S/O: Why did you decide not to cheat?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have been tempted, very tempted. I find monogamy pretty awful. I do not have a lack of opportunity either. I work in a male dominated, high earning industry and I'm attractive and fit. Kind of like sharks and the minnow.

At the end of the day, I'd feel horrible. I would not want to live with the guilt and jeopardize my marriage. I'm also afraid that I might hook up with a guy, the sex be horrible or his dick small, and then I would have ended up "going there" for a bad fuck. Too much risk.

the way you approach it, you must be an attorney

Ha! Not even close at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Has this ever happened to you?
You have been married a long time and life is comfortable. You get a chance to have a discreet one-night-stand with a person who you find alluring - no string attached and nobody will know about it - ever. You are very attracted to this person, strongly infatuated, feeling giddy like a teenager - and you decide not to sleep with them. Why?

More to this though - sounds like women are quite capable of resisting the temptation to cheat from all the responses. But what about from the MEN's side? Are there any men here who has resisted given that this offer seem so good and therefore, impossible to resist? If you chose a pass, what held you back, just guilt for spouse?

[Anonymous]

I'm a man of my word. I swore an oath. I'm not an oath breaker. It's pretty simple.

[Anonymous]

It takes much longer than 1 night to train men to be good lovers. I have way too much respect for myself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It takes much longer than 1 night to train men to be good lovers. I have way too much respect for myself.

Plus I don't gain my self esteem from what other men (or women) think of me.

I have had at least 15 opportunities during my marriage.

[Anonymous]

DH here, in order:

1. Fear of STDs
2. Fear of having the OW become attached and stalk me.
3. Hate having to constantly secure my phone, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did the thought that you might hurt your spouse or the spouse of OM/OW play a part in your decision?

No.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH here, in order:

1. Fear of STDs
2. Fear of having the OW become attached and stalk me.
3. Hate having to constantly secure my phone, etc.

But the op's proposition was that it is a no strings attached thung for sure. In any case, u think u really can be so rational if an attractive woman just jump on you/kiss you?

[Anonymous]

I made a promise. It matters to me that I keep that promise. I don't want to jeopardize my marriage or my family. And, while sex is nice, it's just sex. One night of fun isn't worth becoming a person without integrity in my own eyes. I have to look at myself in the mirror every day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH here, in order:

1. Fear of STDs
2. Fear of having the OW become attached and stalk me.
3. Hate having to constantly secure my phone, etc.

But the op's proposition was that it is a no strings attached thung for sure. In any case, u think u really can be so rational if an attractive woman just jump on you/kiss you?

If I knew it was going to be NSA, and no risk of STDs, then yes, I would cheat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have been tempted, very tempted. I find monogamy pretty awful. I do not have a lack of opportunity either. I work in a male dominated, high earning industry and I'm attractive and fit. Kind of like sharks and the minnow.

At the end of the day, I'd feel horrible. I would not want to live with the guilt and jeopardize my marriage. I'm also afraid that I might hook up with a guy, the sex be horrible or his dick small, and then I would have ended up "going there" for a bad fuck. Too much risk.

THIS. The "temptation" for me was a very petite guy. I did the math. No way was this guy going to meet any kind of fantasy I had in my head. My DH is a pretty good lover, so the odds were I'd be very disappointed. So chose not to go there. But it's a weekly self-talk bec I work
Closely with said petite guy. But, yeah, 99.999% sure it would be dosappointing and reality would never match up to the fantasy.

Never know. I dated a guy that was shorter than me and that man was hung and a great lay.

[Anonymous]

Man here. Like everyone, plenty of chances. Wouldn't do it for sex since DW is great in bed. So for me, it's a lot about not having a compelling reason why I would.

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

Because I've seen "Fatal Attraction."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because I've seen "Fatal Attraction."

Is that a real fear for men that the women will become stalkerish?

What about if the woman is married with children too?