Family Beach House- DS and Friends Using it for Summer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow.

OP here.

So many angry people. Maybe you wouldn't be so angry if you had a beach house?

Anyway, update.

First kids mom has come grovelling back asking over the course of three emails if her kid could please join the beach house. She apologized profusely and claimed she'd been emotional when she sent the email. Answer was "Too bad, so sad"

Three other boys have since come forward asking if they could rent the other bunks in the bunk house and they got into a bidding war- offering $2000 each. DH and BILs said no because of the septic system. I thought they were foolish because for 7k you could almost replace the system which is nearing its end of life anyway.

So- here's the takeaway if you're a mom. Keep your gossipy mouth shut and play nice. Because it will cost your kid socially big time.

This is so funny. The BILs are being silly, I'd certainly take the additional kids and replace the septic system, because this house will be a party house whether or not 2 extra boys are living there over the summer.

My family has a generational lake cottage and if one of the in-laws started wheeling and dealing, angling with the blood relatives to rent it out to college kids so we could use their money to replace the septic, that in-law would be positioning herself within the family as a rather opportunistic individual.

We have a mountain cabin and if one of the in laws took it upon themselves to handle revenue generation and capital improvement projects we’d probably buy them a gift.

[Anonymous]

If I wanted to stay in a cabin in the woods that had no utilities, I'd probably have to pay $10 a night, so for a full summer, $1000 is not unreasonable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids always pay their way. Some of their friend's parents own beach houses and my kids pay, even when not asked, whatever their share would be if they had rented it from a stranger.

How does that work? Your kid walks in with a wad of cash, drops it on the table, and tells their friend's parents that the sum represents the the fair market rental of a room (bunk? shed?) in/near a beach house in that area? Seems like it would be awkward. We have a beach house and would be very taken aback if we invited one of our kids' friends to stay and they tried to pay us rent. An offer to make or buy some dinners and frequent vacuuming would be welcome, but nothing beyond that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Three college aged boys are going to live for free for the summer and your son invited a friend to join them. Of course the implication is that it's free.

Also calling $333/month for a glorified shed with no running water or kitchen "nominal rent" is hilarious. That's highway robbery.

This 1000%

[Anonymous]

OP has basically described a shack on some land that is poorly upkept and the max limit of people staying shouldn't exceed 4. WTF.
This is like those people selling their houses for $100000 over market value because they have the most specialist of all special houses when in reality it is a "before" photo on any DIY show.

No way my kid would pay after being asked to stay somewhere for the summer unless it was presented as "hey, we are staying at A for the summer, would you want to rent a room and join?"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't get the hang up about sleeping in an AC'd shed with electricity and bunk beds. Is it really that different at the end of the night to walk to that instead of a room down the hall? All the boys will use the same bathrooms and kitchen so their experiences are identical except for the walk to their bed. What's the problem?

A shed doesn’t have isolation nor the same building standards of an inhabitable space. It’s a storage shed rugged with some wiring for an overhead lightbulb and they threw in a window unit to make it seem fancy. It’s not a tiny home. They are expecting the shed kid to pay the utilities for the entire household, and that’s not ok.

[Anonymous]

*insulation*

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't get the hang up about sleeping in an AC'd shed with electricity and bunk beds. Is it really that different at the end of the night to walk to that instead of a room down the hall? All the boys will use the same bathrooms and kitchen so their experiences are identical except for the walk to their bed. What's the problem?

A shed doesn’t have isolation nor the same building standards of an inhabitable space. It’s a storage shed rugged with some wiring for an overhead lightbulb and they threw in a window unit to make it seem fancy. It’s not a tiny home. They are expecting the shed kid to pay the utilities for the entire household, and that’s not ok.

He is free to decline the offer/ invite. Sadly it was his mom who did it for him ending his summer dream of staying at the beach with friends. They asked for a nominal rent from a non family member. The rest of the family who BTW own the home pay plenty to maintain it. Lots of entitled free loaders on this thread.

[Anonymous]

....
There is an extremely basic 'outbuilding' on the property. Think glorified shed. It has no bathroom, running water or kitchen. It's basically a simple bunk room with lights and a window AC that we have used as overflow bedrooms during family vacations.....
It’s a bunk room with AC and electricity on the property. Reading comprehension people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't get the hang up about sleeping in an AC'd shed with electricity and bunk beds. Is it really that different at the end of the night to walk to that instead of a room down the hall? All the boys will use the same bathrooms and kitchen so their experiences are identical except for the walk to their bed. What's the problem?

A shed doesn’t have isolation nor the same building standards of an inhabitable space. It’s a storage shed rugged with some wiring for an overhead lightbulb and they threw in a window unit to make it seem fancy. It’s not a tiny home. They are expecting the shed kid to pay the utilities for the entire household, and that’s not ok.

Oh, you've seen OP's bunkhouse? You sure seem to think you know what it looks like.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH's family has a really special, small beach house on the coast of North Carolina. It's old, small (3 beds, 1.5 baths), on a beautiful piece of property and just something you dream of owning. It's been in his family for three generations.

