Families who can afford private but go public, why?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not all privates and publics are the same. Everyone has different priorities.

I understand wanting to send kids to elite privates or special privates for SN children. I don’t understand those who send their kids to mediocre private schools so their kids can get coddled. At the same time, college admissions are unimpressive. No thanks.

Look, my kids go to an "elite private," but if you knew how many parents here are legacies at T20 schools, you would probably have a different view of the value of this school for the purpose of college admissions. If you're going to a private, it has to be for what the private school is giving you in and of itself. It can't be trying to buy your way into a better school because it probably will fail.

So yeah if I spent 500k and sent my kids to an elite or not elite private and they ended up at like Boston University or UVA, I would be pretty damn pissed.

Then private school is DEFINITELY not a fit for you. Most kids at my elite private end up at those kinds of schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Private schools have much lower standards for teachers. And they pay far less than public schools. If you are good at your profession, why get paid a third or more less????

Wow, you’re not a teacher and you don’t know anyone who is.

Teachers at private schools get paid less because their job is much easier. They are dealing with smaller classes, children who were able to pass entrance exams, and children without significant behavioral issues. That’s it. A lot of teachers are willing to trade the less stressful job for less money. The inner-city schools here pay a lot more, because they have to, because it’s a shit show of a job.

I will say that there are a significant number of teachers in private schools whose job is a “hobby” profession — There’s a significant other source of income somewhere. Some of those teachers are absolutely wonderful so I can’t really complain!

I teach math as a hobby. A few years back when I was starting I had thoughts about teaching in a public school. After doing some reading, I realized that what initially sounded awesome to me (i.e teaching at one of the great public school in the area) might be unrewarding primarily because I'd be forced to teach with a set in stone curriculum, and also deal with lots of disruption/behavior issues. While I no longer fantasize about teaching in a public school, I still occasionally entertain the idea of teaching in a private somewhere. If I can find a place with a bunch of smart, well behaved kids who are there because they want to learn more, and I'm able to push them harder than in public school using without being micromanaged, I'd definitely consider it, irrespective of the lower pay.

Compass Homeschool Enrichment in Oakton. Check it out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Private schools have much lower standards for teachers. And they pay far less than public schools. If you are good at your profession, why get paid a third or more less????

Wow, you’re not a teacher and you don’t know anyone who is.

Teachers at private schools get paid less because their job is much easier. They are dealing with smaller classes, children who were able to pass entrance exams, and children without significant behavioral issues. That’s it. A lot of teachers are willing to trade the less stressful job for less money. The inner-city schools here pay a lot more, because they have to, because it’s a shit show of a job.

I will say that there are a significant number of teachers in private schools whose job is a “hobby” profession — There’s a significant other source of income somewhere. Some of those teachers are absolutely wonderful so I can’t really complain!

I teach math as a hobby. A few years back when I was starting I had thoughts about teaching in a public school. After doing some reading, I realized that what initially sounded awesome to me (i.e teaching at one of the great public school in the area) might be unrewarding primarily because I'd be forced to teach with a set in stone curriculum, and also deal with lots of disruption/behavior issues. While I no longer fantasize about teaching in a public school, I still occasionally entertain the idea of teaching in a private somewhere. If I can find a place with a bunch of smart, well behaved kids who are there because they want to learn more, and I'm able to push them harder than in public school using without being micromanaged, I'd definitely consider it, irrespective of the lower pay.

Compass Homeschool Enrichment in Oakton. Check it out.

The website looks nice and they seem to have a wide variety of weekly classes. But doesn't appear to focus or have much related to math. The few descriptions suggest it is more aimed at tutoring and help with schoolwork.

I'm curious if there are any math circles in the area. The type where kids (and sometimes parents) meet and explore a particular deeply during a session.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Private schools have much lower standards for teachers. And they pay far less than public schools. If you are good at your profession, why get paid a third or more less????

Wow, you’re not a teacher and you don’t know anyone who is.

