If you lie about your hometown, why?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because my home town in a crime filled cess pool and people tend to avoid me if I tell them where I am from when they first meet me. Eventually, once they have gotten to know me, and know I won't cut them, I will talk about it.

Newark?

Compton?

Those are literally the only two cities with nationally recognized negative connotations.

I'm the pp. My hometown has locally recognized negative connotations, particularly in Virginia. It doesn't have to be "national."
When I moved further south or west, it wasn't a problem.

When I move to within one or two states near Virginia, it is an issue. Have literally had coworkers refuse to talk to me, because they hated my hometown so much when stationed there. Hint Hint. After I opened up how much I hated it too, we usually became friendly. That's when I learned that it's best not to talk about specifically where I am from until I get to know others better.

I suspect you are projecting.

Haha, no.
Remember when I went to college and was asked at a party where I was from, the two guys my friend and I were flirting with literally laughed in my face, said "I'm sorry," and walked away. That's the first time I realized it was a liability.

Not sure there is as much hate now as there was back in the day. Even when I moved a few states away and was honest with my answer, usually people would honestly say how much they hated living there or being stationed there. Usually I'm not specific, and just say Hampton Roads or Virginia. Those usually have positive responses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because my home town in a crime filled cess pool and people tend to avoid me if I tell them where I am from when they first meet me. Eventually, once they have gotten to know me, and know I won't cut them, I will talk about it.

Newark?

Compton?

Those are literally the only two cities with nationally recognized negative connotations.

I'm the pp. My hometown has locally recognized negative connotations, particularly in Virginia. It doesn't have to be "national."
When I moved further south or west, it wasn't a problem.

When I move to within one or two states near Virginia, it is an issue. Have literally had coworkers refuse to talk to me, because they hated my hometown so much when stationed there. Hint Hint. After I opened up how much I hated it too, we usually became friendly. That's when I learned that it's best not to talk about specifically where I am from until I get to know others better.

I suspect you are projecting.

Haha, no.
Remember when I went to college and was asked at a party where I was from, the two guys my friend and I were flirting with literally laughed in my face, said "I'm sorry," and walked away. That's the first time I realized it was a liability.

Not sure there is as much hate now as there was back in the day. Even when I moved a few states away and was honest with my answer, usually people would honestly say how much they hated living there or being stationed there. Usually I'm not specific, and just say Hampton Roads or Virginia. Those usually have positive responses.

Tell us where it is. Crowd source the 2021 reaction here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because my home town in a crime filled cess pool and people tend to avoid me if I tell them where I am from when they first meet me. Eventually, once they have gotten to know me, and know I won't cut them, I will talk about it.

Newark?

Compton?

Those are literally the only two cities with nationally recognized negative connotations.

I'm the pp. My hometown has locally recognized negative connotations, particularly in Virginia. It doesn't have to be "national."
When I moved further south or west, it wasn't a problem.

When I move to within one or two states near Virginia, it is an issue. Have literally had coworkers refuse to talk to me, because they hated my hometown so much when stationed there. Hint Hint. After I opened up how much I hated it too, we usually became friendly. That's when I learned that it's best not to talk about specifically where I am from until I get to know others better.

I suspect you are projecting.

Haha, no.
Remember when I went to college and was asked at a party where I was from, the two guys my friend and I were flirting with literally laughed in my face, said "I'm sorry," and walked away. That's the first time I realized it was a liability.

Not sure there is as much hate now as there was back in the day. Even when I moved a few states away and was honest with my answer, usually people would honestly say how much they hated living there or being stationed there. Usually I'm not specific, and just say Hampton Roads or Virginia. Those usually have positive responses.

Tell us where it is. Crowd source the 2021 reaction here.

I will guess Norfolk, VA

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because my home town in a crime filled cess pool and people tend to avoid me if I tell them where I am from when they first meet me. Eventually, once they have gotten to know me, and know I won't cut them, I will talk about it.

Newark?

Compton?

Those are literally the only two cities with nationally recognized negative connotations.

I'm the pp. My hometown has locally recognized negative connotations, particularly in Virginia. It doesn't have to be "national."
When I moved further south or west, it wasn't a problem.

When I move to within one or two states near Virginia, it is an issue. Have literally had coworkers refuse to talk to me, because they hated my hometown so much when stationed there. Hint Hint. After I opened up how much I hated it too, we usually became friendly. That's when I learned that it's best not to talk about specifically where I am from until I get to know others better.

I suspect you are projecting.

