Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025

[Anonymous]

Lessons:
Kumon/enrichment/culture/language immersion will not guarantee that your kid will get into a top college. I know plenty of kids who did one or all and are going to schools not considered to be top.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1. Some folks don't understand that the game is really in early action. They see early action and regular decision and think they're equal. Many, many schools have much reduced odds by doing regular decision. So if you do regular decision, the kid is doing the same work, essays, etc and have a much lower chance. I've been surprised by the amount of parents who didn't know this. Basically, go in with the mentality that all apps will be due Nov 1 (plus or minus a few weeks). Of course, some don't have early action, so reg decision is fine obviously.

2. For all of the emphasis you'll hear on demonstrated interest, I was suprised how many of the schools my kid applied to didn't track demonstrated interest (you can see on every schools "common data set" whether they consider demonstrated interest in admissions). So check common data set before you force yourself to fly across country to make sure you have demonstrated interest.

3. Before the search begins and all along the way, emphasize over and over that we're not looking for a dream school. We need to identify 4-5 schools you'd be excited to attend. Watching the "dream school" kids be disappointed even when they end up at good schools is rough.

4. Understand your budget before ever letting a kid look at a school. Schools that would never be affordable (even with merit or aid it'd be too much) aren't on the table.

Thank God we didn't follow this advice because DS #1 choice was UC Berkeley and it was simply out our price range even with merit. But he got it with merit that covered more than we could have imagined and made it cheaper than some of the other schools that were within our budget

In state or out?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I love how so many posters think these soft elements have any real bearing on college admissions. It’s wishful thinking. A letter of recommendation could say your kid is the Christ Child but without the grades, courses and test scores they’re not getting in.

Do you not understand how holistic admissions works? Rigor, grades, scores ( if relevant) set the floor. For the highly selective schools, way more kids meet an acceptable threshold across these measures than can be admitted. That’s where these institutional priorities come into play. But you’re probably one of those people who thinks that choosing a kid with a 1520 over one with a 1570 is a potentially discriminatory act.

I don’t even remotely think that. But recommendations are at the bottom of the list. You all just think your kids are so damned special.

LOR are super important. And at some private high schools, there’s a certain teacher whose LOR is especially important. Basically a golden ticket. Too hard to explain but IYKYK.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kindness, really? Maybe I'm being cynical here, but please explain to me how a 17 year old teen demonstrates their kindness in a college app without it sounding disingenuous? And now that this is "a thing," every application will have kids trying to convince AOs how kind they are. It's ridiculous.

Perhaps, kindness isn't exactly the right word. I see it more as caring about others, things like helping kids with homework, being supportive of other kids dealing with personal emotional difficulties, standing up for other kids being bullied and subjected to various kinds of harassment (sometimes as seemingly little as not letting friends kick another kid out of a group), providing rides for classmates who can't otherwise get to games, practices, concerts. Concrete, real world things that don't need to be exaggerated or fictionally created.

My son had a little of this in the background of his essays and LORs, and I think it helped.

Appreciate this. That makes the concept more relatable and my kid has definitely done some of those things you have listed. Can't imagine him mentioning those things on a college app though - he's not one to express his emotions in overt ways.

He has been especially supportive of a close friend whose parents are immigrants, knew nothing about college pathways, programs, classes to take and has been advising him for the past 3 years as well as giving him rides to sports practices/tournaments. I told my son he should mention this on a summer program app he applied for and he simply would not do it. He talked about peer tutoring at school, but that is really a much less personal experience.

Sorry don't mean to derail. It just seems that kids have to do, be, reveal so much even if that's not really a part of their personality.

He is right not to mention helping his friend with "immigrant parents" because he is aware of the concept of "white savior complex"

Not sure about white savior complex, but definitely think he (and I) see it as exploiting a friendship for personal gain. Which is why this idea of kindness + college apps seems very strange to me at least.

You (parent) are supposed to put this into the letter you provide about your son to the Gc. They decide which anecdotes work best depending on college list

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lessons:
Kumon/enrichment/culture/language immersion will not guarantee that your kid will get into a top college. I know plenty of kids who did one or all and are going to schools not considered to be top.

+100

All of this plus include Russian Math, Violin, Eagle Scout and 1500+ SAT. It's all just ... so what. DC is going to a basic state school after a sea of rejections.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lessons:
Kumon/enrichment/culture/language immersion will not guarantee that your kid will get into a top college. I know plenty of kids who did one or all and are going to schools not considered to be top.

+100

All of this plus include Russian Math, Violin, Eagle Scout and 1500+ SAT. It's all just ... so what. DC is going to a basic state school after a sea of rejections.

+200

And stop chasing prestige. Go to the school that is the right fit for your kid. Don’t go into debt for college. The ROI for some schools is not worth it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lessons:
Kumon/enrichment/culture/language immersion will not guarantee that your kid will get into a top college. I know plenty of kids who did one or all and are going to schools not considered to be top.

+100

All of this plus include Russian Math, Violin, Eagle Scout and 1500+ SAT. It's all just ... so what. DC is going to a basic state school after a sea of rejections.

What major?

[Anonymous]

Do extensive research on what colleges’ policies are on granting credits for AP exams & accepting college classes taken while in high school. Policies vary greatly from college to college.

For example, some colleges will give you a whole semester of credit (15+ credits) for a 5 in a foreign language. Other schools might give you maybe 6 credits.

Getting the max amount of credits from all AP exams can make a big difference….allowing students to graduate early, take a lighter courseload per term etc. Also, accounting majors usually need 150 credits to take the CPA exams, & these extra credits can make that easier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lessons:
Kumon/enrichment/culture/language immersion will not guarantee that your kid will get into a top college. I know plenty of kids who did one or all and are going to schools not considered to be top.

+100

All of this plus include Russian Math, Violin, Eagle Scout and 1500+ SAT. It's all just ... so what. DC is going to a basic state school after a sea of rejections.

And mine did none and is going to a top 10 school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lessons:
Kumon/enrichment/culture/language immersion will not guarantee that your kid will get into a top college. I know plenty of kids who did one or all and are going to schools not considered to be top.

+100

All of this plus include Russian Math, Violin, Eagle Scout and 1500+ SAT. It's all just ... so what. DC is going to a basic state school after a sea of rejections.

And mine did none and is going to a top 10 school.

Crazy. Same for mine. Did none of this crazy stuff.
Just did what they loved and wrote about it. No extra math and science. No music.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lessons:
Kumon/enrichment/culture/language immersion will not guarantee that your kid will get into a top college. I know plenty of kids who did one or all and are going to schools not considered to be top.

+100

All of this plus include Russian Math, Violin, Eagle Scout and 1500+ SAT. It's all just ... so what. DC is going to a basic state school after a sea of rejections.

And mine did none and is going to a top 10 school.

Crazy. Same for mine. Did none of this crazy stuff.
Just did what they loved and wrote about it. No extra math and science. No music.

Yup, and my kid was bottle fed, did CIO and went to daycare!