Teachers at private schools get paid less because their job is much easier. They are dealing with smaller classes, children who were able to pass entrance exams, and children without significant behavioral issues. That’s it. A lot of teachers are willing to trade the less stressful job for less money. The inner-city schools here pay a lot more, because they have to, because it’s a shit show of a job.

I will say that there are a significant number of teachers in private schools whose job is a “hobby” profession — There’s a significant other source of income somewhere. Some of those teachers are absolutely wonderful so I can’t really complain!

I teach math as a hobby. A few years back when I was starting I had thoughts about teaching in a public school. After doing some reading, I realized that what initially sounded awesome to me (i.e teaching at one of the great public school in the area) might be unrewarding primarily because I'd be forced to teach with a set in stone curriculum, and also deal with lots of disruption/behavior issues. While I no longer fantasize about teaching in a public school, I still occasionally entertain the idea of teaching in a private somewhere. If I can find a place with a bunch of smart, well behaved kids who are there because they want to learn more, and I'm able to push them harder than in public school using without being micromanaged, I'd definitely consider it, irrespective of the lower pay.

Compass Homeschool Enrichment in Oakton. Check it out.

The website looks nice and they seem to have a wide variety of weekly classes. But doesn't appear to focus or have much related to math. The few descriptions suggest it is more aimed at tutoring and help with schoolwork.

I'm curious if there are any math circles in the area. The type where kids (and sometimes parents) meet and explore a particular topic deeply during a session.

Oops, missed a word.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Private schools have much lower standards for teachers. And they pay far less than public schools. If you are good at your profession, why get paid a third or more less????

Wow, you’re not a teacher and you don’t know anyone who is.

Teachers at private schools get paid less because their job is much easier. They are dealing with smaller classes, children who were able to pass entrance exams, and children without significant behavioral issues. That’s it. A lot of teachers are willing to trade the less stressful job for less money. The inner-city schools here pay a lot more, because they have to, because it’s a shit show of a job.

I will say that there are a significant number of teachers in private schools whose job is a “hobby” profession — There’s a significant other source of income somewhere. Some of those teachers are absolutely wonderful so I can’t really complain!

I teach math as a hobby. A few years back when I was starting I had thoughts about teaching in a public school. After doing some reading, I realized that what initially sounded awesome to me (i.e teaching at one of the great public school in the area) might be unrewarding primarily because I'd be forced to teach with a set in stone curriculum, and also deal with lots of disruption/behavior issues. While I no longer fantasize about teaching in a public school, I still occasionally entertain the idea of teaching in a private somewhere. If I can find a place with a bunch of smart, well behaved kids who are there because they want to learn more, and I'm able to push them harder than in public school using without being micromanaged, I'd definitely consider it, irrespective of the lower pay.

Compass Homeschool Enrichment in Oakton. Check it out.

The website looks nice and they seem to have a wide variety of weekly classes. But doesn't appear to focus or have much related to math. The few descriptions suggest it is more aimed at tutoring and help with schoolwork.

I'm curious if there are any math circles in the area. The type where kids (and sometimes parents) meet and explore a particular deeply during a session.

You design your own curriculum. Admin will hire you or not. Kids sign up for your class, they are not required to take anything.

If parents and kids are happy they will clamor to have you for the next session, and it's likely you will teach more classes (same topics/ curriculum if you want, a different class if you want) if you have the time and there is space.

It's worth an email to the admin, and a phone call.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If your family can afford private school but you opt-in to public school, why?

As you can guess from the question, we can afford private but for a variety of complicated reasons decided to go public. A big one of which was that we went to public school ourselves and turned out fine. I now find myself continually second-guessing myself with a bit of a “grass is greener” perspective. I feel like if I can afford private I should, and that I need to justify the decision to myself to continue to go public.

Would be helpful to hear from other people in a similar situation.

