NYT: Men where have you gone, please come back.

[Anonymous]

I’ve never been overly attractive but before getting married I had very little trouble going on dates and meeting girls.

Maybe the real problem is that the kids all sit at home, never working from the office, popping gummies and scrolling on Instagram with a smug sense of superiority that they don’t poison themselves at happy hour and resisting ever sitting in an office?

My entire circle of friends 20 years ago were high school and college friends and friends of friends of friends and friends of friends of friends.

Have people ever considered not being social recluses and taking the lazy way out by swiping left and right? People must still have real live friends in person, right?

Sure, maybe I shouldn’t have had a few month long benders. But I sure didn’t lack for friends. Certainly never felt like I needed to go to Colombia for female attention.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve never been overly attractive but before getting married I had very little trouble going on dates and meeting girls.

Maybe the real problem is that the kids all sit at home, never working from the office, popping gummies and scrolling on Instagram with a smug sense of superiority that they don’t poison themselves at happy hour and resisting ever sitting in an office?

My entire circle of friends 20 years ago were high school and college friends and friends of friends of friends and friends of friends of friends.

Have people ever considered not being social recluses and taking the lazy way out by swiping left and right? People must still have real live friends in person, right?

Sure, maybe I shouldn’t have had a few month long benders. But I sure didn’t lack for friends. Certainly never felt like I needed to go to Colombia for female attention.

Good point about getting off your ass but the reality is that it's very difficult to meet people in the US compared to other countries like Colombia. Most guys can get women here but why bother when you can do 10x better somewhere else? You should give it a shot. I've never met a guy who spent any time down there who prefers American women, but to each their own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Maybe the real problem is that the kids all sit at home, never working from the office, popping gummies and scrolling on Instagram with a smug sense of superiority that they don’t poison themselves at happy hour and resisting ever sitting in an office?

My entire circle of friends 20 years ago were high school and college friends and friends of friends of friends and friends of friends of friends.

Have people ever considered not being social recluses and taking the lazy way out by swiping left and right? People must still have real live friends in person, right?

There we go. The cheap generational shot. Stay classy, Boomer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve never been overly attractive but before getting married I had very little trouble going on dates and meeting girls.

Maybe the real problem is that the kids all sit at home, never working from the office, popping gummies and scrolling on Instagram with a smug sense of superiority that they don’t poison themselves at happy hour and resisting ever sitting in an office?

My entire circle of friends 20 years ago were high school and college friends and friends of friends of friends and friends of friends of friends.

Have people ever considered not being social recluses and taking the lazy way out by swiping left and right? People must still have real live friends in person, right?

Sure, maybe I shouldn’t have had a few month long benders. But I sure didn’t lack for friends. Certainly never felt like I needed to go to Colombia for female attention.

Good point about getting off your ass but the reality is that it's very difficult to meet people in the US compared to other countries like Colombia. Most guys can get women here but why bother when you can do 10x better somewhere else? You should give it a shot. I've never met a guy who spent any time down there who prefers American women, but to each their own.

Right? Why bother putting in any effort when you can be lazy and put little effort getting a desperate woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well women are fatter then ever, highest body counts, entitlement and don't care for long lasting relatioships. They'll destroy a family for thier happiness and have no repsect. The juice isn't worth the squeeze. Many of us work and do as we please. Make women marriage material instead of whores again. We also have very little debt compared to women. We'll pass or passport.

Yep and thanks to feminism, women are now giving it away for free and calling it "sexual empowerment". Now you can just bang them with no commitment when before you had to get in a relationship to get the good stuff. That was the only reason guys would put up with their BS, now that it's so easy to get laid, why would any guy commit and have to deal with all that attitude?

I've worked for the last 5 years in one of the aforementioned countries, and I would say that there are all types. Most of the guys coming to party here are mostly normal (some bang prostitutes and others hook up with low quality women on tinder) and are likely banging American women when not traveling.

The are also some stereotypical passport bros who probably couldn't date quality, educated women in the US. Not even sure how they can afford to travel lol.

Normal guys like digital nomads and retirees here generally don't get involved in those shenanigans. If you focus on meeting women outside of apps and seek out professional, educated women, you will do MUCH better than dating in the US.

Because they are traveling to cheap places where women are more desperate. Easy pickings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well women are fatter then ever, highest body counts, entitlement and don't care for long lasting relatioships. They'll destroy a family for thier happiness and have no repsect. The juice isn't worth the squeeze. Many of us work and do as we please. Make women marriage material instead of whores again. We also have very little debt compared to women. We'll pass or passport.

What have you done for your love life? I don’t see many fat women in my social circle. What are you up to?

