Help! My DS is sooo slow at everything.
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Anonymous
| My DS is super slow at everything and he always has been. I ask him to do something and he takes forever. Its so frustrating because I can't rely on him to help me with anything because I could have done it 10 times faster than him. His teachers remark about how slow he is in class and he gets A's and B's right now but he seems like he is falling behind all of the time because he is so slow at finishing his work and tests. I have had teacher conferences but they don't really know what to do other than to practice with him. He is average as far as intelligence but I know he would be way smarter if he would just pay attention and learn to do things more quickly. He is 9 years old and this has been going on since before elementary school but sometimes it just feels like it is only getting worse. I'm extremely busy all of the time and I love him so much but its irritating to say the least that he won't get things done. I have tried rewards and punishments but he just doesn't respond to anything. Cleaning, schoolwork, getting ready in the morning, even for things he is excited for like going to the playground or the amusement park....slow as a snail. I'm worried that as he gets older he will really fall far behind and when it comes time for him to get a job no one will hire him because he can't get work done on time. Please, any help or suggestions would be awesome! |
Anonymous
| Reminds me of my southern relatives. Some of the males speak so slowly that I have to bite my lip to not finish their sentences. Sounds like this may just be who he is. Does he at least get things done correctly the first time, as in excellent attention to detail? |
Anonymous
| Sounds a bit like ADD to me... but others may have better insight. |
Anonymous
|
Sounds like your son and my son might have been separated at birth!
I have no suggestions, just commiseration. Why does this sound like ADD? I think it's more like laziness. |
Anonymous
| Sounds like ADD- inattentive to me. If he is unable to focus on tasks long enough to finish them, that is as warning sign. |
Anonymous
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Because he is getting distracted by other things (actions, thoughts) preventing him from completing the tasks.
"It isn’t that children with ADD/ADHD can’t pay attention: when they’re doing things they enjoy or hearing about topics in which they’re interested, they have no trouble focusing and staying on task. But when the task is repetitive or boring, they quickly tune out." |
Anonymous
Well, then hell, I'm a 40 year old woman who has undiagnosed ADD. |
Anonymous
Ha. Actually, I can tell you that my mother and 2 of my 3 uncles are completely ADD - but untreated or diagnosed and untreated. It has had a terrible impact on their lives. More info: http://www.helpguide.org/mental/adhd_add_signs_symptoms.htm |
Anonymous
My life is actually pretty awesome but, if you bore me, you get nothing from me. Case closed. 
As for my son and OP's son, it could be something like that but I'd like to see if it's something he grows out of. Maturity changes so much. Plus, even though it takes him forever to get prepped for a soccer game, he always wants to be there and early. So, we just get him moving towards his uniform first thing in the morning! |
Anonymous
| Op here. He also has a problem with forgetting. He doesn't listen completely when I ask him to do something he only hears part of what I am saying because he thinks he already knows the rest of what I am going to tell him to do. |
Anonymous
| You need to talk to your pediatrician and share your observations and teachers' feedback. My son showed all these signs and an evaluation concluded ADHD when he was in 3rd grade. You don't say how old your son is. |
Anonymous
That's the impulsivity piece. Again: http://www.helpguide.org/mental/adhd_add_signs_symptoms.htm |
Anonymous
| You have perfectly described my 13-year old ADHD (inattentive type) son with executive function and working memory issues. He has no fast speed, which is terribly frustrating when he is late for school and takes 15 minutes to tie his shoes (you would think a ninth grader would have that skill mastered). |
Anonymous
Yep, mine too, only he's 11. Thing is, I am just thankful that he actually completes things at all. He's rather independent - far more than anyone anticipated by this point. But, he takes forever to do things, even if he doesn't get sidetracked. I just build in extra time for everything and he doesn't get out of chores just because the rest of us can do them faster. |
Anonymous
| Agree that you should at least investigate ADD and/exec functioning before he heads to middle school. If this is just his speed, you will want accommodations in place as the workload increases. Plus you'll have time to help him work out strategies for his own progress. |