Are we ready for the Thanksgiving Vent thread?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This year I have my kids for thanksgiving. I’m not a holiday person, and overall hate cooking and cleaning, so usually for holidays we’ll just go out or get a pizza.

My new BF (who doesn’t have kids) grew up in a very broken family and later on foster care, so my holiday plan troubled him greatly. He likes the idea of the wholesome family during the holidays. So he said I can’t do pizza, don’t worry, he’ll handle thanksgiving dinner.

Then every night this week has talked about how stressed he is trying to plan dinner and asking me a million questions. Should we do ham or turkey? Should we cook or get it catered? Who should we buy it from? What do we do if it isn’t shipped in time?

Finally I was like omg, shut up, I’ll just handle it. So now here I am making a damn thanksgiving dinner I didn’t want to make so my BF can try to heal his childhood trauma.

And yes, I know I did this to myself.

At least on the plus side, I found a recipe for a one sheet pan thanksgiving dinner. So just a matter of sticking things on the pan over 3 hours. Hoping it’s not too difficult.

PP back with an update!

Thanksgiving went well. BF helped out - both with cooking and entertaining the kids. He took them out to the playground, and also made a run back to my house for some things I had forgotten. And he cleaned everything up so overall a very fair exchange, we were both pretty happy.

I *did* have to stop him from making Mac and cheese about 15 minutes before dinner was served. He said he was hungry, so he was going to cook up some Kraft, have a bite, and put it in the fridge before the kids noticed and wanted it instead of dinner. I was like nooooooo sir you will not make that Mac and cheese.

So what was your Thanksgiving meal and you say running back to your house? Where did you end up having Thanksgiving?

We had it at his house! It’s much bigger than mine with a better kitchen and a ton of playground nearby, so we usually go there.

We did regular thanksgiving food - turkey, mashed potatoes, cranberries, stuffing, etc. I found a great one sheet pan recipe, so everything cooked on one pan. Overall pretty easy.

Can you link to the sheet pan recipe? I was skeptical but if it worked out I might try sometime. We didn’t end up with leftovers and I could really go for some stuffing

Here ya go! https://www.anediblemosaic.com/small-thanksgiving-dinner-for-4-made-on-a-sheet-pan/

This sheetpan recipe is more work than just making a few things and buying a few things.

[Anonymous]

I will share the pettiest of my petty vents: my mom asked me not to put bourbon in my pumpkin pie bc she doesn't like the taste. So I made the pie without bourbon. She never even tried the now-bland pumpkin pie and had the key lime. Her comment: well, I guess you put some LIME in this.

Boomers...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Spending time with my mom is like being cross-examined. She asks question after question after question. When I ask about what's going on in her life, she gives one or two word answers. It feels less like a conversation and more like a demand that I entertain her.

Oh I sympathize with you. My mom also fires off questions at her audience but then interrupts with another thought before anyone can answer. And nobody is allowed to change the subject. It's so insufferable that we have to entertain her separately from the rest of the extended family and my ILs. I miss bigger family holidays but nobody else can stand her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My ILs sit in total silence. They speak to no one including their son and grandkids, unkess its answerin a question. Any and all socializing is torture for these people. I am indeed afraid that my kids have inherited this defect and as my husband ages he seems to be getting more like them.
My dad sits in blissful solitude because he "forgot" his hearing aids again.
My mom is telling my ILs various sob stories trying desperately to get a reaction or sympathy out of them. She will get nothing and end up tipsy on my deck, in tears, asking why I married into such a weird family.

They just want to be left alone! Why is your mother torturing them?! She can chit chat with someone else.

Introverted people like being at the fringes of the event, without engaging too much socially.

I would much rather have introverted people as guests than have people who cannot let a silence go unchallenged.

Sorry, that's just weird with FAMILY. I somewhat understand your point in other situations, but this is not normal.

I know it's not normal for you, but it's not something they can control. They're clearly on the autism spectrum.

OK and way to completely miss the point. Not sure how you can tell they are CLEARLY on the spectrum based on that short anecdote. No one is forcing the in laws to be there if they don't want to be. If you agree to the visit, you agree to some actual interaction. Otherwise just stay home (which is fine btw!)