(I hope this question doesn’t come off the wrong way. I know these boards get hella judgy and hopefully you didn’t read the title and get mad thinking someone was judging people who choose to go to public school. I also recognize we are in a good situation to be able to have the choice, and that my consternation about it is a luxury problem.)

Depends on the level of “afford”. I would like to know the families who can absolutely afford private (say HHI of 1 million+ and 2 kids), why you are not sending your kids to private? Some ppl mentioned for example phd from NIH, but they cannot afford private schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your family can afford private school but you opt-in to public school, why?

As you can guess from the question, we can afford private but for a variety of complicated reasons decided to go public. A big one of which was that we went to public school ourselves and turned out fine. I now find myself continually second-guessing myself with a bit of a “grass is greener” perspective. I feel like if I can afford private I should, and that I need to justify the decision to myself to continue to go public.

Would be helpful to hear from other people in a similar situation.

(I hope this question doesn’t come off the wrong way. I know these boards get hella judgy and hopefully you didn’t read the title and get mad thinking someone was judging people who choose to go to public school. I also recognize we are in a good situation to be able to have the choice, and that my consternation about it is a luxury problem.)

Depends on the level of “afford”. I would like to know the families who can absolutely afford private (say HHI of 1 million+ and 2 kids), why you are not sending your kids to private? Some ppl mentioned for example phd from NIH, but they cannot afford private schools.

We have done a mix of both. Different kids, different needs, different times of their lives.

[Anonymous]

Private school teachers make significantly less than public school teachers. If you are a great teacher. Why work for a third less than others???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Private school teachers make significantly less than public school teachers. If you are a great teacher. Why work for a third less than others???

Come on, use your head. There are a lot of reasons why people prioritize less pay over work environment in any profession. Possible reasons I have heard teachers express:

- Because if you are good, you don't want to work in an environment where your coworkers can't get fired even if they commit crimes. It's demoralizing.
- Because you want more flexibility in terms of number of classes you teach.
- Because you like small class sizes.
- Because you don't like teaching to the test.

There are excellent teachers in both, but this point about salary is just silly. People in all sorts of professions choose less pay for work they value; why can't teachers?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Private school teachers make significantly less than public school teachers. If you are a great teacher. Why work for a third less than others???

Also, at my kids school plenty of the teachers have very high HHI because their husbands have “big jobs”. They aren’t in it for the money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It makes people feel bad that they can’t give their children the best. That’s why they lash out.
Whatever. Most kids are fine in public.

This is the attitude that is repugnant and may be why you experiencing "lashing out"--the idea that there is a universal "best" in these options. And this thread is about people who can afford private but don't choose to, so obviously it's not about the case of whether they can give their kids a private school education, but rather whether they think it's the better option. We came to a view that public is "the best" for us--not on the basis of finances-- but wouldn't impose that view on others.

And some people value education above all else. Some think it’s a waste of money.
Everyone is different.

Well, as long as you are not implying that choosing private means you value education above else, whereas someone who chooses public doesn't share that priority. We choose public and I would say I value education very highly. I have a PhD so I've clearly invested time, money and effort in my own education. I spend considerable thought and energy on my children's education. We could easily afford private. Additionally, I have relatives that would happily and easily fully fund a private education for our kids (and have done so for my siblings' kids who prefer private). I have decided--with care and deep value for education and ample resources to choose--that public is a better educational environment for my children.

I’m going to take a wild guess - GS10 school full of kids whose parents also can afford private but chose that high school. I would guess if the choice was between an average public school with a 30-40 percent FRL rate and a private school you’d have chosen the latter. What I’m getting at is that the public vs private distinction, at least as discussed in this thread, is meaningless. The “choice” here is between the best public high schools in the area, and privates. It makes wealthy people feel good and normal to say they support public education but really they only a certain kind of public school, the “good enough” kind.