This summer our college-age DS and two of his male cousins are going to live and work at the beach. They will live in the house.

There is an extremely basic 'outbuilding' on the property. Think glorified shed. It has no bathroom, running water or kitchen. It's basically a simple bunk room with lights and a window AC that we have used as overflow bedrooms during family vacations.

One of many of DS's DC friends wants to live there for the summer. My BILs signed off on it but want to charge a nominal $333 a month rent ($1000 for the summer) and limit it to one kid because they will all being using one septic tank. They also want the chosen kid to sign a basic lease to cover damages.

So, I brought this up to the chosen boy's mom- who I'm very friendly with but not close close.

I thought she was going to faint. Her reaction was one of disgust. She actually thought her son was going to live rent free at out family beach house for three months.

Today I heard she was bad mouthing me to other friends, calling me a cheap skate, etc.

Do I go ballistic and dis-invite the kid?

Really special? GMAF break.

You sound like a complete piece work. Your son must be (should be) mortified that you're trying to charge a friend he invited rent to live in a shack. I probably wouldn't have bothered sh!t talking behind your back, I would have just told you to shove it.

Good grief.

OP here. Found the scum. Sorry you can't appreciate gorgeous acreage and historic property on the coast of NC. Too bad so sad you were raised broke (and probably in a trailer.)

This is absolutely classic because it's not even your house, it's your husband's family's house. I am dying at you trying to act to the manor born over marrying someone with a 1/12th ownership interest in a 3/1.5 with an air conditioned shed.

This. From OP’s description, it’s tiny and run down. But in the vicinity of wealthy people, which is enough for OP.

Wrong. The OP described a lovely beach house that is the thing that people dream of owning. Did you even read the thread?

The only updates in the thread are that the house is poorly maintained and the septic tank is at its absolute limit with 4 occupants. The fact that it sits on acreage is the only thing she's said that sounds nice about it.

"My DH's family has a really special, small beach house on the coast of North Carolina. It's old, small (3 beds, 1.5 baths), on a beautiful piece of property and just something you dream of owning"

What part told you it was run down? The "really special" part or the "something you dream of owning" part? You stink of jealousy.

And for anybody prattling on about the septic tank you obviously don't know sh*t (pun intended) about them. They are rated on the number of bedrooms a home has and they have to perc (or slowly drain) at a certain rate. This is difficult to balance in low lying, sandy soil so it is an issue whether the house is a 5 million dollar mansion or a one room shack. Really, your ignorance is embarrassing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH's family has a really special, small beach house on the coast of North Carolina. It's old, small (3 beds, 1.5 baths), on a beautiful piece of property and just something you dream of owning. It's been in his family for three generations.

This summer our college-age DS and two of his male cousins are going to live and work at the beach. They will live in the house.

There is an extremely basic 'outbuilding' on the property. Think glorified shed. It has no bathroom, running water or kitchen. It's basically a simple bunk room with lights and a window AC that we have used as overflow bedrooms during family vacations.

One of many of DS's DC friends wants to live there for the summer. My BILs signed off on it but want to charge a nominal $333 a month rent ($1000 for the summer) and limit it to one kid because they will all being using one septic tank. They also want the chosen kid to sign a basic lease to cover damages.

So, I brought this up to the chosen boy's mom- who I'm very friendly with but not close close.

I thought she was going to faint. Her reaction was one of disgust. She actually thought her son was going to live rent free at out family beach house for three months.

Today I heard she was bad mouthing me to other friends, calling me a cheap skate, etc.

Do I go ballistic and dis-invite the kid?

Really special? GMAF break.

You sound like a complete piece work. Your son must be (should be) mortified that you're trying to charge a friend he invited rent to live in a shack. I probably wouldn't have bothered sh!t talking behind your back, I would have just told you to shove it.

Good grief.

OP here. Found the scum. Sorry you can't appreciate gorgeous acreage and historic property on the coast of NC. Too bad so sad you were raised broke (and probably in a trailer.)

This is absolutely classic because it's not even your house, it's your husband's family's house. I am dying at you trying to act to the manor born over marrying someone with a 1/12th ownership interest in a 3/1.5 with an air conditioned shed.

This. From OP’s description, it’s tiny and run down. But in the vicinity of wealthy people, which is enough for OP.

Wrong. The OP described a lovely beach house that is the thing that people dream of owning. Did you even read the thread?

The only updates in the thread are that the house is poorly maintained and the septic tank is at its absolute limit with 4 occupants. The fact that it sits on acreage is the only thing she's said that sounds nice about it.

"My DH's family has a really special, small beach house on the coast of North Carolina. It's old, small (3 beds, 1.5 baths), on a beautiful piece of property and just something you dream of owning"

What part told you it was run down? The "really special" part or the "something you dream of owning" part? You stink of jealousy.

And for anybody prattling on about the septic tank you obviously don't know sh*t (pun intended) about them. They are rated on the number of bedrooms a home has and they have to perc (or slowly drain) at a certain rate. This is difficult to balance in low lying, sandy soil so it is an issue whether the house is a 5 million dollar mansion or a one room shack. Really, your ignorance is embarrassing.

