Any other moms out just not order when you eat with your family?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What?! No this is bizarre. If we go out to eat we all get an entree. If you can’t afford it just cook at home.

Not that I need to defend this but when I did it recently we were flying out of DCA and we needed to eat before our flight. We went to Ben Chili’s bowl which didn’t have a kid’s menu and when my daughter got chicken fingers I just didn’t get anything because I didn’t want to fly with leftovers or waste a crap ton of food. One chicken finger order was enough for both of us. She weighs about 45 lbs.

The ultimate White DCUM Almond Mom: go to a well-known DC landmark restaurant because you can snap a pic of the famous sign outside for Instagram, then go in and order not the world-famous chili or half-smokes, but nothing for you and then Mommy’s Going to Share Your Food. But hey, you put that pic up on Instagram and got your “street cred” for visiting Black-owned DC institution.

I don’t know what an almond mom is, my husband was the one who wanted to eat there, I don’t consider the airport location a well-known DC landmark, and I don’t post on social media anymore, but nice try.

And anyway, I just said the restaurant because this is a DC board so I thought you would all know the exact place in the airport!!!

We went on vacation over winter break and the same 45 lbs daughter happens to like steak. If they had a steak on the kids menu, she got it for herself. If not, one night I got the steak and shared with her but my dad and my husband also each did that with her one night too! So at least we are equal opportunity in meal sharers in my family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Wow I can’t believe OP is still come back and defending this weirdness. It’s a free country! No one can make you order a meal (well actually I guess the restaurant manager could give you the choice of doing that or leaving but they won’t realistically). But it’s a really ridiculous choice. You already said your family finds you weird and cheap. I still remember an older cousin doing this while out to eat with our family doing and eating her toddler’s scraps when I was like 8 so a good 30 years ago. My mom was SO humiliated and tried not to show but leaving a huge tip to try to compensate. It’s weird and awkward for everyone else but it sounds like you prefer that to wasting any food at all (or eating it later, which I really can’t understand either). I posted earlier that I really think you should stop going to restaurants and I still feel that way. It sounds like you’re miserable and making everyone else uncomfortable.

where was it said that op's family feels uncomfortable?

Um, literally her post just a few back where she says she TELLS (not asks) them that she is going to eat their food, and they say no, then she does it anyway. And they have no choice but leave some for her because Mommy Has No Food.

no idea why you are so triggered by this, but again there are many posters on this thread who say they do a version of this. calm down. no one is taking YOUR food.

Asked and answered. Don't want to hear the answer? Don't ask the question "where was it said that op's family feels uncomfortable." OP herself has said that her kids push back and say they want their own food and they are hungry. Then she orders nothing, so now they know they have to share with her: Mommy has no food.

I read it more like this:
Kid: I'm ordering the hangar steak
Mom: you are not going to finish that
Kid: Yes I am I suuuuuper hungry
Mom: ok fine order it (he's not going to finish it so I won't order)
Kid: I'm full

Even in the most generous interpretation of this scenario, that kid genuinely orders something silly and doesn't eat it, there are bad things at play here. Mom is displaying lack of confidence in the kid, or allowing the kid to continue a trend of over ordering expensive food and not eating it. Mom isn't included in the entree decision process when deciding what SHE will eat. The entire meal becomes about the kid making a decision that mom thinks is bad but catered to anyway. And meanwhile dad is off eating whatever he ordered in peace. This is an unhealthy dynamic that has nothing to do with the actual amount of food being consumed.

op - no.
when you go out to eat, and a kid's meal isn't offered, the kid has no choice but to order an adult sized meal or split it.
my 2 kids like completely opposing foods so while sometimes they will split with each other, typically that doesn't work.
they don't object to sharing with me on principal, they just have that kid thing where they think they're going to eat it ALL even though it's an adult sized portion. so i say 'why dont you share with your brother?' and they say 'no he wants a burger and I want chicken' and i say 'ok then share with me' and they say ' but i will eat the whole chicken' and i say 'I don't think that is true.'
i dont sit there staring while they eat, but i do essentially force them to share with me.
i'm sorry if this horrifies people but honestly i think it's weird when people order way too much food that their kids were never going to be able to finish. kids are kids for a reason - they think they know a lot of stuff they actually dont know.

