monogamy pretty awful. I do not have a lack of opportunity either. I work in a male dominated, high earning industry and I'm attractive and fit. Kind of like sharks and the minnow.

At the end of the day, I'd feel horrible. I would not want to live with the guilt and jeopardize my marriage. I'm also afraid that I might hook up with a guy, the sex be horrible or his dick small, and then I would have ended up "going there" for a bad fuck. Too much risk.

You made me laugh! Never in a million year this thought would have crossed my mind. Hilarious!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have been tempted, very tempted. I find monogamy pretty awful. I do not have a lack of opportunity either. I work in a male dominated, high earning industry and I'm attractive and fit. Kind of like sharks and the minnow.

At the end of the day, I'd feel horrible. I would not want to live with the guilt and jeopardize my marriage. I'm also afraid that I might hook up with a guy, the sex be horrible or his dick small, and then I would have ended up "going there" for a bad fuck. Too much risk.

THIS. The "temptation" for me was a very petite guy. I did the math. No way was this guy going to meet any kind of fantasy I had in my head. My DH is a pretty good lover, so the odds were I'd be very disappointed. So chose not to go there. But it's a weekly self-talk bec I work
Closely with said petite guy. But, yeah, 99.999% sure it would be dosappointing and reality would never match up to the fantasy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have been tempted, very tempted. I find monogamy pretty awful. I do not have a lack of opportunity either. I work in a male dominated, high earning industry and I'm attractive and fit. Kind of like sharks and the minnow.

At the end of the day, I'd feel horrible. I would not want to live with the guilt and jeopardize my marriage. I'm also afraid that I might hook up with a guy, the sex be horrible or his dick small, and then I would have ended up "going there" for a bad fuck. Too much risk.

the way you approach it, you must be an attorney

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have been tempted, very tempted. I find monogamy pretty awful. I do not have a lack of opportunity either. I work in a male dominated, high earning industry and I'm attractive and fit. Kind of like sharks and the minnow.

At the end of the day, I'd feel horrible. I would not want to live with the guilt and jeopardize my marriage. I'm also afraid that I might hook up with a guy, the sex be horrible or his dick small, and then I would have ended up "going there" for a bad fuck. Too much risk.

Not married but I have thought that too!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did the thought that you might hurt your spouse or the spouse of OM/OW play a part in your decision?

I was very very close one time to cheating on my DH with an ex. We were going through a rough time, ex had just gotten divorced, ran into him while we were both drinking (not a common occurrence - hadn't been drunk in years and hadn't seen ex in over a decade). I didn't though because I knew it would devastate my DH and mean the end of my marriage.

[Anonymous]

my kiddos. I didn't want to break up their home. And I could not have been with that man just once...I would have filed for divorce.

Dh did start treating me better and we are doing very well. Guy is with a girl who treats him like crap-he thinks she's the one...I dodged a freakin bullet!

[Anonymous]

Because fiction is much more interesting than reality?

[Anonymous]

Because as much as I've been tempted, I've only ever had sex with my DH of 25+ years, and I could never live with myself.

I think if I'd had sex with other men before DH, having sex with another guy wouldn't be as great a moral impediment, but who knows.

[Anonymous]

Most men over the age of 29 just are not that attractive, especially men. They are fat, bald, and dumpy. If more men looked like James Franco, I bet more women would cheat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did the thought that you might hurt your spouse or the spouse of OM/OW play a part in your decision?

The feelings of my spouse did not enter into the decision. She is from a foreign culture in which sex is seen as more a bodily function than an act of love or commitment. Roughly, it would be as if she found out I and another woman burped together. She would rather I not, but monogamy not that big a deal to her.