What you've just quoted wasn't an update. That was from the first post. OP has come back several times to say that the reason they're charging this kid is because the house needs maintenance, they believe having a fourth person might overload the septic tank, etc. She said very recently that she was pushing to add additional renters this summer and use the income for deferred maintenance. Again, all of this is in updates in the thread. She called it small but special in the OP. The only update that she has posted since the OP that sounded remotely nice is that she added there is acreage. Acreage on the coast is worth something. The house doesn't sound special or nice at all.

[Anonymous]

$1000 isn't going to make a difference to your septic tank if its close enough to failing that 1 extra person (who is out working all day) is going to break it.

One must always look at the marginal cost vs. gain in any situation. Lets say you rented it out all summer to strangers. it sounds like a bit of a cr&phole but you could get, what, $2500/month for it? So you'd get $7500 for the summer. Since the youngsters will be living there, you're already giving up $7500. Taking his grand means you're giving up $6500. Is this marginal amount worth you acting totally unclassy and cheap?

[Anonymous]

Luckily the kid and his mother are not staying there. So it doesn’t matter what condition the home is in. It was an offer. It was declined. Someone else made a difference decision. ALL beach homes require a lot of upkeep.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH's family has a really special, small beach house on the coast of North Carolina. It's old, small (3 beds, 1.5 baths), on a beautiful piece of property and just something you dream of owning. It's been in his family for three generations.

This summer our college-age DS and two of his male cousins are going to live and work at the beach. They will live in the house.

There is an extremely basic 'outbuilding' on the property. Think glorified shed. It has no bathroom, running water or kitchen. It's basically a simple bunk room with lights and a window AC that we have used as overflow bedrooms during family vacations.

One of many of DS's DC friends wants to live there for the summer. My BILs signed off on it but want to charge a nominal $333 a month rent ($1000 for the summer) and limit it to one kid because they will all being using one septic tank. They also want the chosen kid to sign a basic lease to cover damages.

So, I brought this up to the chosen boy's mom- who I'm very friendly with but not close close.

I thought she was going to faint. Her reaction was one of disgust. She actually thought her son was going to live rent free at out family beach house for three months.

Today I heard she was bad mouthing me to other friends, calling me a cheap skate, etc.

Do I go ballistic and dis-invite the kid?

Really special? GMAF break.

You sound like a complete piece work. Your son must be (should be) mortified that you're trying to charge a friend he invited rent to live in a shack. I probably wouldn't have bothered sh!t talking behind your back, I would have just told you to shove it.

Good grief.

OP here. Found the scum. Sorry you can't appreciate gorgeous acreage and historic property on the coast of NC. Too bad so sad you were raised broke (and probably in a trailer.)

This is absolutely classic because it's not even your house, it's your husband's family's house. I am dying at you trying to act to the manor born over marrying someone with a 1/12th ownership interest in a 3/1.5 with an air conditioned shed.

This. From OP’s description, it’s tiny and run down. But in the vicinity of wealthy people, which is enough for OP.

Wrong. The OP described a lovely beach house that is the thing that people dream of owning. Did you even read the thread?

The only updates in the thread are that the house is poorly maintained and the septic tank is at its absolute limit with 4 occupants. The fact that it sits on acreage is the only thing she's said that sounds nice about it.

"My DH's family has a really special, small beach house on the coast of North Carolina. It's old, small (3 beds, 1.5 baths), on a beautiful piece of property and just something you dream of owning"

What part told you it was run down? The "really special" part or the "something you dream of owning" part? You stink of jealousy.

And for anybody prattling on about the septic tank you obviously don't know sh*t (pun intended) about them. They are rated on the number of bedrooms a home has and they have to perc (or slowly drain) at a certain rate. This is difficult to balance in low lying, sandy soil so it is an issue whether the house is a 5 million dollar mansion or a one room shack. Really, your ignorance is embarrassing.

What you've just quoted wasn't an update. That was from the first post. OP has come back several times to say that the reason they're charging this kid is because the house needs maintenance, they believe having a fourth person might overload the septic tank, etc. She said very recently that she was pushing to add additional renters this summer and use the income for deferred maintenance. Again, all of this is in updates in the thread. She called it small but special in the OP. The only update that she has posted since the OP that sounded remotely nice is that she added there is acreage. Acreage on the coast is worth something. The house doesn't sound special or nice at all.

This is rich. This poster is claiming a house she hasn't even seen isn't special or nice, despite the owner of the house describing it precisely as special and nice

Nowhere did she say the home needed lots of maintenance. She made a comment about the septic tank and that was explained by the very post you quoted but you failed to grasp it. Septic tanks are rated for bedrooms- so if you have a 4 bedroom house, its unwise to have more than 4 people using the bathrooms and kitchen.

She made no mention of painting or window replacements or redoing the roof or fixing rot or landscaping or... anything related to maintenance.

Each post just makes you look more and more jealous.