Question for those who have used Match.com

[Anonymous]

So, I signed up for Match.com Tuesday night last week. My profile got a bunch of traffic, likes, messages the first 24 hours which I understand is to be expected. Since then, it's been sort of steady - maybe 20 new views and 5 or so new 'interactions' (likes, winks, messages) per day. In the last 24 hours, it has gone nuts. I think I had 12 new interactions.

Anyone know why this might be? Is there typically a 'best traffic day of the week' on Match? Is it because it's the last day of the month (though I can't imagine why this would matter, since subscriptions are not tied to the calendar as far as I understand it)? I didn't put up new pictures or change any of the ones that were already there.

[Anonymous]

You probably showed up as a "featured member" or something like that.

[Anonymous]

Any user can search and filter using a number of criteria - including"newest" so that explains why you may have felt bombarded. Also, if you're an attractive woman, this is basically par for the course.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Any user can search and filter using a number of criteria - including"newest" so that explains why you may have felt bombarded. Also, if you're an attractive woman, this is basically par for the course.

This. "Fresh Meat".

[Anonymous]

A very attractive friend of mine got over 300 responses in her first couple of days on the site. She complained about it and the rest of us were like, "yeah, F off." Most of us haven't gotten 300 reponses total in the years we've been on all the sites combined.

[Anonymous]

OP here - thanks for the input.

I am female, and I am, objectively, reasonably attractive. It's been like 8 days now and I've had over 200 total views, but nowhere near that number of interactions - probably 40 or so. It is a bit overwhelming, but I'm definitely not bragging. Most of these are guys that I'm not interested in, the messages are quite generic "Hi sexy" or something like that. I've emailed with a couple of people who sent me actually normal messages so far, and two that I initiated emails with didn't reply to me, so I definitely don't think I'm killing it at online dating or anything.

[Anonymous]

Not related but wanted to share -- I met my hubby my first week on match. . Hope you also find what you're looking for.

[Anonymous]

Thanks PP, I do too (OP here).

So far it seems like quantity over quality on match. Out of the 'steady traffic' so far I've replied to emails from 2 guys who actually mentioned something in my profile that they found interesting/we had in common, didn't identify as something I have as a deal-breaker (e.g. separated, not single/widowed/divorced) and didn't sound creepy or angry. One I am still emailing with, about 3-4 emails in, I would think the logical next step would be coffee or a drink soon. I have emailed 5 men myself now who I thought sounded interesting, haven't heard back from any yet. From what I have seen on my searches and the matches suggested that are sent to me, there might be another 10 or 15 guys that I would be interested enough to initiate emails myself.

One thing I did find interesting is comparing notes with a friend who's on another site. We identified some of the same guys on both. It seems that it's reasonably common to be on more than one site, but it's interesting how the profiles are tailored (or not) to the specific sites (she's on a religious site), and guys claim they are so into their faith on that site don't even mention it on Match, or have basically copy/pasted their Match profile onto the religious site, with no mention at all of how they actually are or practice that faith.

She did get one message from a guy who listed his ideal date as going for a hot dog at Costco, and answered the question ''what have you learned from previous relationships' with the statement that he hadn't had any. He lists his age as 32.

It's an interesting world out there.

[Anonymous]

I've posted many times on here about my experiences with online dating -- and your last post, OP, is spot on. There is a lot of crossover. I did that at times, and would see the same guys over and over. I might do a paid site (religious) and then a free site (OKC) at the same time. I was consistent of course b/c I wasn't lying about anything.

There are lots of men and women who are serial daters. It's up to you to weed through all the BS to find someone that is right for you. It's no different than meeting people IRL, except you have no references for them (like you would through a friend or through a group). Otherwise, you have to meet (and probably kiss!) a lot of frogs. I agree it's quantity over quality, but you will get better at figuring out what to look for.

I've also said before, broaden your searches, give good men a try in person, even if they are not the same religion, they have some other thing that strikes you as "not ideal." There is always going to be some compromise. You should have a short list of your non-negotiables...and lots of things can be changed.

That's what I did and eventually I met a great guy. It was a learning process -- I wasted time with men that were not right for me. I had to do that to figure out what I absolutely needed and then I stuck to it. I had fun in the process, but I also got hurt. It happens. Have some fun with it...get out, be social, give some guys a chance.