Half of British women reach age 30 without having a child

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know people are just responding to brunch granny, buy beyond the inflammatory trolling, there is a grain of truth there. The 21st century economy is incompatible with raising kids with two parents in the workforce. As a result, the birth rate will continue to decline. I would love it if our society didn’t view anyone over 40 as “past it,” allowing women to have children young *if they want* and then having a career later.

I have three and needed IVF for 2. I would have loved to have 4, but it was impossible. In our 20s, my husband and I were struggling with student loans and trying to get jobs. It’s only gotten worse.

I feel very lucky then because my husband and I both managed to work full time the entire time we were raising our kids, thanks to home daycare and an awesome nanny when the kids got older.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I haven’t met a woman with kids who had them under thirty in years. I can’t even recall. Years ago, like people in the 90s maybe a few. And that girl from high school.

I have one friend who had her first at 29. But only one friend, and she's one of the few who didn't go to grad school.

[Anonymous]

"
1. Find a suitable spouse (date long enough for proper research.) and also become financially stable. These two can be happening at the same time.
2. Marry (only after step 1 is complete)
3. Buy a home of some sort or at least have stable housing
4. Have kids"

I did it in this order:

Start becoming financially stable
Buy a home
Find a suitable spouse and then marry
Have kids

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also she brags about her 21 year old daughter who married a med student. So old school. I would rather that my daughter was the doctor, not the doctors wife.

+100

Didn't gen X nana say her oldest daughter was an RN or a teacher? Hardly an insignificant career, with both requiring a master's degree and offering great pay vis a vis work-life balance, plus great health care and fringe benefits. You jaded spinsters – and don't deny that you're not, you're fooling no one – are twisting everything to paint her as low class white trash, with a barefoot and pregnant SAHM 20-something daughter and some budding MD son in law who of course cheats on her with classmates and will divorce her to marry some surgeon or lawyer. Your cynicism suggests you're deeply unhappy.

You don't have to be jaded or a spinster to realize that women have other options than pink color jobs (nursing, teaching) or marrying a doctor. Come into the 21st century, please.

Not that there's anything wrong with those things, but you and the Brunch Granny seem to think that everyone should be content with the same options we had 75 years ago.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also she brags about her 21 year old daughter who married a med student. So old school. I would rather that my daughter was the doctor, not the doctors wife.

+100

Didn't gen X nana say her oldest daughter was an RN or a teacher? Hardly an insignificant career, with both requiring a master's degree and offering great pay vis a vis work-life balance, plus great health care and fringe benefits. You jaded spinsters – and don't deny that you're not, you're fooling no one – are twisting everything to paint her as low class white trash, with a barefoot and pregnant SAHM 20-something daughter and some budding MD son in law who of course cheats on her with classmates and will divorce her to marry some surgeon or lawyer. Your cynicism suggests you're deeply unhappy.

You don't have to be jaded or a spinster to realize that women have other options than pink color jobs (nursing, teaching) or marrying a doctor. Come into the 21st century, please.

Not that there's anything wrong with those things, but you and the Brunch Granny seem to think that everyone should be content with the same options we had 75 years ago.

Nearly all actual parents, of both girls and boys, would love for their children to become a college educated school teacher or registered nurse married to a medical doctor. On what freakin' planet do you live on that this outcome would be a disappointment or in any way retrograde? Teachers can become six-figure administrators, nurses can segue into management and make a million bucks a year. You are off your rocker, perhaps blinded by disdain and bitterness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also she brags about her 21 year old daughter who married a med student. So old school. I would rather that my daughter was the doctor, not the doctors wife.

+100

Didn't gen X nana say her oldest daughter was an RN or a teacher? Hardly an insignificant career, with both requiring a master's degree and offering great pay vis a vis work-life balance, plus great health care and fringe benefits. You jaded spinsters – and don't deny that you're not, you're fooling no one – are twisting everything to paint her as low class white trash, with a barefoot and pregnant SAHM 20-something daughter and some budding MD son in law who of course cheats on her with classmates and will divorce her to marry some surgeon or lawyer. Your cynicism suggests you're deeply unhappy.