Haha, no.
Remember when I went to college and was asked at a party where I was from, the two guys my friend and I were flirting with literally laughed in my face, said "I'm sorry," and walked away. That's the first time I realized it was a liability.

Not sure there is as much hate now as there was back in the day. Even when I moved a few states away and was honest with my answer, usually people would honestly say how much they hated living there or being stationed there. Usually I'm not specific, and just say Hampton Roads or Virginia. Those usually have positive responses.

Tell us where it is. Crowd source the 2021 reaction here.

I will guess Norfolk, VA

That or Newport News. It's like saying Lorton. People believe there is still a prison there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because my home town in a crime filled cess pool and people tend to avoid me if I tell them where I am from when they first meet me. Eventually, once they have gotten to know me, and know I won't cut them, I will talk about it.

Newark?

Compton?

Those are literally the only two cities with nationally recognized negative connotations.

I'm the pp. My hometown has locally recognized negative connotations, particularly in Virginia. It doesn't have to be "national."
When I moved further south or west, it wasn't a problem.

When I move to within one or two states near Virginia, it is an issue. Have literally had coworkers refuse to talk to me, because they hated my hometown so much when stationed there. Hint Hint. After I opened up how much I hated it too, we usually became friendly. That's when I learned that it's best not to talk about specifically where I am from until I get to know others better.

I suspect you are projecting.

Haha, no.
Remember when I went to college and was asked at a party where I was from, the two guys my friend and I were flirting with literally laughed in my face, said "I'm sorry," and walked away. That's the first time I realized it was a liability.

Not sure there is as much hate now as there was back in the day. Even when I moved a few states away and was honest with my answer, usually people would honestly say how much they hated living there or being stationed there. Usually I'm not specific, and just say Hampton Roads or Virginia. Those usually have positive responses.

Tell us where it is. Crowd source the 2021 reaction here.

I will guess Norfolk, VA

That or Newport News. It's like saying Lorton. People believe there is still a prison there.

Pretty close
It's Portsmouth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Where are you from is different from where were you born/hometown.

When I’m asked that while on vacation or sitting in a cab on a business trip, I say, “I’m from DC” (where I live).

If I’m asked in a setting where we’re having a longer conversation/getting to know each other, I say, “I grew up in X, and I’ve been living in DC for 20 years.”

Nonetheless, I know what you’re saying, OP. And, New Yorkers are the worst.

We were on vacation with friends from college, and the cab driver asked us where we were from. A pal said he was from NY, and another pal said, “Whatever, Dave. You just moved to NY and you’ve been there for like 5 minutes. You aren’t a New Yorker yet.”

So true. People who moved to New York at 25 and lived there for 5 years will forever more call themselves a "new yorker" and identify it for life. I guess it's wishful thinking that that becomes part of your identity

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hate the question Where Are You From. As an Asian American growing up in the 70s and 80s it was a poorly phrased ignorant way of asking What Is Your Ethnicity? I would answer the question ‘I grew up in a small suburb outside Boston’. And the uncultured pasty white person would say No Where are you FROM FROM?? Still get it today from the same kind of people.

Being of a particular ethnicity myself, I used to get this question a lot too. I know academia now considers it a microagression. But I personally do not. I appreciate that people are interested in my heritage or to learn about me.

Exactly.

Would you prefer people make assumptions?

Would you prefer people not care or acknowledge?

I live in MoCo where we have a very diverse Spanish speaking population. I hate it when people assume we have lots of Mexicans living here. Guess what? We don’t. We have newly arrived immigrants from dozens of Spanish speaking countries alongside first generation, second generation, etc.

I hope we can move away from this micro aggression stuff and determine how to have polite, friendly conversations about such stuff. Right now, it feels like we can’t ask.

Bold above is racist.

Why is this racist. They didn't say all whites are uncultured.

Also---you can't be racist against whites because racism has the element of a power structure within society behind it. Prejudiced against whites, sure. Not racist.

Nope. Describing any race by their skin color is racist. Try that sentence out with another color inserted and see how that reads.

[Anonymous]

I moved around a bit when I was younger. I usually say I am from NY but I lived in PA when I was very young. I live in DC now (NOVA).

When we vacation, if someone asks me where I am from, I say I am from DC, VA or suburbs of DC. How is that lying?

Half the time, people may ask me where I am really from since I am Asian.

Anyone who knows me a little bit knows I am from NY. People who know me well may know that I loved from PA to NY as a child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I moved around a bit when I was younger. I usually say I am from NY but I lived in PA when I was very young. I live in DC now (NOVA).