So when the chicken arrives at the table, do you get an extra plate and portion some out for yourself or your kid, or do you sit there and wait for your kid to stop eating?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow I can’t believe OP is still come back and defending this weirdness. It’s a free country! No one can make you order a meal (well actually I guess the restaurant manager could give you the choice of doing that or leaving but they won’t realistically). But it’s a really ridiculous choice. You already said your family finds you weird and cheap. I still remember an older cousin doing this while out to eat with our family doing and eating her toddler’s scraps when I was like 8 so a good 30 years ago. My mom was SO humiliated and tried not to show but leaving a huge tip to try to compensate. It’s weird and awkward for everyone else but it sounds like you prefer that to wasting any food at all (or eating it later, which I really can’t understand either). I posted earlier that I really think you should stop going to restaurants and I still feel that way. It sounds like you’re miserable and making everyone else uncomfortable.

where was it said that op's family feels uncomfortable?

Um, literally her post just a few back where she says she TELLS (not asks) them that she is going to eat their food, and they say no, then she does it anyway. And they have no choice but leave some for her because Mommy Has No Food.

no idea why you are so triggered by this, but again there are many posters on this thread who say they do a version of this. calm down. no one is taking YOUR food.

Asked and answered. Don't want to hear the answer? Don't ask the question "where was it said that op's family feels uncomfortable." OP herself has said that her kids push back and say they want their own food and they are hungry. Then she orders nothing, so now they know they have to share with her: Mommy has no food.

I read it more like this:
Kid: I'm ordering the hangar steak
Mom: you are not going to finish that
Kid: Yes I am I suuuuuper hungry
Mom: ok fine order it (he's not going to finish it so I won't order)
Kid: I'm full

Even in the most generous interpretation of this scenario, that kid genuinely orders something silly and doesn't eat it, there are bad things at play here. Mom is displaying lack of confidence in the kid, or allowing the kid to continue a trend of over ordering expensive food and not eating it. Mom isn't included in the entree decision process when deciding what SHE will eat. The entire meal becomes about the kid making a decision that mom thinks is bad but catered to anyway. And meanwhile dad is off eating whatever he ordered in peace. This is an unhealthy dynamic that has nothing to do with the actual amount of food being consumed.

op - no.
when you go out to eat, and a kid's meal isn't offered, the kid has no choice but to order an adult sized meal or split it.
my 2 kids like completely opposing foods so while sometimes they will split with each other, typically that doesn't work.
they don't object to sharing with me on principal, they just have that kid thing where they think they're going to eat it ALL even though it's an adult sized portion. so i say 'why dont you share with your brother?' and they say 'no he wants a burger and I want chicken' and i say 'ok then share with me' and they say ' but i will eat the whole chicken' and i say 'I don't think that is true.'
i dont sit there staring while they eat, but i do essentially force them to share with me.
i'm sorry if this horrifies people but honestly i think it's weird when people order way too much food that their kids were never going to be able to finish. kids are kids for a reason - they think they know a lot of stuff they actually dont know.

OK? So do whatever you want and STFU. Here you are 22 pages later. You do you, but when you actively go out of your way to post here and ask if others do it, and we say we don’t and we think it’s weird or here’s why we don’t do that, you get the feedback you get. If what you are doing works for you, just do it.

well a. some people do do it and b. the other option is not to psychotically troll someone doing a relatively anodyne thing.
i didn't ask expecting rabid responses as if i just said 'hey i lock my kids in their room for hours when they're naughty'.
but yeah - peace out. enjoy your really really strong opinions and categorical rightness on all issues big and small. seems like a fun stance.

[Anonymous]

Years ago I watched some show about the Manson family and it showed that the women weren't allowed to eat until after the dogs ate...and I'm feeling like some of the posters here would fit in there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow I can’t believe OP is still come back and defending this weirdness. It’s a free country! No one can make you order a meal (well actually I guess the restaurant manager could give you the choice of doing that or leaving but they won’t realistically). But it’s a really ridiculous choice. You already said your family finds you weird and cheap. I still remember an older cousin doing this while out to eat with our family doing and eating her toddler’s scraps when I was like 8 so a good 30 years ago. My mom was SO humiliated and tried not to show but leaving a huge tip to try to compensate. It’s weird and awkward for everyone else but it sounds like you prefer that to wasting any food at all (or eating it later, which I really can’t understand either). I posted earlier that I really think you should stop going to restaurants and I still feel that way. It sounds like you’re miserable and making everyone else uncomfortable.

where was it said that op's family feels uncomfortable?