NP. If there’s a fool proof way to know which husbands will not cheat or which ones will not divorce you once they are in their 50’s and 60’s, let us know. This has nothing to do with cynicism and everything to do with reality.

[Anonymous]

Nothing less than two high-powered business executives, white show law firm attorneys, or surgeons for my son or daughter AND their spouse! That way they can both be stressed out, work relentless hours, and pay strangers to raise their kids! If my child or their spouse becomes something "pink" like a $100k nurse or $75k inner-city public school teacher with summers, holidays and weekends off, I will NOT pay for the wedding!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also she brags about her 21 year old daughter who married a med student. So old school. I would rather that my daughter was the doctor, not the doctors wife.

+100

Didn't gen X nana say her oldest daughter was an RN or a teacher? Hardly an insignificant career, with both requiring a master's degree and offering great pay vis a vis work-life balance, plus great health care and fringe benefits. You jaded spinsters – and don't deny that you're not, you're fooling no one – are twisting everything to paint her as low class white trash, with a barefoot and pregnant SAHM 20-something daughter and some budding MD son in law who of course cheats on her with classmates and will divorce her to marry some surgeon or lawyer. Your cynicism suggests you're deeply unhappy.

You don't have to be jaded or a spinster to realize that women have other options than pink color jobs (nursing, teaching) or marrying a doctor. Come into the 21st century, please.

Not that there's anything wrong with those things, but you and the Brunch Granny seem to think that everyone should be content with the same options we had 75 years ago.

Nearly all actual parents, of both girls and boys, would love for their children to become a college educated school teacher or registered nurse married to a medical doctor. On what freakin' planet do you live on that this outcome would be a disappointment or in any way retrograde? Teachers can become six-figure administrators, nurses can segue into management and make a million bucks a year. You are off your rocker, perhaps blinded by disdain and bitterness.

LOL, okay. Sorry, I don't know any nurses who make a million bucks a year. The Granny wants every woman to shut up and get married and pregnant in their early 20s. They are allowed to have a career if it comes second to their Number One Jobs as Babymaker and Wife, soon to be Grandmother. And she (and you) insult anyone who suggests that it's okay for people to choose a different path.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also she brags about her 21 year old daughter who married a med student. So old school. I would rather that my daughter was the doctor, not the doctors wife.

+100

Didn't gen X nana say her oldest daughter was an RN or a teacher? Hardly an insignificant career, with both requiring a master's degree and offering great pay vis a vis work-life balance, plus great health care and fringe benefits. You jaded spinsters – and don't deny that you're not, you're fooling no one – are twisting everything to paint her as low class white trash, with a barefoot and pregnant SAHM 20-something daughter and some budding MD son in law who of course cheats on her with classmates and will divorce her to marry some surgeon or lawyer. Your cynicism suggests you're deeply unhappy.

Why would jaded spinsters be on a site for MOMS? The vast majority of people on here are mothers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also she brags about her 21 year old daughter who married a med student. So old school. I would rather that my daughter was the doctor, not the doctors wife.

+100

Didn't gen X nana say her oldest daughter was an RN or a teacher? Hardly an insignificant career, with both requiring a master's degree and offering great pay vis a vis work-life balance, plus great health care and fringe benefits. You jaded spinsters – and don't deny that you're not, you're fooling no one – are twisting everything to paint her as low class white trash, with a barefoot and pregnant SAHM 20-something daughter and some budding MD son in law who of course cheats on her with classmates and will divorce her to marry some surgeon or lawyer. Your cynicism suggests you're deeply unhappy.

You don't have to be jaded or a spinster to realize that women have other options than pink color jobs (nursing, teaching) or marrying a doctor. Come into the 21st century, please.

Not that there's anything wrong with those things, but you and the Brunch Granny seem to think that everyone should be content with the same options we had 75 years ago.

Nearly all actual parents, of both girls and boys, would love for their children to become a college educated school teacher or registered nurse married to a medical doctor. On what freakin' planet do you live on that this outcome would be a disappointment or in any way retrograde? Teachers can become six-figure administrators, nurses can segue into management and make a million bucks a year. You are off your rocker, perhaps blinded by disdain and bitterness.

