Friend's husband made comment about me...WWYD?
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Anonymous
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So I have been friends with DH's best friend's (Craig) wife (Amy) for a few years now. Saturday Amy and I had a girls' night with some of our other friends and while one of our single friends was regaling us with tales of her online dating experience, Amy, who was pretty drunk, blurted out that Craig had told her he wanted to sleep with me. After a couple seconds of silence, another friend said something along the lines of "Oh Amy, I'm sure you just misheard him" to which she replied "no, he's said it a few times now." We all kind of flubbed through it (oh amy he wouldn't say that, he loves you, he wouldn't want to cheat on you, no amy I would never do anything with him) someone changed the subject and the rest of the night went on. I didn't get a chance to talk to her on Sunday, so yesterday I reached out in a half joking manner and said "how did you feel yesterday? Were you hurting at all from all those martinis". She replied "Yeah, I had a headache for most of the day." We kind of did a back and forth about how we can't drink like we did in college etc and after a few moments of silence , she texted me back and said "ya know, I meant what I said on Saturday. He's mentioned it a handful of times." Again I kind of flubbed back that I would never help him cheat, no interest in him, wouldn't cheat on DH and I'm sure said a bunch of wrong things. She changed the subject which I took as my cue to shut up about it.
Anyways, Dh and Craig are part of an organization that meets once a month. Because the meeting is 10 min from our house and 45 min from Craig's, he often gets together with DH and other friends for a guys' night the night before and then they take a cab home and he stays in our guest room. He's supposed to spend the night here on Friday. I'm really not comfortable with it, at all. It isn't like I think he is going to try something, so perhaps I am overreacting. If I am, please tell me. If I tell DH why I don't want Craig to spend the night, he'll want to know why. And for obvious reasons, I don't want to tell him his best friend has made comments about wanting to sleep with me. So WWYD? Am I overreacting and should I just let him stay here? Ugh I have no idea how to go forward. I feel like every time we get together it is just going to be awkward. |
Anonymous
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zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz boring too long of a post
next? |
Anonymous
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how about be flattered that someone finds you attractive?
we don't die after we get married. maybe they have an open marriage, or want to have a threesome/foursome? you made your point to her, you won't sleep with him. now just move on and don't wreck more than one friendship over it. |
Anonymous
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Kind of depends on when he says it. Were they having a discussion about 'who do you think is attractive" and Amy asked him do you think OP is attractive and Craig saidd yeah sure and Amy said, if you were both single would you go for her and Craig said yeah. Where they talking their 'real life top 5 hall pass list'. Is it a running inside joke of some kind?
Or does Craig just tell Amy at the dinner table - you know I've love to sleep with friend's wife - OP. |
Anonymous
| You read why too much into it. Unless her husband was saying it to hurt his wife (didn't sound like the case) it is just the kind of talk some couples have. |
Anonymous
why=way |
Anonymous
| Another DCUMer who needs to take a writing course. Sigh. Oh, and lay off of the booze. |
Anonymous
Good question. I know it wasn't along the lines of the 1st but can't imagine it would be along the lines of the 2nd either. I know he has at times been hypercritical of her body (trying to convince her to get a boob job and a tummy tuck) so I could see him throwing it out there in a time like that. As to the other PP, I would be fine if he said I was attractive. But to tell his wife he wants to have sex with me just seems weird. I'd be pretty mad if DH said that about one of my friends and I'd be pretty annoyed if DH then spent the night at her house, even if her husband was around. No idea about the open marriage/threesome. I suppose anything is possible. |
Anonymous
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She's hinting she maybe wants a threesome or wife swap maybe? If you aren't into that then never mention this to DH. Do not discuss it anymore with Amy.
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Anonymous
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She's just putting it on you because she is insecure about it. Just shrug it off, ignore and don't give him the time of day when he comes over. No need to make a big deal... she wants to bother you with it, don't let her and don't entertain her husband.
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Anonymous
His wife made the statement publicly, so a bunch of people know. Doesn't seem like the sort of thing you should be responsible for keeping from your own husband, especially because the statement made you uncomfortable! |
Anonymous
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To tell his wife he wants to have sex with you is one thing
For his wife to tell you he wants to have sex with you is another thing. Sounds like they were feeling you out for a threesome/swinging. |
Anonymous
| I think he's saying he wants a threesome. You've done all you need to do. Pretend you don't know and go on with life as normal with them as friends. |
Anonymous
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16:33 here.
Don't tell your husband! Jesus. Do not tell him, don't start drama please. Just ignore ignore ignore. Don't propagate this any further. The wife already changed the subject via text so step away from this situation. |
Anonymous
| Ignore drunk and stupid. You know you are never going to sleep with Craig. Tell your DH if you feel uncomfortable but it really isn't a big deal. |