Um, literally her post just a few back where she says she TELLS (not asks) them that she is going to eat their food, and they say no, then she does it anyway. And they have no choice but leave some for her because Mommy Has No Food.

no idea why you are so triggered by this, but again there are many posters on this thread who say they do a version of this. calm down. no one is taking YOUR food.

Asked and answered. Don't want to hear the answer? Don't ask the question "where was it said that op's family feels uncomfortable." OP herself has said that her kids push back and say they want their own food and they are hungry. Then she orders nothing, so now they know they have to share with her: Mommy has no food.

I read it more like this:
Kid: I'm ordering the hangar steak
Mom: you are not going to finish that
Kid: Yes I am I suuuuuper hungry
Mom: ok fine order it (he's not going to finish it so I won't order)
Kid: I'm full

Even in the most generous interpretation of this scenario, that kid genuinely orders something silly and doesn't eat it, there are bad things at play here. Mom is displaying lack of confidence in the kid, or allowing the kid to continue a trend of over ordering expensive food and not eating it. Mom isn't included in the entree decision process when deciding what SHE will eat. The entire meal becomes about the kid making a decision that mom thinks is bad but catered to anyway. And meanwhile dad is off eating whatever he ordered in peace. This is an unhealthy dynamic that has nothing to do with the actual amount of food being consumed.

op - no.
when you go out to eat, and a kid's meal isn't offered, the kid has no choice but to order an adult sized meal or split it.
my 2 kids like completely opposing foods so while sometimes they will split with each other, typically that doesn't work.
they don't object to sharing with me on principal, they just have that kid thing where they think they're going to eat it ALL even though it's an adult sized portion. so i say 'why dont you share with your brother?' and they say 'no he wants a burger and I want chicken' and i say 'ok then share with me' and they say ' but i will eat the whole chicken' and i say 'I don't think that is true.'
i dont sit there staring while they eat, but i do essentially force them to share with me.
i'm sorry if this horrifies people but honestly i think it's weird when people order way too much food that their kids were never going to be able to finish. kids are kids for a reason - they think they know a lot of stuff they actually dont know.

OK? So do whatever you want and STFU. Here you are 22 pages later. You do you, but when you actively go out of your way to post here and ask if others do it, and we say we don’t and we think it’s weird or here’s why we don’t do that, you get the feedback you get. If what you are doing works for you, just do it.

well a. some people do do it and b. the other option is not to psychotically troll someone doing a relatively anodyne thing.
i didn't ask expecting rabid responses as if i just said 'hey i lock my kids in their room for hours when they're naughty'.
but yeah - peace out. enjoy your really really strong opinions and categorical rightness on all issues big and small. seems like a fun stance.

Show how secure you are by posting again, some more. Your kids love the way you guys dine out. They for sure think it's fun and not at all awkward and uncomfortable. They are definitely learning the place of a woman and a mom at the table from your example.

[Anonymous]

I did this sometimes when the kids were smaller and in restaurants with large portions. Not everything makes good leftovers. With restaurants as expensive as they are nowadays, I don’t want anything going to waste. It has nothing to do with eating disorders. Now that my kids are teens this never happens anyway. We are rarely at restaurants, and if we are, they eat everything they order.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This sounds like an eating disorder.

Nah, it sounds like this forum is full of an echo chamber of shameless misers. Last weekend there was a thread full of adults boasting about being cheapskates ordering from the subsidized, much cheaper kid's menu. I wouldn't be surprised to see a thread about how clever it is to ask for ice water, sugar packets, and a few lemons to make a "free" pitcher of lemonade at your table. Welcome to modern America: Brimming with low-trust ruthless cheapskates always eager to get over on people and small businesses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What?! No this is bizarre. If we go out to eat we all get an entree. If you can’t afford it just cook at home.