I am in Ocean City MD right now, and definitely a lot of fat women, especially 35+. And they’re all tatted up also. Not a good combination, fat and tattoos. I really don’t get the Tats, that sh*t is expensive, and looks terrible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve never been overly attractive but before getting married I had very little trouble going on dates and meeting girls.

Maybe the real problem is that the kids all sit at home, never working from the office, popping gummies and scrolling on Instagram with a smug sense of superiority that they don’t poison themselves at happy hour and resisting ever sitting in an office?

My entire circle of friends 20 years ago were high school and college friends and friends of friends of friends and friends of friends of friends.

Have people ever considered not being social recluses and taking the lazy way out by swiping left and right? People must still have real live friends in person, right?

Sure, maybe I shouldn’t have had a few month long benders. But I sure didn’t lack for friends. Certainly never felt like I needed to go to Colombia for female attention.

Good point about getting off your ass but the reality is that it's very difficult to meet people in the US compared to other countries like Colombia. Most guys can get women here but why bother when you can do 10x better somewhere else? You should give it a shot. I've never met a guy who spent any time down there who prefers American women, but to each their own.

Right? Why bother putting in any effort when you can be lazy and put little effort getting a desperate woman.

You don't get it. Every single guy who has the option will date women from countries like Colombia or Brazil. Lots of educated and professional women of all ages. Maybe you should ask why men don't want you? But instead you're triggered lmao

[Anonymous]

Sorry, we're too busy not reading novels.

https://www.nytimes.com/2025/06/25/style/fiction-books-men-reading.html

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men found a solution to their problems. They either left women alone and retreated from the dating world altogether or they got a passport and went abroad to find the women they liked. American women, especially those in the academic and business fields, seem angry and embittered. They always complain men are going to Asia and South America for sex and subservient low educated women. But you almost never see American women in large numbers with foreign men who are hotter, more educated, and have higher incomes than American men. On paper, alot of European men match the qualifications and beliefs American women are looking for. Several off the bat I can name from Sweden, Switzerland, Norway that match the average progressive female. The truth is that those men don't want them either. And a degree and career is not a factor of attraction with most men. It's about your looks, femininity, humility and kindness, and maternal qualities. Younger women, especially those abroad, tend to have these factors in spades without the combative and propagandized nature of an older, educated, professional woman.

+1

Nailed it. The only thing women in the US really have going for them is that they have a captive audience. Most guys simply don't have the resources to live abroad. And the triggered feminists respond with hate and discontent, so predictable.

Living abroad in many of these places is dirt cheap. If you dont have the resources to live in Colombia or Thailand..then even those poor 3rd world women won’t give you the time of day.

It’s still an option for men who can’t get women but quickly losing its benefits as these places have picked up on the LBH phenomenon.

Whats the LBH phenomenon?

Loser Back Home
aka, they know they can't score "back home" so they have to go to a third world country where they can be seen as slightly better than the local men because they have american money. Previous generations were less aware of this, but now with the internet, even the women in third world countries know these guys are major losers who are just trying to buy cheap pu$$y.

I've never seen anyone so upset that some guys are hooking up with women in another country.

I feel sorry for any man or woman who has to be around you nasty ol' thang.

White lotus was all over this theme.

Even Luigi Mangione was repulsed in Bangkok.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve never been overly attractive but before getting married I had very little trouble going on dates and meeting girls.

Maybe the real problem is that the kids all sit at home, never working from the office, popping gummies and scrolling on Instagram with a smug sense of superiority that they don’t poison themselves at happy hour and resisting ever sitting in an office?

My entire circle of friends 20 years ago were high school and college friends and friends of friends of friends and friends of friends of friends.

Have people ever considered not being social recluses and taking the lazy way out by swiping left and right? People must still have real live friends in person, right?

Sure, maybe I shouldn’t have had a few month long benders. But I sure didn’t lack for friends. Certainly never felt like I needed to go to Colombia for female attention.

Good point about getting off your ass but the reality is that it's very difficult to meet people in the US compared to other countries like Colombia. Most guys can get women here but why bother when you can do 10x better somewhere else? You should give it a shot. I've never met a guy who spent any time down there who prefers American women, but to each their own.

Right? Why bother putting in any effort when you can be lazy and put little effort getting a desperate woman.

You don't get it. Every single guy who has the option will date women from countries like Colombia or Brazil. Lots of educated and professional women of all ages. Maybe you should ask why men don't want you? But instead you're triggered lmao

Don't marry people whose background you don't really know.

[Anonymous]

Mid 40s guy here. I'm have a great wife, kids, all that stuff.

I'm reading through this thread and all the comments just seem like from some alternate, awful, reality. Men and women jabbing at each other over weird stereotypes and generalities.