I don't know what it is but something is wrong. I've written here before about how they sat in silence when meeting their first grandchild. They literally had nothing to say.
One of their fathers died a while back. Husband was a pallbearer so I was alone at the grave with a toddler and a baby. With one arm I held the baby, with the other I held up an umbrella in the pouring rain. Toddler was whimpering and ILs just looked daggers at me because the toddler wasnt silent. Not a stranger, but their own grandchild. A random second cousin ended up helping me with the umbrella and was very sweet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My ILs sit in total silence. They speak to no one including their son and grandkids, unkess its answerin a question. Any and all socializing is torture for these people. I am indeed afraid that my kids have inherited this defect and as my husband ages he seems to be getting more like them.
My dad sits in blissful solitude because he "forgot" his hearing aids again.
My mom is telling my ILs various sob stories trying desperately to get a reaction or sympathy out of them. She will get nothing and end up tipsy on my deck, in tears, asking why I married into such a weird family.

They just want to be left alone! Why is your mother torturing them?! She can chit chat with someone else.

Introverted people like being at the fringes of the event, without engaging too much socially.

I would much rather have introverted people as guests than have people who cannot let a silence go unchallenged.

Sorry, that's just weird with FAMILY. I somewhat understand your point in other situations, but this is not normal.

I know it's not normal for you, but it's not something they can control. They're clearly on the autism spectrum.

OK and way to completely miss the point. Not sure how you can tell they are CLEARLY on the spectrum based on that short anecdote. No one is forcing the in laws to be there if they don't want to be. If you agree to the visit, you agree to some actual interaction. Otherwise just stay home (which is fine btw!)

I don't know what it is but something is wrong. I've written here before about how they sat in silence when meeting their first grandchild. They literally had nothing to say.
One of their fathers died a while back. Husband was a pallbearer so I was alone at the grave with a toddler and a baby. With one arm I held the baby, with the other I held up an umbrella in the pouring rain. Toddler was whimpering and ILs just looked daggers at me because the toddler wasnt silent. Not a stranger, but their own grandchild. A random second cousin ended up helping me with the umbrella and was very sweet.

I remember your posts!!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I will share the pettiest of my petty vents: my mom asked me not to put bourbon in my pumpkin pie bc she doesn't like the taste. So I made the pie without bourbon. She never even tried the now-bland pumpkin pie and had the key lime. Her comment: well, I guess you put some LIME in this.

Boomers...

My mom considers herself a gourmet chef because she started making recipes with lemon juice in the 90s. Lemon chicken. Lemon pasta. Maybe a squeeze of lemon on green beans.

Her salt and pepper shakers are actually dusty. She has spices that I know are from the 80s because they’re store brand and that store hasn’t existed since then. Eating at her house is whatever the opposite of an adventure is.

[Anonymous]

Sorry for the double post. Obviously I have strong feelings about lack of seasoning!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I will share the pettiest of my petty vents: my mom asked me not to put bourbon in my pumpkin pie bc she doesn't like the taste. So I made the pie without bourbon. She never even tried the now-bland pumpkin pie and had the key lime. Her comment: well, I guess you put some LIME in this.

Boomers...

Let’s get your mom together with my mom who equally dislikes bourbon and quizzed me on if the store bought carton of lactaid eggnog had bourbon in it AS I was clearly pouring it for my young children. I laughed it off and said “no they don’t sell it that way, you have to add your own.” Which resulted in a lecture about how sometimes it comes with it already in it. No amount of breath would convince her they really don’t sell it that way at the grocery store, not in VA anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will share the pettiest of my petty vents: my mom asked me not to put bourbon in my pumpkin pie bc she doesn't like the taste. So I made the pie without bourbon. She never even tried the now-bland pumpkin pie and had the key lime. Her comment: well, I guess you put some LIME in this.

Boomers...

Let’s get your mom together with my mom who equally dislikes bourbon and quizzed me on if the store bought carton of lactaid eggnog had bourbon in it AS I was clearly pouring it for my young children. I laughed it off and said “no they don’t sell it that way, you have to add your own.” Which resulted in a lecture about how sometimes it comes with it already in it. No amount of breath would convince her they really don’t sell it that way at the grocery store, not in VA anyway.

