Would you turn down a 200k job to be a SAHM?

[Anonymous]

DH works 50hr weeks, travels, makes c.350k. I am currently SAHM but got a job offer of 200k, with travel and will require 50 hours are well.

Our net worth is about 2million (excluding house). Kids are 4.5 and 3. We will get a nanny.

I am looking forward to having my career back but apprehensive on how it would work for our family, kids and my relationship with DH.

Just wanted to find out from people who have been there done that - what would you do.

[Anonymous]

Yes.

I would turn it down.

It is not as if your family isn't already rich.

[Anonymous]

Do you like being a SAHM??? If so I would turn it down.

[Anonymous]

That would be too many hours for our household to consider - I don't mean your fifty, but the 100+ total. We wouldn't want two travelers (we both work full time).

How will your husband treat you and your job? If his will be considered the more important one by you both, then I wouldn't do it.

[Anonymous]

I would and I have

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't do it. I am SAHM now with less assets and I still would not do it. I think my quality of life would plummet - not seeing my kids and DH would just not be fulfilling, no matter how awesome the career was. The whole "on your dying moment bit" about wanting to spend more time with loved ones, than making money.

[Anonymous]

I would turn it down, unless you are completely bored to tears. If bored just a bit, look for something part time to keep up your skills.

[Anonymous]

What energizes you?

How does SAH influence your relationship with your DH?

[Anonymous]

I would hold out for PT 100k

[Anonymous]

OP here - i was holding out for PT 100k but simply cant find anything. It looks like it mega FT or SAHM.

is it worth taking it and seeing if i can segue into something part time in a year or so?

[Anonymous]

That's hard. But like PP have mentioned a lot of it depends on how you feel about SAH / your work.

[Anonymous]

The money is not the key thing here. The key is how you fee about SAH/working. Abstract from the money.

[Anonymous]

I like my work and am lukewarm about SAHM but as the kids are getting older i am enjoying things more. On the other hand, ive always thought of myself as a career woman. Nervous about not having earning potential myself

But am very conflicted about kids not having enough time with parents which is likely to be the case with us.

I am genuinely on the fence on this. Hence seeking opinions.

[Anonymous]

21:55 back again. Didn't see your follow up.

If it were me I would take it and try to segue into PT down the road. I work PT (though for significantly less than your 100K) and was able to negotiate that because I had a previously established relationship / value to my office. I think it is very, very difficult to find quality PT work off the bat, but that there are many more opportunities to create a good PT set up for both sides once you are in the position.

Though depending on hours you may also need to look for something less than $100K - I think PT generally comes with the equivalent of an hourly pay cut as well, so that 50% effort doesn't get you 50% of the salary. But at least for me the flexibility / life balance is definitely worth it.

[Anonymous]

I would, because then I'd make more than my combined DH+my salary (I WOHM almost FT), and he could (and probably would) stay home.

Ha. Score one for DCUM making me feel poor again. Why do I click on these threads?

But seriously, that sounds like a recipe for an unhappy and chaotic household in my opinion. I realize going back to a career part-time is hard if you haven't been working, but I'd look for something that was maybe slightly less demanding for your first job back after SAH.