Bullying on Bus - It's staaarting....
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Anonymous
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My 7th grader is being bullied by a boy who's family we are WELL familiar with, as my daughter used to be friends with his older sister. The older sister, now in high school, started drinking at the end of middle school, which is when my daughter walked away from her and the rest of that crowd. The family is quite troubled (drunk father, uninvolved mother) so I'm not surprised the boy is a bully. Regardless, HE is not my issue - my son is.
Kid and his friend took my son's phone (they are allowed to use it on the bus as an iPod, etc) and hid it, and relentlessly harass my son. My son sits away from them but they deliberately position themselves on the bus to harass him. The bus driver is useless, in a "not my job" sort of way. My son and this kid went to elementary school together, and it was tail end of last year this kid started behaving like a bully. My son showed me a thread on instagram where he said all sorts of nasty things to my son, as well as to other kids, and I printed it out. The kid even went as far as to bring me into the conversation in a "no one will ever like you but your mother" type way. Nice. My son has his own friends and usually steers clear of this kid due to his reputation, which has worked - till now. I've contacted the Middle School today and told them that I want this looked into, that this kid was a problem in elementary school, that his behavior is continuing, and I will NOT tolerate it. I made it QUITE clear they are not to drop the ball on this and they promised to look into it. I will bring in the printout from Instagram to reinforce my point, that this kid is nasty towards others. If I need to, I will bring up my friend's daughter, who has now graduated high school, and the physical and emotional bullying she endured on their buses, to which they did nothing, even when she was physically assaulted. At that point, my friend drove her daughter daily to get her off the bus, then sent her to a private high school. My son has defended himself in that he's tried to move away from this kid, has told him to knock it off, etc. everything short of smacking him a good one. I've always told my son he is not to throw the first punch; he's never gotten into a physical altercation. He's always handled his own conflicts in the past, minor that they were. This is his first real experience with a class A bully. He's tried handling it on his own now to no avail and asked me to step in. Any advice for what I should say to the school? I have some pretty clear ideas but would like some feedback. To those that choose to flame? You will be ignored. |
Anonymous
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If you are in MCPS, y ucan fill out a bully form which, I think, holds more weight tha a phone call. I would also insist that the bully get taken of the bus. Was the school responsive when you caleld today?
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Anonymous
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Virginia. They were responsive but snarky, which is their usual approach to all things parent. I did state that I expect the bully not to ride the bus and that I will be driving my child until this is resolved, keeping track of mileage to and fro. The bus ride is 45 minutes - plenty of time for kids to get bored and bother others.
I'll see if they have a bully form. Thank you for telling me about that, and I appreciate your response! |
Anonymous
| Have your son video tape the incident or even use a phone (voice recorder) as evidence of the bullying. Present it to everyone. Principal, who ever is higher than the principal, etc. Have this child removed from the bus. Make sure your child remains calm and does not lash out at them. Please do not mention others in your case( friends daughter). Stay focused on your child. |
Anonymous
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School was responsive, but how and what happened after school intervened? Hard to offer suggestions without this information.
Regardless of policy re: allowable use of electronics on the bus, I'd tell my kid to put away the phone and iPod whenever this kid is on the bus. Just e cause you can use electronics doesn't make it wise to do so. |
Anonymous
| When you talk with administration, I would recommend only bringing up the issues that your son is experiencing. There is nothing they can do about the older sister and your friend's child, that is the past. You want the focus on your son, and what is happening to him now, in the present. For confidentiality reasons, they are not going to discuss those other issues with you, and it might give them the impression you are a busy body. I'm not being critical, there are just a few things I have learned over the years. |
Anonymous
It's a 45 minute ride. If he wants to listen to some music, so be it. Electronics doesn't play into this. You might not like them, but it doesn't. |
Anonymous
Just called today. We'll see re: what they do. |
Anonymous
I agree - I'm sticking with my son's issue. If they don't handle it, or brush it off, then I'll go there. |
Anonymous
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Good luck, OP.
My son was bullied in an MCPS ES and the school was very responsive. There was a form I had to fill out. Hopefully you can nip this in the bud right away! |
Anonymous
But it does make him vulnerable to having his electronics grabbed and stolen. |
Anonymous
I wouldn't bring up the other girl at all. It's over with... Let it go. It doesn't even involve you. |
Anonymous
OP says that they take his iphone and iPod and taunt him with them. So, yes they do figure in. |
Anonymous
| If it wasn't the electronics it would be something else. OP is right to insist this boy be off the bus. |
Anonymous
| 45 minutes on a bus? Is this TJ or something? |