LOL, okay. Sorry, I don't know any nurses who make a million bucks a year. The Granny wants every woman to shut up and get married and pregnant in their early 20s. They are allowed to have a career if it comes second to their Number One Jobs as Babymaker and Wife, soon to be Grandmother. And she (and you) insult anyone who suggests that it's okay for people to choose a different path.

+1. This is the problem.

I don't care if women have babies at 22 or 42. I don't care if they become nurses, teachers, doctors, CEOs, or SAHMs. I don't care if they marry a doctor or a SAHD. I respect that each woman can decide what is best for her.

Brunch Granny wants ALL women to forgo career building and having fun in their 20s, instead marrying and having babies by their early 20s, no exceptions. Despite multiple women telling her that they are quite happy with how their lives turned out with waiting until their 30s/40s to settle down.

She is either a troll, or has some sort of mental illness, because ranting how all women need to stop watching SATC and live their lives exactly the way she did isn't normal behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also she brags about her 21 year old daughter who married a med student. So old school. I would rather that my daughter was the doctor, not the doctors wife.

+100

Didn't gen X nana say her oldest daughter was an RN or a teacher? Hardly an insignificant career, with both requiring a master's degree and offering great pay vis a vis work-life balance, plus great health care and fringe benefits. You jaded spinsters – and don't deny that you're not, you're fooling no one – are twisting everything to paint her as low class white trash, with a barefoot and pregnant SAHM 20-something daughter and some budding MD son in law who of course cheats on her with classmates and will divorce her to marry some surgeon or lawyer. Your cynicism suggests you're deeply unhappy.

You don't have to be jaded or a spinster to realize that women have other options than pink color jobs (nursing, teaching) or marrying a doctor. Come into the 21st century, please.

Not that there's anything wrong with those things, but you and the Brunch Granny seem to think that everyone should be content with the same options we had 75 years ago.

Nearly all actual parents, of both girls and boys, would love for their children to become a college educated school teacher or registered nurse married to a medical doctor. On what freakin' planet do you live on that this outcome would be a disappointment or in any way retrograde? Teachers can become six-figure administrators, nurses can segue into management and make a million bucks a year. You are off your rocker, perhaps blinded by disdain and bitterness.

I am a third generation attorney. I'm fine with my kids becoming nurses or teachers but don't act like those professions are a step up for all of our families.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nothing less than two high-powered business executives, white show law firm attorneys, or surgeons for my son or daughter AND their spouse! That way they can both be stressed out, work relentless hours, and pay strangers to raise their kids! If my child or their spouse becomes something "pink" like a $100k nurse or $75k inner-city public school teacher with summers, holidays and weekends off, I will NOT pay for the wedding!

Now we've come back full circle. The way to do it is to be two high powered executives until the couple are in their mid 30s. Then the wife starts having kids, and downshifts to making less money at a lower stress job with fewer hours, while still working full time, at age 35. The work experience and savings accumulated by the couple who waits to have kids until their mid 30s allows them to send their kids to college debt free. Then the husband retires at 58 while the wife keeps working, since after all she is an empty nester now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing less than two high-powered business executives, white show law firm attorneys, or surgeons for my son or daughter AND their spouse! That way they can both be stressed out, work relentless hours, and pay strangers to raise their kids! If my child or their spouse becomes something "pink" like a $100k nurse or $75k inner-city public school teacher with summers, holidays and weekends off, I will NOT pay for the wedding!

Now we've come back full circle. The way to do it is to be two high powered executives until the couple are in their mid 30s. Then the wife starts having kids, and downshifts to making less money at a lower stress job with fewer hours, while still working full time, at age 35. The work experience and savings accumulated by the couple who waits to have kids until their mid 30s allows them to send their kids to college debt free. Then the husband retires at 58 while the wife keeps working, since after all she is an empty nester now.