Do people in general really have it so bad in terms of finding good relationships?

Maybe I live in a bubble, but is seems like there are a lot of normal seemingly successful and happy nuclear families around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mid 40s guy here. I'm have a great wife, kids, all that stuff.

I'm reading through this thread and all the comments just seem like from some alternate, awful, reality. Men and women jabbing at each other over weird stereotypes and generalities.

Do people in general really have it so bad in terms of finding good relationships?

Maybe I live in a bubble, but is seems like there are a lot of normal seemingly successful and happy nuclear families around.

So you’re saying you’ve never done the totally normal thing of traveling to South America to pull some strange?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mid 40s guy here. I'm have a great wife, kids, all that stuff.

I'm reading through this thread and all the comments just seem like from some alternate, awful, reality. Men and women jabbing at each other over weird stereotypes and generalities.

Do people in general really have it so bad in terms of finding good relationships?

Maybe I live in a bubble, but is seems like there are a lot of normal seemingly successful and happy nuclear families around.

Right?!?! Married 36 y/o woman here thinking the same!

I do think that constant phone use these days distracts us from making and growing genuine relationships but I know quite a lot of great single and married men and women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I work in tech support with almost 100% of young men and women, and the job pays around 80K/year. The workplace is around 50/50 young men and women. Almost 100% of these women at this workplace don't want to have anything to do with the men here, and they think these guys are "losers" for working in tech support instead of 400K/yr in software engineering jobs. All of these "average" women think they can get a 9 or 10 guys. One of the average women slept with a high-income software sales guy and former D1 athlete, and now she thinks those guys are willing to take her seriously, LOL...

These women are soon going to be the sad 30+ women that post here and are in the dating maker today. They all think they deserve top tier men but bring little or nothing to the table. Then they wonder why they’re single. Men woke up and realized being married to a feminist woman who thinks she is gods gift or always right isn’t worth it. Women on here will continue the lie that women are choosing not to marry but it’s the men. Men have decided modern women and marriage aren’t worth it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Today the average woman wants absolutely nothing to do with the average man. If a man is not at least 6 feet tall & makes at least 6 figures he is almost completely out of the dating pool. Because a male 9 hooked up with her one night because he was drunk & bored a female 4 thinks she is owed a 9 or 10 high value man & will settle for nothing less.

Because of the combination of the IPhone dating apps, social media, the Covid/George Floyd insanity of 2020, & 3rd wave feminism we have a lost generation of women. And the show Sex & the City convinced women they could move to a big city, be boss babes & ride the cock carousel with every man they could & still think high value men would still want to date & marry them. What is going on right now is a ticking time bomb for our society & it’s not going to end well.

You talk about how women want these things, using a scale/rating system men created to objectify women. Sounds like classic "you can dish it out, but can't take it".

When women started working and no longer had to put up with men to survive, they started playing the same games men do, and men lost. Instead of leveling up (e.g. learning some emotional intelligence, how to connect with women as people, etc) men retreated to porn and bro culture and whinged about how women didn't exist solely to please them anymore. They're not wrong now; women exist to please themselves, just like men always have. They were wrong then, when they thought/expected women to cater to them and grew soft and weak while women did all the emotional labor of maintaining relationships. Now, men with atrophied emotional muscle are being tasked with actually connecting with women as humans and, well, y'all suck at it.

Work harder. Suck less.

But they don't. They whine and complain and want to regress (i.e. "make ______ great again" where "great" equals "easier for mediocre men")

You mean men should follow more ridiculous women rules?

Well, you could see it that way. You could also consider why men made such ridiculous rules for women (be a size 2! Be beautiful and quiet! Always laugh at his jokes! Spend your life in servitude and always have a smile!), and that the consequences you're experiencing now are the direct result and backlash against those rules.

And then, you can try to mend the rift by, you know, evolving. Or, you can stay as you are and get left behind. Choices!

+1 c'mon, man, you men want women to:

1. love sex and want it when you want it
2. not gain weight
3. be low maintenance and low drama
4. like to have fun

What exactly are you bringing to the relationship now that women are able to make the same, or in many cases, more than men? Wives are still doing the majority of the housechores, child care, and even elderly care, all while still working FT. What exactly is the man bringing to the relationship here?

Women today want equal partners. If you can't do that, then that could be why you are still single.

BTW, I'm 54 and been married for 20+ years. Not saying our marriage is perfect, but we have tried to be equal partners throughout our marriage. There is no way I would've married a man who did not want to be an equal partner.

So? Women want men to:

1. Be 6ft tall
2. Earn well over the average income.
3. Be well-endowed
4. Have a full head of hair
5. Be fit