Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Need blind is not need blind. I cannot tell you how many subpar students are accepted to prestigious schools (think NYU level) because they are full pay and they ED'd, while their financial aid seeking counterparts with stellar stats get rejected.

Some T50 schools are notorious for this. There's a good list circulating here from last year?
NYU is high on it; so is Georgetown.

[Anonymous]

One thing I never heard anyone talk about…
There is a flurry of activity when a ton of early action decisions are released in mid December…it’s so exciting even if some of the news is not what your kid had hoped. But those early decisions come in fast.

January, February and March are excruciatingly long. I swear each month feels like 3 months. So many kids are committed to their ED school and waiting for deferred results and RD schools is just plain hard. My kid is so anxious to just get all the decisions back, commit, find a roommate etc but still a ways to go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One thing I never heard anyone talk about…
There is a flurry of activity when a ton of early action decisions are released in mid December…it’s so exciting even if some of the news is not what your kid had hoped. But those early decisions come in fast.

January, February and March are excruciatingly long. I swear each month feels like 3 months. So many kids are committed to their ED school and waiting for deferred results and RD schools is just plain hard. My kid is so anxious to just get all the decisions back, commit, find a roommate etc but still a ways to go.

Tell me about it! I keep thinking, I can't wait for this to be over. Then I realize that when it's over, DC will be half out the door. Exciting for DC, sad for the mom....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One thing I never heard anyone talk about…
There is a flurry of activity when a ton of early action decisions are released in mid December…it’s so exciting even if some of the news is not what your kid had hoped. But those early decisions come in fast.

January, February and March are excruciatingly long. I swear each month feels like 3 months. So many kids are committed to their ED school and waiting for deferred results and RD schools is just plain hard. My kid is so anxious to just get all the decisions back, commit, find a roommate etc but still a ways to go.

Agreed. I just want this done, It seems interminable. I have b/b twins. One is set, one is waiting for 10 RD results. We are just over it and ready to move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Boys have an easier admission to LACs, but they DO NOT have an easier admission to business schools and engineering. Example, the upper middle class, northern Virginia white boy with college educated parents who tries to apply to Virginia Tech for business. Better have impeccable stats. Meanwhile, a girl in his class with much lower stats got accepted for a Classics major.

Kid is fine and doing well at an oos school w a great business program, but don’t tell me that all boys have it easier.

Business/ CS / Engineering are male-dominated majors.

Makes sense.

Anybody know if the gender divide applies to other majors? Like I would imagine if a female just HAS to go to a certain college, applying as a philosophy major would be a good strategy. And guys in same situation might want to apply as French majors.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't encourage the concept of a dream school or perfect fit or regale your student with stories of how amazing your college experience was.

My daughter and her friends got some impressive acceptances, but not necessarily the ones they wanted--this includes kids who were accepted through ED--the grass is always greener and hindsight is 20/20 after acceptances come out. There is going to be a feeling of "settling" versus going to a dream school for many students.

And many continue to have a less than great fall semester. Do not build up college too big as the transition is rough for many.

College Freshman parent here. 100 percent agree with this. Freshman year is going OK for DC -- but it hasn't been without it stresses. This is true for many of DC's friends at the same college and at other colleges. Better to go in with a realistic expectation of transition challenges. We were a bit in la-la land.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't encourage the concept of a dream school or perfect fit or regale your student with stories of how amazing your college experience was.

My daughter and her friends got some impressive acceptances, but not necessarily the ones they wanted--this includes kids who were accepted through ED--the grass is always greener and hindsight is 20/20 after acceptances come out. There is going to be a feeling of "settling" versus going to a dream school for many students.

And many continue to have a less than great fall semester. Do not build up college too big as the transition is rough for many.

College Freshman parent here. 100 percent agree with this. Freshman year is going OK for DC -- but it hasn't been without it stresses. This is true for many of DC's friends at the same college and at other colleges. Better to go in with a realistic expectation of transition challenges. We were a bit in la-la land.

Agree with this. It’s very child and experience dependent.

I know kids miserable at Williams but others loving Davidson. Miserable at Harvard but others loving Yale. There is no one perfect school.

You may be thrilled with RD options in March and your kid’s first year may be miserable at a T20.

[Anonymous]

My child likes her school but there have been unexpected challenges. Her roommate was in an abusive relationship with a kid that was known to have hit other girls at the school. Ultimately the girl moved out after the suite mates complained about how much he was around, but it was a tense semester and my child lost one of her best friends in the process.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Boys have an easier admission to LACs, but they DO NOT have an easier admission to business schools and engineering. Example, the upper middle class, northern Virginia white boy with college educated parents who tries to apply to Virginia Tech for business. Better have impeccable stats. Meanwhile, a girl in his class with much lower stats got accepted for a Classics major.

Kid is fine and doing well at an oos school w a great business program, but don’t tell me that all boys have it easier.

Business/ CS / Engineering are male-dominated majors.

Makes sense.

Anybody know if the gender divide applies to other majors? Like I would imagine if a female just HAS to go to a certain college, applying as a philosophy major would be a good strategy. And guys in same situation might want to apply as French majors.

Yes and no. Philosophy and history are not necessarily undersubscribed — and almost never as undersubscribed as any other humanities major. In that sense, being a female philosophy major (although philosophy is a “guy” major) probably gives less of an edge than being a female French major (which is almost exclusively female); with often 2-3 French majors a year, at best, many of these departments are in serious trouble.