Not that I need to defend this but when I did it recently we were flying out of DCA and we needed to eat before our flight. We went to Ben Chili’s bowl which didn’t have a kid’s menu and when my daughter got chicken fingers I just didn’t get anything because I didn’t want to fly with leftovers or waste a crap ton of food. One chicken finger order was enough for both of us. She weighs about 45 lbs.

The ultimate White DCUM Almond Mom: go to a well-known DC landmark restaurant because you can snap a pic of the famous sign outside for Instagram, then go in and order not the world-famous chili or half-smokes, but nothing for you and then Mommy’s Going to Share Your Food. But hey, you put that pic up on Instagram and got your “street cred” for visiting Black-owned DC institution.

Imagine what these "perfect" families are doing on vacations. Anything to "save" a buck. Reputation and dignity mean nothing to some people. Totally classless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This sounds like an eating disorder.

Nah, it sounds like this forum is full of an echo chamber of shameless misers. Last weekend there was a thread full of adults boasting about being cheapskates ordering from the subsidized, much cheaper kid's menu. I wouldn't be surprised to see a thread about how clever it is to ask for ice water, sugar packets, and a few lemons to make a "free" pitcher of lemonade at your table. Welcome to modern America: Brimming with low-trust ruthless cheapskates always eager to get over on people and small businesses.

How so? Most people are telling OP they don't do this and they aren't going to settle for chicken nuggets when ther are much better options on the menu. Why not just order what OP really wants and then get an extra plate and have the kids eat from that plate? Why the other way around? Does OP cater extensively to her kids palates when she cooks at home?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This sounds like an eating disorder.

Nah, it sounds like this forum is full of an echo chamber of shameless misers. Last weekend there was a thread full of adults boasting about being cheapskates ordering from the subsidized, much cheaper kid's menu. I wouldn't be surprised to see a thread about how clever it is to ask for ice water, sugar packets, and a few lemons to make a "free" pitcher of lemonade at your table. Welcome to modern America: Brimming with low-trust ruthless cheapskates always eager to get over on people and small businesses.

How so? Most people are telling OP they don't do this and they aren't going to settle for chicken nuggets when ther are much better options on the menu. Why not just order what OP really wants and then get an extra plate and have the kids eat from that plate? Why the other way around? Does OP cater extensively to her kids palates when she cooks at home?

+1 million

OP is the mom. She has the authority to determine what is ordered. She says she knows, roughly, what the kids could eat. She could order for herself, separate out her adult portion, and give the kids the rest, promising them a snack or dessert if they are truly still hungry. But instead she would rather play these little psychological games with the kids and eat slobbered over chicken nugget halves and grilled cheese crusts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What?! No this is bizarre. If we go out to eat we all get an entree. If you can’t afford it just cook at home.

Not that I need to defend this but when I did it recently we were flying out of DCA and we needed to eat before our flight. We went to Ben Chili’s bowl which didn’t have a kid’s menu and when my daughter got chicken fingers I just didn’t get anything because I didn’t want to fly with leftovers or waste a crap ton of food. One chicken finger order was enough for both of us. She weighs about 45 lbs.

The ultimate White DCUM Almond Mom: go to a well-known DC landmark restaurant because you can snap a pic of the famous sign outside for Instagram, then go in and order not the world-famous chili or half-smokes, but nothing for you and then Mommy’s Going to Share Your Food. But hey, you put that pic up on Instagram and got your “street cred” for visiting Black-owned DC institution.

Why oh why do some of you need to make every single goddamn thread about race?

[Anonymous]

the funny thing is this is the same crew, many of whom think it's ok to spank.

but share food with your kid who is full - nope, you're the worst.

[Anonymous]

This is a supremely disordered thread. I have never sat without food, hoping to scavenge some mac n cheese/nuggets/grilled cheese (which I love, jut not half eaten by my kids).


Yes, I made the separate pod people thread. This reeks of that line of thinking.

If I am not very hungry, I'll get soup or a house salad. But I mostly get WETFIW.

[Anonymous]

OP - totally fine what you are doing. Food is food and if you are ok with it then it's normal! Kids waste so much and we live in a society where that is acceptable. People are reading way too much into your post.

[Anonymous]

It’s weird not to order yourself food. If your kid doesn’t finish, take it home and feed it to them for their next 1-2 meals.

Why is that hard?

If you can’t afford to eat out, don’t.