Really? She gets to be pregnant?

[Anonymous]

I was at Verizon Center recently and passed a woman with a 2-3ish year old in an umbrella stroller, who was clearly drunk/high based off her slurred speech. She as t least 5 months pregnant based on her baby bump. And to top it all off, she was smoking a cigarette. I don't understand how she gets to be pregnant but I don't. I know life is unfair but really? This makes sense for propagating humans?

[Anonymous]

Pregnancy isn't a prize handed out by a fairy godmother for good girls to win.

She may absolutely hate being pregnant. She may be positively terrified.

She may not even be pregnant at all. When I worked inn public health in the Deep South, I worked with many women I was sure were in 2nd or even third trimester. They weren't expecting a new baby. Bellies never went down after last pregnancy due to various lifestyle issues including alcohol/drugs but also the poverty diet of starches and fats.

[Anonymous]

Heavy alcohol consumption will pooch out a belly to the point of looking pregnant. She probably wasn't pregnant.

[Anonymous]

I have a relative who has two children with different men (neither of whom is in any way involved), and who smoked through both pregnancies and can't even aupport herself, let alone them. It's not about you.

[Anonymous]

I know it's not about me. However it makes me sad/angry that someone who doesn't care at all about her child/herself has a child and was clearly pregnant with another can be pregnant and I'm not. That's all. It was a vent. If you can't be sympathetic or move on, perhaps this forum is not for you? Just a thought.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know it's not about me. However it makes me sad/angry that someone who doesn't care at all about her child/herself has a child and was clearly pregnant with another can be pregnant and I'm not. That's all. It was a vent. If you can't be sympathetic or move on, perhaps this forum is not for you? Just a thought.

People are trying to help you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know it's not about me. However it makes me sad/angry that someone who doesn't care at all about her child/herself has a child and was clearly pregnant with another can be pregnant and I'm not. That's all. It was a vent. If you can't be sympathetic or move on, perhaps this forum is not for you? Just a thought.

You publicly posted a mean-spirited vent. That's okay. People have mean-spirited thoughts all the time, because not everyone is nice all the time, and thank heavens that the internet exists so that people can say every mean-spirited thing that comes into their heads. Of course life is not fair. It's not fair that you want a child and are having trouble having one. I wish that wasn't happening to you. It's not fair that this woman has a child that she is not taking as good care as I would with mine. I wish that wasn't happening to that child. It's not fair to her unborn child (if she is pregnant - and she might not be), that she is taking such poor care of herself right now. I wish that wasn't happening either.

But you really should not expect everyone to be blanket sympathetic to a mean-spirited vent. If you can't handle people disagreeing with you, perhaps this forum is not for you. Just a thought.

[Anonymous]

I've been in your shoes OP. You just have to work at not letting it bother you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was at Verizon Center recently and passed a woman with a 2-3ish year old in an umbrella stroller, who was clearly drunk/high based off her slurred speech. She as t least 5 months pregnant based on her baby bump. And to top it all off, she was smoking a cigarette. I don't understand how she gets to be pregnant but I don't. I know life is unfair but really? This makes sense for propagating humans?

Totally understand, OP. I made it to the other side of the fertility struggle, but the pain of the journey is still pretty fresh and I get what you're saying. Hugs.

[Anonymous]

I understand, OP. When I see losers like that with kids it breaks my heart, especially for the friends who've had fertility issues. Fortunately, through adoption and in one case of Clomid, all these wonderful people can call themselves parents.

[Anonymous]

I don't usually post in this forum but my family has an inherited genetic disorder. My mom looks "drunk" and uncoordinated. My daughter looks tired all the time and in need of a nap. I guess we shouldn't be out in public.

Stop judging. When you are a mom, your kid will have public tantrums, and women who aren't moms yet will think you aren't fit to be a mom, or that they kid do better, or some nonsense. Everyone is struggling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't usually post in this forum but my family has an inherited genetic disorder. My mom looks "drunk" and uncoordinated. My daughter looks tired all the time and in need of a nap. I guess we shouldn't be out in public.

Stop judging. When you are a mom, your kid will have public tantrums, and women who aren't moms yet will think you aren't fit to be a mom, or that they kid do better, or some nonsense. Everyone is struggling.

+1

[Anonymous]

Slurred speech and she's drunk. Wow.

[Anonymous]

Ms can cause slurred speech FYI.

[Anonymous]

Something like this you cannot argue based on logic.

That is like saying why can a woman in CA who is single and on welfare already with six kids, get pregnant again and birth eight kids when many gay couples in the U.S. cannot even legally marry??

One cannot argue the logic of on one hand why one person can rightfully become a parent to 14 healthy children when they are not "fit" to be a parent, yet many loving couples are denied the right to live as a married union just because.



It's just life. And life is never going to be fair. Never.