How available should a spouse be by cell phone?

[Anonymous]

My spouse freaks out when I'm not available by phone. Not in a "you're cheating" way, in a "you don't care about me" way, a "you could be dead and I wouldn't know" way. Which I get, but also drives me crazy because sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. Just because I left my phone on mute in my purse by the door while I was in back nursing the baby doesn't mean I don't love you.

how do you handle this in your relationship?

[Anonymous]

When I try to call my DH I expect at least a text letting me know he can't talk. Ever since my dad died very suddenly, I tend to think the worst if I can't get a hold of him. He understands this and respects it.

[Anonymous]

I refuse to be chained to my cell phone. It's for ME. MY use when I need it. It's not so others can reach me whenever THEY want.

I'd be telling your Dh to get over himself. What did people do before the late 90's when they had cell phones? They WAITED.

[Anonymous]

I have found using the "find my friends" app puts my mind at ease when I wonder when my husband is coming home from work

[Anonymous]

Having lived most of my life in the pre cell phone era, the idea that people should be able to reach me all the time creeps me out.

The "find my friends" app creeps me out even more.

But perhaps if I were younger I'd feel different.

[Anonymous]

I am always available for her whenever I can.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have found using the "find my friends" app puts my mind at ease when I wonder when my husband is coming home from work

More info?

[Anonymous]

Can't help but think "why are we paying for this fscking thing???" whenever I call and spouse doesn't answer...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My spouse freaks out when I'm not available by phone. Not in a "you're cheating" way, in a "you don't care about me" way, a "you could be dead and I wouldn't know" way. Which I get, but also drives me crazy because sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. Just because I left my phone on mute in my purse by the door while I was in back nursing the baby doesn't mean I don't love you.

how do you handle this in your relationship?

You sound like my poor sister. Her DH is so insecure that he needs her attention immediately. If she doesn't drop what she's doing to respond to him he'll keep calling. He needs to feel like the most important thing in her world at all times. God love her I don't know how she does it.

As for us - whatever. DH rarely answers his phone at work so if it's pressing I might call and text to get his attention, but I don't usually bother him at work unless I need something specific and if it's an emergency I can call his admin.

[Anonymous]

:15 again - I don't treat my cell phone like an appendage. I have to mute it often and 99% of the time I forget to un-mute it and it stays burried at the bottom of my bag when I'm home. I still have and use a landline.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have found using the "find my friends" app puts my mind at ease when I wonder when my husband is coming home from work

More info?

http://lmgtfy.com/?q=find+my+friends+app

[Anonymous]

I can't imagine living like that. I have a cell phone for work. My DH doesn't have a cell phone. I call him at his office when I need to talk to him or give him information. He does the same, on our house phone. We are not little children who need to know where mommy and daddy are. He can go to the bathroom or to lunch without letting me know his whereabouts. I simply cannot imagine the life some of you lead. A cell phone is a convenience. You are not its slave.

[Anonymous]

As a parent of 3 younger kids, I always have my phone nearby. Calls from school happen. I also have a few rental properties and it has alway been that the shit hits the fan when I have my phone off.

My husband keeps his close too for these reasons. Outside of having kids away from the home or having so responsibility that might require immediate attention, there's no reason to be attached to it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My spouse freaks out when I'm not available by phone. Not in a "you're cheating" way, in a "you don't care about me" way, a "you could be dead and I wouldn't know" way. Which I get, but also drives me crazy because sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. Just because I left my phone on mute in my purse by the door while I was in back nursing the baby doesn't mean I don't love you.

how do you handle this in your relationship?

My wife does this same thing to me, and it's starting to make me angry. Seriously, I got bitched at for not taking my phone with me on a 2 minute trip to drop dd off at a friend's house on the weekend.

It is starting to feel like a demand that I be available at her beck and call, and it annoys me. I'm sure that's not how she feels, but it really does bug me now. It makes me want to leave the phone behind more often out of spite.

[Anonymous]

Heh heh! My DH often forgets his cell phone at home. Even when he carries it to work it often sits in his bag with the ringer muted. He always answers his desk phone at work, but sometimes he's in all-day meetings. We came late to the cell phone age, so he doesn't text much. He is always apologetic if I have been trying to reach him. We don't have kids. I notice the parents at work communicate a lot more with their spouses during the day. We will catch up at lunch with a short phone call, otherwise just meet up at home.
I always carry my phone, since I have a commute and worry about something g happening. His habit used to annoy me, but I have learned to let it go. It's just how he is.