When you got married, how much did you really think about marrying into your spouse's family?
Were you happy about joining your spouse's family? Or did you just think that you can be married to your spouse without having to deal with his/her family? |
I didn't think about it as much as I should have. |
Depends on how close they are, both geographically and in life. DH's family is annoying but they live in another state. They don't have much influence over him, and we only see them 1x-2x/year. |
+1. I didn't think about them at all. Knew he had parents but somehow they didn't matter. If I was reliving my life again I would be looking much more closely at the family |
Love FIL, love SIL/BIL/nephew, MIL gives me anxiety and I don't enjoy spending time with her. But, not enough to make me wish I didn't marry DH. I knew I'd have to deal with MIL regularly, but DH is well worth it.
And I'm pretty sure he would say he exact same thing about his in-laws. |
+2 |
+1,000 |
Me too. Also, it's one thing for these nutty people to be your in-laws. When they become your children's grandparents, it's a whole new ball game. I did not think about that at all and really regret it. |
Same |
I thought about it very seriously. One of the most attractive things about my husband was his lack of extended family. I have to deal with his mother and that is really it. He is much older than I am and lived independently from his parents for many years so she doesn't have much influence over him. |
Mostly I thought I got pretty lucky having such nice in-laws. I love my MIL in particular. Am closer to her than my own mother. |
Well MIL doesn't speak to any of her 5 sisters, and after attending a bridal shower that 2 of them were at, I can see why. This was before DH and I were even engaged. I knew MIL had some of her sister in her (mean, spiteful, goes behind people's backs, etc) but DH was well worth having to put up with his mom. There have only been 3 instances (and 1 soon to be one if everything goes as anticipated) and thankfully DH has been on my side for each one and is fully supportive of me and stands up to his mom. If he wasn't like that, I don't know what I would do. |
Reverse. I knew I was marrying the black sheep of the family. Should have thought harder about that, as DH can be difficult to live with sometimes. His family is lovely, especially my MIL. I will be devastated when she leaves us. |
This. His family is tearing us apart. Had I known DH was this tied to his Mommy and afraid of her as a grown man, I'd have thought twice. That and I should have been a bitch from Day One with my MIL to eliminate a power struggle with her. If I'd have put her in her place and not been so focused on making friends with her, perhaps the resulting estrangement would have allowed DH and I to mature as an independent married couple. |
+2 |