(Raises hand) we can afford private. We had two kids graduate from TC Williams, regularly bashed as among the worst high schools within shouting distance of the beltway. Both went to excellent colleges and our neighborhood friends, whose kids were at SSSAS or other similar schools, lamented in retrospect that the public school would have been a better choice if college outcomes were the criterion. There were other reasons for their private choice, but that’s the one that looms very large in the rear view mirror.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It makes people feel bad that they can’t give their children the best. That’s why they lash out.
Whatever. Most kids are fine in public.

This is the attitude that is repugnant and may be why you experiencing "lashing out"--the idea that there is a universal "best" in these options. And this thread is about people who can afford private but don't choose to, so obviously it's not about the case of whether they can give their kids a private school education, but rather whether they think it's the better option. We came to a view that public is "the best" for us--not on the basis of finances-- but wouldn't impose that view on others.

And some people value education above all else. Some think it’s a waste of money.
Everyone is different.

Well, as long as you are not implying that choosing private means you value education above else, whereas someone who chooses public doesn't share that priority. We choose public and I would say I value education very highly. I have a PhD so I've clearly invested time, money and effort in my own education. I spend considerable thought and energy on my children's education. We could easily afford private. Additionally, I have relatives that would happily and easily fully fund a private education for our kids (and have done so for my siblings' kids who prefer private). I have decided--with care and deep value for education and ample resources to choose--that public is a better educational environment for my children.

I’m going to take a wild guess - GS10 school full of kids whose parents also can afford private but chose that high school. I would guess if the choice was between an average public school with a 30-40 percent FRL rate and a private school you’d have chosen the latter. What I’m getting at is that the public vs private distinction, at least as discussed in this thread, is meaningless. The “choice” here is between the best public high schools in the area, and privates. It makes wealthy people feel good and normal to say they support public education but really they only a certain kind of public school, the “good enough” kind.

(Raises hand) we can afford private. We had two kids graduate from TC Williams, regularly bashed as among the worst high schools within shouting distance of the beltway. Both went to excellent colleges and our neighborhood friends, whose kids were at SSSAS or other similar schools, lamented in retrospect that the public school would have been a better choice if college outcomes were the criterion. There were other reasons for their private choice, but that’s the one that looms very large in the rear view mirror.

We used to live in Alexandria and almost sent our kids to SASS until we saw their college admissions on a post card. We eventually moved to McLean and our kids to attend GS10 school with many families who can afford private.

[Anonymous]

I live in Vienna. I could afford a private school, but why would I want to? The privates are no better than the publics, and since I am not christian, religion is not an issue.

In our public schools, with one or two exceptions (one math teacher, one English teacher), every teacher has been supportive, high quality, pushing the kids, and caring. Even the supposed A-hole band director (he is not; communicating with 160 kids at once requires some yelling).

[Anonymous]

I went to an “elite” private school and my DH went to public. We met at an ivy. The chief benefits of going public:
1) having friends in the neighborhood you live in or at least closer. For me, there was no popping over to a friends house after school.
2) math and science are frequently better

So I think it depends on what your DC is like. I will say if we decide to send our toddler to public school it will be knowing we will have to hire a private college admissions counselor.

[Anonymous]

There is a growing consensus in our neighborhood that as the population of the publics continue to go up and the County does more 'experimenting' with curriculum and pathways, the overall education is getting worse by the year. It is not the same school system neighbors with even fairly recent college graduates had.

There has been an ever growing increase in the number of private school families in our NoVa neighborhood. Some switched in elementary, some in MS, but a great deal more switch for 9th. The large grade sizes also mean a lot less opportunity to participate on sports teams, etc. There are the same number of spots for a HS with 3,000 students as other public HS with 1,500, etc.

We had a great public elementary school. Middle school has been 'okay'. My kids don't seem to have to do much of anything for As. There is very little focus on writing/grammar and the math acceleration pathways are a known problem for not teaching 'depth' in the subject. Sure, kids can go and score a 600 on a MULTIPLE choice Algebra SOL--but the foundation is not solid.