When we vacation, if someone asks me where I am from, I say I am from DC, VA or suburbs of DC. How is that lying?

Half the time, people may ask me where I am really from since I am Asian.

Anyone who knows me a little bit knows I am from NY. People who know me well may know that I loved from PA to NY as a child.

I believe OP qualified that they were talking about people who would they were from the place they'd moved to WHILE being there, aka not on vacation.

[Anonymous]

I generally say Uranus. That shuts them up quick.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I generally say Uranus. That shuts them up quick.

I'm sure many of your social interactions end quite early.

[Anonymous]

If you are asking this question, you probably just met. It may be an ice breaker.

Maybe they identify with where they live now. Maybe they had a painful childhood they want to not talk about.

I have a few friends who now live in the east coast but all used to live on the west coast before moving here.

One friend moved to the dc area from California. I have another friend who seems almost offended that this woman says she is from California even though she grew up and went to college in the Midwest. She worked in California, got married in California and California was her home for many years before moving to dc. The other ca friend is a native of California, was born there, grew up there, went to college, worked, married, had kid and moved to dc.

I have another friend whose parents went through an ugly divorce. Every time I talk to her she said she was from another place. I didn’t think anything of it because I also moved around a few states when I was a child. When I got to know her better, I realized she had a very complicated childhood including living with grandparents, having a parent “take” her, changing her name (immigration), moving within the US, etc. it would probably be easier to just say she is from Maryland, especially to a person she just met in casual conversation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you are asking this question, you probably just met. It may be an ice breaker.

Maybe they identify with where they live now. Maybe they had a painful childhood they want to not talk about.

I have a few friends who now live in the east coast but all used to live on the west coast before moving here.

One friend moved to the dc area from California. I have another friend who seems almost offended that this woman says she is from California even though she grew up and went to college in the Midwest. She worked in California, got married in California and California was her home for many years before moving to dc. The other ca friend is a native of California, was born there, grew up there, went to college, worked, married, had kid and moved to dc.

I have another friend whose parents went through an ugly divorce. Every time I talk to her she said she was from another place. I didn’t think anything of it because I also moved around a few states when I was a child. When I got to know her better, I realized she had a very complicated childhood including living with grandparents, having a parent “take” her, changing her name (immigration), moving within the US, etc. it would probably be easier to just say she is from Maryland, especially to a person she just met in casual conversation.

Right, or they just don't feel like getting into it. I lived in one place until I was 7, another place thereafter, went to boarding school and college, then my parents moved to a third place. I don't identify with and haven't visited either of the places I lived as a child. There was no drama or anything that would make a good story, but I hate answering this question because it's so boring and meaningless to explain.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you are asking this question, you probably just met. It may be an ice breaker.

Maybe they identify with where they live now. Maybe they had a painful childhood they want to not talk about.

I have a few friends who now live in the east coast but all used to live on the west coast before moving here.

One friend moved to the dc area from California. I have another friend who seems almost offended that this woman says she is from California even though she grew up and went to college in the Midwest. She worked in California, got married in California and California was her home for many years before moving to dc. The other ca friend is a native of California, was born there, grew up there, went to college, worked, married, had kid and moved to dc.

I have another friend whose parents went through an ugly divorce. Every time I talk to her she said she was from another place. I didn’t think anything of it because I also moved around a few states when I was a child. When I got to know her better, I realized she had a very complicated childhood including living with grandparents, having a parent “take” her, changing her name (immigration), moving within the US, etc. it would probably be easier to just say she is from Maryland, especially to a person she just met in casual conversation.

But why is it always the midwesterner moving to california who lies and says they are from california? You never see the californian insisting they grew up in milwaukee after living there a few years. Because want to lie to create an image of themselves that doesn't exist. Like Hilaria (Hilary) claiming to be from Spain. Even spending a lot of time somewhere, does not make you FROM there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do people really do this?

When people ask me where I'm from, usually in a casual setting, I tell them where I grew up. I don't go into an elaborate story about how I was born overseas and immigrated here as a preteen but then grew up in my hometown because I assume people are just making small talk and don't actually care.

A very small subset of people do it, and I find it fascinating. Sometimes I have had to ask a few times to figure out where someone actually grew up. It's strange

And then these loons say you lie. They lack the inability to have any imagination that anyone did anything differently than they did.

I was born in a foreign country, moved to several others, bounced about, in middle school moved to a small city in America. Moved for college and law school. My experience isn’t uncommon and I’m small talk, I say I’m from where I live. Who has this kind of time.