To be sure, a genuine male French major would be a unicorn. But I would assume AOs are suspicious of the male actually majoring in French once admitted. To say the least, the male would likely have to do more than take AP French and be co-President of the French club to make that narrative convincing (and other issues to: did the kid take lots of science, computer science, econ and other electives vs, say, a second foreign language, AP music, art etc.?).

A female may not have quite as high a bar of suspicion to overcome. Not only because all modern languages are female-dominated (classics is more balanced), but French is traditionally the most female-dominated— that whole wistful Paris thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lesson learned: the UMD App has as many essay questions as an Ivy League institution.

The extra UMD questions are really annoying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't encourage the concept of a dream school or perfect fit or regale your student with stories of how amazing your college experience was.

My daughter and her friends got some impressive acceptances, but not necessarily the ones they wanted--this includes kids who were accepted through ED--the grass is always greener and hindsight is 20/20 after acceptances come out. There is going to be a feeling of "settling" versus going to a dream school for many students.

And many continue to have a less than great fall semester. Do not build up college too big as the transition is rough for many.

College Freshman parent here. 100 percent agree with this. Freshman year is going OK for DC -- but it hasn't been without it stresses. This is true for many of DC's friends at the same college and at other colleges. Better to go in with a realistic expectation of transition challenges. We were a bit in la-la land.

+1

Another parent of a freshman who is doing well now but first semester was rough. I don't think enough attention is given to the transition to college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Boys have an easier admission to LACs, but they DO NOT have an easier admission to business schools and engineering. Example, the upper middle class, northern Virginia white boy with college educated parents who tries to apply to Virginia Tech for business. Better have impeccable stats. Meanwhile, a girl in his class with much lower stats got accepted for a Classics major.

Kid is fine and doing well at an oos school w a great business program, but don’t tell me that all boys have it easier.

Business/ CS / Engineering are male-dominated majors.

Makes sense.

Anybody know if the gender divide applies to other majors? Like I would imagine if a female just HAS to go to a certain college, applying as a philosophy major would be a good strategy. And guys in same situation might want to apply as French majors.

Yes and no. Philosophy and history are not necessarily undersubscribed — and almost never as undersubscribed as any other humanities major. In that sense, being a female philosophy major (although philosophy is a “guy” major) probably gives less of an edge than being a female French major (which is almost exclusively female); with often 2-3 French majors a year, at best, many of these departments are in serious trouble.

To be sure, a genuine male French major would be a unicorn. But I would assume AOs are suspicious of the male actually majoring in French once admitted. To say the least, the male would likely have to do more than take AP French and be co-President of the French club to make that narrative convincing (and other issues to: did the kid take lots of science, computer science, econ and other electives vs, say, a second foreign language, AP music, art etc.?).

A female may not have quite as high a bar of suspicion to overcome. Not only because all modern languages are female-dominated (classics is more balanced), but French is traditionally the most female-dominated— that whole wistful Paris thing.

Philosophy is a male major? Who knew! Is there a list somewhere of gender breakdown by major?

[Anonymous]

Spend more time helping kid to prepare be at college, and less time to prepare getting into college.

As many PPs have said, the college transition is rougher than expected and parents/students are hyper-focused only on entering college rather than surviving college.

Picking the right college for your kid's needs and personality (specific fit vs. overall rank) is key.

[Anonymous]

It is much better to be a big fish in a small pond. The top 10% - 20% at less rigorous HS do much better in college admissions than the top 40% - 50% at the most rigorous ones. With a lot less work and stress.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Boys have an easier admission to LACs, but they DO NOT have an easier admission to business schools and engineering. Example, the upper middle class, northern Virginia white boy with college educated parents who tries to apply to Virginia Tech for business. Better have impeccable stats. Meanwhile, a girl in his class with much lower stats got accepted for a Classics major.

Kid is fine and doing well at an oos school w a great business program, but don’t tell me that all boys have it easier.

Business/ CS / Engineering are male-dominated majors.

Makes sense.

Anybody know if the gender divide applies to other majors? Like I would imagine if a female just HAS to go to a certain college, applying as a philosophy major would be a good strategy. And guys in same situation might want to apply as French majors.

Yes and no. Philosophy and history are not necessarily undersubscribed — and almost never as undersubscribed as any other humanities major. In that sense, being a female philosophy major (although philosophy is a “guy” major) probably gives less of an edge than being a female French major (which is almost exclusively female); with often 2-3 French majors a year, at best, many of these departments are in serious trouble.

To be sure, a genuine male French major would be a unicorn. But I would assume AOs are suspicious of the male actually majoring in French once admitted. To say the least, the male would likely have to do more than take AP French and be co-President of the French club to make that narrative convincing (and other issues to: did the kid take lots of science, computer science, econ and other electives vs, say, a second foreign language, AP music, art etc.?).

A female may not have quite as high a bar of suspicion to overcome. Not only because all modern languages are female-dominated (classics is more balanced), but French is traditionally the most female-dominated— that whole wistful Paris thing.

Philosophy is a male major? Who knew! Is there a list somewhere of gender breakdown by major?

You can see it on the specific school's CDS (last page) or on college raptor (by major).