I forgot to add…she also still declined having any after lecturing me on why she was asking and that it was a totally reasonable question. When she declined my DH sweetly offered that he could always go get some to add if that would make the difference…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry for the double post. Obviously I have strong feelings about lack of seasoning!

Ha! It's ok, this is a safe space.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will share the pettiest of my petty vents: my mom asked me not to put bourbon in my pumpkin pie bc she doesn't like the taste. So I made the pie without bourbon. She never even tried the now-bland pumpkin pie and had the key lime. Her comment: well, I guess you put some LIME in this.

Boomers...

Let’s get your mom together with my mom who equally dislikes bourbon and quizzed me on if the store bought carton of lactaid eggnog had bourbon in it AS I was clearly pouring it for my young children. I laughed it off and said “no they don’t sell it that way, you have to add your own.” Which resulted in a lecture about how sometimes it comes with it already in it. No amount of breath would convince her they really don’t sell it that way at the grocery store, not in VA anyway.

I forgot to add…she also still declined having any after lecturing me on why she was asking and that it was a totally reasonable question. When she declined my DH sweetly offered that he could always go get some to add if that would make the difference…

How come the people who need a drink the most never take one?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry for the double post. Obviously I have strong feelings about lack of seasoning!

When I was dating the guy I eventually married (we're divorced now); we had a Friendsgiving the weekend before Thanksgiving because we got a free turkey from the grocery store. I made the turkey, which involved adding some garlic to the compound butter and in the cavity. For some reason, boyfriend's dad was in town that weekend so ate with us and was gobsmacked at the idea of garlic being involved in roasting a turkey. I heard about it for the next 20 years. (we're divorced now, so I no longer have to hear about it.)

Honestly, I can't fathom roasting a chicken or turkey without garlic being involved...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I will share the pettiest of my petty vents: my mom asked me not to put bourbon in my pumpkin pie bc she doesn't like the taste. So I made the pie without bourbon. She never even tried the now-bland pumpkin pie and had the key lime. Her comment: well, I guess you put some LIME in this.

Boomers...

Nah, we like bourbon. You should try my egg nog.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will share the pettiest of my petty vents: my mom asked me not to put bourbon in my pumpkin pie bc she doesn't like the taste. So I made the pie without bourbon. She never even tried the now-bland pumpkin pie and had the key lime. Her comment: well, I guess you put some LIME in this.

Boomers...

Let’s get your mom together with my mom who equally dislikes bourbon and quizzed me on if the store bought carton of lactaid eggnog had bourbon in it AS I was clearly pouring it for my young children. I laughed it off and said “no they don’t sell it that way, you have to add your own.” Which resulted in a lecture about how sometimes it comes with it already in it. No amount of breath would convince her they really don’t sell it that way at the grocery store, not in VA anyway.

My mother is the same way! She thinks anything with a hint of alcohol will be the death of us all and looks down on anyone who has the least bit of alcohol. For example, I don't drink at all except at the Holidays, when I'll have a quarter glass of wine. In her eyes, I'm am abandoned drunkard. She won't have anything cooked with wine, or have chocolate with liqueur.

Meanwhile she's been smoking a pack a day since her 20s...

***Make it make sense***

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry for the double post. Obviously I have strong feelings about lack of seasoning!

When I was dating the guy I eventually married (we're divorced now); we had a Friendsgiving the weekend before Thanksgiving because we got a free turkey from the grocery store. I made the turkey, which involved adding some garlic to the compound butter and in the cavity. For some reason, boyfriend's dad was in town that weekend so ate with us and was gobsmacked at the idea of garlic being involved in roasting a turkey. I heard about it for the next 20 years. (we're divorced now, so I no longer have to hear about it.)

Honestly, I can't fathom roasting a chicken or turkey without garlic being involved...

This reminds me of my sister's MIL (silent gen). She didn't like garlic or onions. How does one cook for such a person? Blandsville.