Preparing your kid for adulthood when they're not "college material"

[Anonymous]

Have a young SN kid and we're doing everything we can in terms of therapies, but the writing is pretty much on the wall.

Who guides you in preparing for when your kid becomes an adult? How do you figure out living situations like group homes or what job training programs are available?

We live in Montgomery Co. if folks have specific suggestions.

[Anonymous]

If you really think they will not be independent, get them on the county or state waivers and dad as those take years. Ours can got either way so we are hoping for the best and planning for college. What our chikd looked like at 2/3 is different from 4/5 so if your kid is young focus on the present.

[Anonymous]

I wasn't "college material." My parents pushed me towards learning a job that would allow me to support myself. I didn't move out until I was 23. I've been fired from a lot of jobs. Being a person is really, really hard. There's really just no good solution.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have a young SN kid and we're doing everything we can in terms of therapies, but the writing is pretty much on the wall.

Who guides you in preparing for when your kid becomes an adult? How do you figure out living situations like group homes or what job training programs are available?

We live in Montgomery Co. if folks have specific suggestions.

OP what is your child's DX? is she/he able to go to trade school?

[Anonymous]

You should call the director of special education in Montgomery county MD.

http://www.montgomeryschoolsmd.org/departments/special-education/

My neighbor's son went to school (work study) until he was 21, worked a job, learned how to take the bus/metro, eventually found housing (rented a room) with the assistance of a mentor and is now living on his own in an apartment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you really think they will not be independent, get them on the county or state waivers and dad as those take years. Ours can got either way so we are hoping for the best and planning for college. What our chikd looked like at 2/3 is different from 4/5 so if your kid is young focus on the present.

A child who cannot work because of developmental disability will be eligible for SSDI. It is drawn on the basis of the parent's contributions. You have to show that the child has suffered the condition since childhood, so you'll want to keep track of those medical records.

[Anonymous]

Check your community college to see what trade programs are available. Our does auto repair and carpentry and welding and machinist and cooking, among others.

[Anonymous]

My nephew is on the spectrum and he is 22. He still attends a special high school program that is work study. He is now training as an industrial window washer. He LOVES it. When he has completed his training he will get a union card and will have a job. The only difficulty my sister has found with this is that he doesn't like to take days off and wishes he could go to work every day because he BELONGS at work.

They live in Michigan but there should be a great program somewhere in Maryland for you. Good luck! He is the happiest guy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My nephew is on the spectrum and he is 22. He still attends a special high school program that is work study. He is now training as an industrial window washer. He LOVES it. When he has completed his training he will get a union card and will have a job. The only difficulty my sister has found with this is that he doesn't like to take days off and wishes he could go to work every day because he BELONGS at work.

They live in Michigan but there should be a great program somewhere in Maryland for you. Good luck! He is the happiest guy.

Np, but omg, that sounds amazing!. It just sounds like such a perfect situation, it makes me choked up just thinking about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wasn't "college material." My parents pushed me towards learning a job that would allow me to support myself. I didn't move out until I was 23. I've been fired from a lot of jobs. Being a person is really, really hard. There's really just no good solution.

Can you explain what your diagnosis is and why you were fired from jobs? What do you wish that your parents have done differently?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My nephew is on the spectrum and he is 22. He still attends a special high school program that is work study. He is now training as an industrial window washer. He LOVES it. When he has completed his training he will get a union card and will have a job. The only difficulty my sister has found with this is that he doesn't like to take days off and wishes he could go to work every day because he BELONGS at work.

They live in Michigan but there should be a great program somewhere in Maryland for you. Good luck! He is the happiest guy.

Np, but omg, that sounds amazing!. It just sounds like such a perfect situation, it makes me choked up just thinking about it.

Yes. a coworker of my DH's mentioned that his DS who has Asbergers attends Churchill and is in a phenomenal apprenticeship program where he is learning a trade from a bunch of old timers....men in their late 60s-70s who have been in that particular trade for a long time.

[Anonymous]

I think it's hard when your child is really young to figure out the answers to the questions that you are asking because you don't know how far they will progress. But, being there with a high schooler, here's what I did. I got every service imaginable for my son through the school and paid for additional services privately. Accepted the fact that not everyone goes to college and started looking early for other options. Invested time in learning about vocational programs through the school system and helping my son to develop interests that are compatible with the programs that are offered. Worked with him on behavior and, as much as possible, grades, to make him attractive to vo-tech since it's an application only program and there is no guarantee he will get in. I work a lot with him on money and budgeting so that hopefully he will be able to manage on his own when the time comes. I have him volunteer as often as possible (for the past three summers, he's volunteered 40 hours per week for 5 or more weeks over the summer). And, the last thing I can think of is that I spent a lot of time introducing him to a non-DC lifestyle. I have family in rural areas where he will fit much better than he does in DC and the cost of living is much lower. Given a realistic view of his options, I cannot see him being able to afford living in this area. I'll know in a few years if any of this worked.

[Anonymous]

Good luck everyone.

The situation we face is that my son is probably sort of on the border line of being college material. He is in 9th grade so the coming years will tell if he will go to college. It is hard - don't know whether to encourage him to think in terms of college or not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Good luck everyone.

The situation we face is that my son is probably sort of on the border line of being college material. He is in 9th grade so the coming years will tell if he will go to college. It is hard - don't know whether to encourage him to think in terms of college or not.

I would give him a chance and take a few community college classes and fine out. Why rule it out. He may do better in college than high school (I did much better) as he may find the classes more interesting. Othwerise, I would steer him to plumbing or electrician as they seem to make decent money and the good ones are in high demand.

[Anonymous]

I heard a report about the trades and how fewer people are being prepared for such work and that some trade jobs can pay in the 6 figures. The example they gave was someone who operates some type of construction truck or digger.