So you are clearly status-obsessed striver complete with a "I have it all mapped out" perfect playbook. Good for you, dear. But stop acting as if everyone is wired like you. And even those wired like you often fall short or are diverted. Further, most with successful parents just aren't obsessed with the status and income generation by any and all means necessary; they are confident and comfortable and don't give a damn about an extra $50k or $100k a year. It won't change their life, if anything, it'll just come with less free time, more stress and demands. As long as they make enough for a comfortable lifestyle, the rest is gravy. They also know they have a half-decent inheritance to look forward to, likely from both sides of the family. Thus, family and children are at the top of the hierarchy, not that must seek the most money, most status, most prestige striver social climber grind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing less than two high-powered business executives, white show law firm attorneys, or surgeons for my son or daughter AND their spouse! That way they can both be stressed out, work relentless hours, and pay strangers to raise their kids! If my child or their spouse becomes something "pink" like a $100k nurse or $75k inner-city public school teacher with summers, holidays and weekends off, I will NOT pay for the wedding!

Now we've come back full circle. The way to do it is to be two high powered executives until the couple are in their mid 30s. Then the wife starts having kids, and downshifts to making less money at a lower stress job with fewer hours, while still working full time, at age 35. The work experience and savings accumulated by the couple who waits to have kids until their mid 30s allows them to send their kids to college debt free. Then the husband retires at 58 while the wife keeps working, since after all she is an empty nester now.

So you are clearly status-obsessed striver complete with a "I have it all mapped out" perfect playbook. Good for you, dear. But stop acting as if everyone is wired like you. And even those wired like you often fall short or are diverted. Further, most with successful parents just aren't obsessed with the status and income generation by any and all means necessary; they are confident and comfortable and don't give a damn about an extra $50k or $100k a year. It won't change their life, if anything, it'll just come with less free time, more stress and demands. As long as they make enough for a comfortable lifestyle, the rest is gravy. They also know they have a half-decent inheritance to look forward to, likely from both sides of the family. Thus, family and children are at the top of the hierarchy, not that must seek the most money, most status, most prestige striver social climber grind.

So you're bragging that you were born into a rich family and look down your nose at a couple who earned their money? Huh. No wonder people hate the old money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing less than two high-powered business executives, white show law firm attorneys, or surgeons for my son or daughter AND their spouse! That way they can both be stressed out, work relentless hours, and pay strangers to raise their kids! If my child or their spouse becomes something "pink" like a $100k nurse or $75k inner-city public school teacher with summers, holidays and weekends off, I will NOT pay for the wedding!

Now we've come back full circle. The way to do it is to be two high powered executives until the couple are in their mid 30s. Then the wife starts having kids, and downshifts to making less money at a lower stress job with fewer hours, while still working full time, at age 35. The work experience and savings accumulated by the couple who waits to have kids until their mid 30s allows them to send their kids to college debt free. Then the husband retires at 58 while the wife keeps working, since after all she is an empty nester now.

So you are clearly status-obsessed striver complete with a "I have it all mapped out" perfect playbook. Good for you, dear. But stop acting as if everyone is wired like you. And even those wired like you often fall short or are diverted. Further, most with successful parents just aren't obsessed with the status and income generation by any and all means necessary; they are confident and comfortable and don't give a damn about an extra $50k or $100k a year. It won't change their life, if anything, it'll just come with less free time, more stress and demands. As long as they make enough for a comfortable lifestyle, the rest is gravy. They also know they have a half-decent inheritance to look forward to, likely from both sides of the family. Thus, family and children are at the top of the hierarchy, not that must seek the most money, most status, most prestige striver social climber grind.

So you're bragging that you were born into a rich family and look down your nose at a couple who earned their money? Huh. No wonder people hate the old money.

This is nonsense - NP here. Brunch grandma is poor and she's not educated. More $ is ALWAYS better. We both work, make 1/2M a year and we get to invest the dividends; we are building a bigger nest for our children. Brunch grandma is crazy if she thinks that having more money brings stress and less free time. The biggest luxury of having $$$$$ is being in charge of one's time and having good options - for outsourcing menial housework, for picking good jobs and homes - trust funder here. We don't look down at earned income, our $ started as earned income too. Just social strivers.