Family Beach House- DS and Friends Using it for Summer.

[Anonymous]

My DH's family has a really special, small beach house on the coast of North Carolina. It's old, small (3 beds, 1.5 baths), on a beautiful piece of property and just something you dream of owning. It's been in his family for three generations.

This summer our college-age DS and two of his male cousins are going to live and work at the beach. They will live in the house.

There is an extremely basic 'outbuilding' on the property. Think glorified shed. It has no bathroom, running water or kitchen. It's basically a simple bunk room with lights and a window AC that we have used as overflow bedrooms during family vacations.

One of many of DS's DC friends wants to live there for the summer. My BILs signed off on it but want to charge a nominal $333 a month rent ($1000 for the summer) and limit it to one kid because they will all being using one septic tank. They also want the chosen kid to sign a basic lease to cover damages.

So, I brought this up to the chosen boy's mom- who I'm very friendly with but not close close.

I thought she was going to faint. Her reaction was one of disgust. She actually thought her son was going to live rent free at out family beach house for three months.

Today I heard she was bad mouthing me to other friends, calling me a cheap skate, etc.

Do I go ballistic and dis-invite the kid?

[Anonymous]

Three college aged boys are going to live for free for the summer and your son invited a friend to join them. Of course the implication is that it's free.

Also calling $333/month for a glorified shed with no running water or kitchen "nominal rent" is hilarious. That's highway robbery.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DH's family has a really special, small beach house on the coast of North Carolina. It's old, small (3 beds, 1.5 baths), on a beautiful piece of property and just something you dream of owning. It's been in his family for three generations.

This summer our college-age DS and two of his male cousins are going to live and work at the beach. They will live in the house.

There is an extremely basic 'outbuilding' on the property. Think glorified shed. It has no bathroom, running water or kitchen. It's basically a simple bunk room with lights and a window AC that we have used as overflow bedrooms during family vacations.

One of many of DS's DC friends wants to live there for the summer. My BILs signed off on it but want to charge a nominal $333 a month rent ($1000 for the summer) and limit it to one kid because they will all being using one septic tank. They also want the chosen kid to sign a basic lease to cover damages.

So, I brought this up to the chosen boy's mom- who I'm very friendly with but not close close.

I thought she was going to faint. Her reaction was one of disgust. She actually thought her son was going to live rent free at out family beach house for three months.

Today I heard she was bad mouthing me to other friends, calling me a cheap skate, etc.

Do I go ballistic and dis-invite the kid?

I would. Just tell her the extended family changed their mind. She sounds like PITA who would never pay for damage her kid inflicts. But honestly the whole thing sounds like a terrible idea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Three college aged boys are going to live for free for the summer and your son invited a friend to join them. Of course the implication is that it's free.

Also calling $333/month for a glorified shed with no running water or kitchen "nominal rent" is hilarious. That's highway robbery.

OP here. The friend would use the kitchen, baths, electricity, water, and gas like all the others and undoubtedly hang out in the house all the time he wasn't sleeping. The other boys are living for free because... their family owns the house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Three college aged boys are going to live for free for the summer and your son invited a friend to join them. Of course the implication is that it's free.

Also calling $333/month for a glorified shed with no running water or kitchen "nominal rent" is hilarious. That's highway robbery.

OP here. The friend would use the kitchen, baths, electricity, water, and gas like all the others and undoubtedly hang out in the house all the time he wasn't sleeping. The other boys are living for free because... their family owns the house.

You're charging him to camp. And no kidding their family owns the house. It doesn't change the fact that your son invited this kid under the implication he would be joining them in their fun "we have somewhere to stay" summer and it would be free and now you're trying to make a buck.

[Anonymous]

It's not the kid's fault he's in this weird situation. Just move forward with the original plan and shrug your shoulders for anyone who doesn't comply.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Three college aged boys are going to live for free for the summer and your son invited a friend to join them. Of course the implication is that it's free.

Also calling $333/month for a glorified shed with no running water or kitchen "nominal rent" is hilarious. That's highway robbery.

OP here. The friend would use the kitchen, baths, electricity, water, and gas like all the others and undoubtedly hang out in the house all the time he wasn't sleeping. The other boys are living for free because... their family owns the house.

You're charging him to camp. And no kidding their family owns the house. It doesn't change the fact that your son invited this kid under the implication he would be joining them in their fun "we have somewhere to stay" summer and it would be free and now you're trying to make a buck.

You have no idea what the invitation was or any implications attached. Stick to the facts or back out. Last time I checked, camping didn't have bathrooms and AC. Or a stove. Or hot water.

I'd yank the invite just because she was sh*t talking you. What an ingrate.

[Anonymous]

It’s weird because the friend was invited and THEN asked to pay rent. If your son already invited him giving the impression he could live for free I’d look weird at you too.

[Anonymous]

Huh? Why shouldn’t he have to pay something? That’s a great rent for summer at the beach! His mom sounds awful and like a freeloader.

[Anonymous]

Did the kid ask to stay or was he invited?

[Anonymous]

I get it op. I think the basic ideas are good, but the reality and implementation is much harder. I think the rent is too high (though of course it is not market rate). And while I think the lease idea is good, any damages, etc would be too easy to shrug off as one of the other boys did it. Or the family kids could point fingers at the non family kid. I just think this is too inherently risky to proceed.

[Anonymous]

I love this post. Who gets the rent money? I understand the concern about damage. How about a refundable security deposit rather than rent.

[Anonymous]

I think it's tacky to charge him rent in this situation. I'd ask that all the boys do a certain group of chores and tasks - mow the lawn, paint the shed, etc.

And $1000 for a college kid is not a nominal amount.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Three college aged boys are going to live for free for the summer and your son invited a friend to join them. Of course the implication is that it's free.

Also calling $333/month for a glorified shed with no running water or kitchen "nominal rent" is hilarious. That's highway robbery.

OP here. The friend would use the kitchen, baths, electricity, water, and gas like all the others and undoubtedly hang out in the house all the time he wasn't sleeping. The other boys are living for free because... their family owns the house.

Eye roll? I imagine that other lady is giving you and eye roll and much more!

Do you really think the marginal cost of that boy staying in the bunk shed is $1000 for the summer? Is this your son's good friend? And why do your charge him unless DH's family is that hard up for $$??
What does DS think?

I would have been mortified if my parents did this to a friend of mine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's not the kid's fault he's in this weird situation. Just move forward with the original plan and shrug your shoulders for anyone who doesn't comply.

And if she does, DS may lose "one of his many DC friends."