My dd is being made fun of for eating salads

[Anonymous]

She is in ninth grade at a new school. She loves salads. Dd has them for dinner a couple of times a week, and each day on the weekend. She just really likes the taste.

She is now bringing them to school for lunch a couple of times a week. Apparently other girls are spreading rumors that dd thinks she's fat and has an eating disorder. Neither is true.

How can I help her deal with this?

[Anonymous]

How big of a school is this? If it's a small private, I'd consider talking with the HOS b/c this is essentially bullying.

Maybe she should bring other things for lunch in the meantime b/c she's still pretty new, so hopefully she can turn the gossip. Girls are mean though. Sad that this started in the first place.

[Anonymous]

Wow, the things douche kids will belittle over.....sorry and hope she speaks up.

[Anonymous]

I think you should be clear that people will find anything/everything to pick on. As long as she's healthy, happy, and doing what she feels is best, she shouldn't be concerned about others opinions. Also, you can give an advisor/counselor a heads up about the issue.

[Anonymous]

It's fine if she likes salads. Can she bring something else too, a cookie, some chips? Honestly usually girls that eat like that often do have an ed so it seems the best way is to show she eats other foods too . She just happens to like salads.

[Anonymous]

Tell her to not take it personally and to make a joke out of it. People are assholes and there is no need to freak out and get the principal/police/your boss/you name it involved every time someone acts like a jerk. Tell her it will come back to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's fine if she likes salads. Can she bring something else too, a cookie, some chips? Honestly usually girls that eat like that often do have an ed so it seems the best way is to show she eats other foods too . She just happens to like salads.

She usually brings either pretzels or crackers with her salads. Dd is just not a junk food kind of kid. She's got no sweet tooth. If she were to gorge it would be on bread and cheese.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She is in ninth grade at a new school. She loves salads. Dd has them for dinner a couple of times a week, and each day on the weekend. She just really likes the taste.

She is now bringing them to school for lunch a couple of times a week. Apparently other girls are spreading rumors that dd thinks she's fat and has an eating disorder. Neither is true.

How can I help her deal with this?

Teach her to not care what other people think. There will always be some queen bee/mean girl/jerk. Some idiot will spread rumors because they're jealous, or stupid, or acting out their own sadness and frustration. Teach your daughter to confront bullies (if that's what you think them to be), and to ignore idle gossip. Teach her that she is as worthy of compassion and kindness as everyone else (and should act accordingly). Teach her to be confident about her decisions. 9th grade is as good a time as any to learn this skill set; she'll have several opportunities to practice!

If the mean girl crap continues after your daughter has had a chance to deal with it herself, then you can get the school involved.

PS - I don't mean this to offend or worry you, but this sort of "they're gossiping about me" approach was my own, passive way of telling my mother I had an eating disorder. It is entirely possible that she really does just like salad. But if you are at all concerned, maybe having some body confidence talk(s) alongside the social confidence talk would be beneficial.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like the ritual of being the new kid.
If there wasn't the salad to latch on to, the meanies would have picked something else.
She can go to the counselor who will have a talk with the kids about spreading rumors and commenting on someone's appearance, or you can (in a non-confrontational, low-key way).
It should be over in a few weeks. Is she already making a few friends? That will help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's fine if she likes salads. Can she bring something else too, a cookie, some chips? Honestly usually girls that eat like that often do have an ed so it seems the best way is to show she eats other foods too . She just happens to like salads.

She usually brings either pretzels or crackers with her salads. Dd is just not a junk food kind of kid. She's got no sweet tooth. If she were to gorge it would be on bread and cheese.

It sounds like you both may have some eating issues. who said anything about gorging?

[Anonymous]

She will survive.

They will get diabeetus.

[Anonymous]

I was a chubby kid and that's exactly why I didn't eat salads at school. Though the fat was obvious. I didn't want to admit it. So I just got fatter and fatter...WTF is with kids mocking for salads.
PP is right - she'll live to be 100+ and they'll lose toes from a small splinter!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's fine if she likes salads. Can she bring something else too, a cookie, some chips? Honestly usually girls that eat like that often do have an ed so it seems the best way is to show she eats other foods too . She just happens to like salads.

She usually brings either pretzels or crackers with her salads. Dd is just not a junk food kind of kid. She's got no sweet tooth. If she were to gorge it would be on bread and cheese.

It sounds like you both may have some eating issues. who said anything about gorging?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's fine if she likes salads. Can she bring something else too, a cookie, some chips? Honestly usually girls that eat like that often do have an ed so it seems the best way is to show she eats other foods too . She just happens to like salads.

She usually brings either pretzels or crackers with her salads. Dd is just not a junk food kind of kid. She's got no sweet tooth. If she were to gorge it would be on bread and cheese.

It sounds like you both may have some eating issues. who said anything about gorging?

Why the roll? It is odd for OP to make the leap to that word; who said anything about gorging?

[Anonymous]

Let's be real. 9th grade girls who eat salads everyday are dieting.