best spacing for kids from financial perspective
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
Looking for advice from BTDT parents and others 
|
Anonymous
| Honestly, just don't have more than one. Its miserable, you'll regret every second of it, and there are no financial breaks. |
Anonymous
|
I think there is no 'magic' spacing financially because just because you want a kid exactly 2 years apart doesn't mean you will get that. I think from a mom perspective, it's been great having the kids 2 years/grades apart since they always have a playmate, they have their own friends and such since they aren't back to back. We know for college we'll have a small break.
Also, from a non-financial way, 2 years apart was nice to be in diapers (2 at the same time) for a bit and in "baby mode" and things like car seats can be reused from one kid to another without things being outdated/expired. 'm amazed with the second one all the things I forgot possibly because of sleep deprovation. But, I am also biased since my parents had kids 2 years apart so to me it's the perfect age apart. From friends I know that had 3 years, their older one had a harder time transitioning than with their kids 2 years apart since 3 is a much different age than 2. Good luck! |
Anonymous
| I had 3 kids in 4 years and i thought it was good because i had a nanny that handled all of them when they were little. Cheaper and easier than day care. Otherwise i am not sure it matters financially. |
Anonymous
|
The answer will depend on your liquidity constraints, personal discount rates, as well as some unknowables like the future increase in tuition fees, daycare costs etc.
But as a first approximation, it doesn't make much difference. If you space them out to avoid paying daycare costs it will just mean you pay for daycare costs, college etc for longer. In any case having a child is a form of financial self-mutilation nowadays. Best to decide when to have them on other criteria - how frazzled are you, how close in age do you want them, etc. |
Anonymous
|
My co-worker has two four years apart. he told me it would have been better if they were closer in age because then he would have had two in college at the same time which would have increased financial aid and reduced total of out of pocket expenses.
But like anything else that is just a sliver of it. having two close in age also means two day cares and you can only max out one dependent care FSA assuming you even have one. In the end its probably a wash with the exception that twins are probably more expensive since all expenses come at once and many things you need two of the same item. |
Anonymous
| My kids are three years apart/ four school years. I'm in a quant field so numbers were important to me. Emotion played a part as I felt that I couldn't handle 2 babies at a time. If you are using daycare unless you are one of those 300k plus households and money doesn't matter tuition goes way down at age 2 per week. The difference was like 450 to 300 per week. 900 biweekly was a majority of my take home so it helped spacing them from a cash flow perspective. Personally, I don't like the idea of a nanny for a baby. Once they are older though having them close in the same school. My kids are in private so 4 school years is great lower school tuition is cheaper than upper school. Upper school is cheaper than college. The other thing you need to think about is if they are too close in age will you have enough emotionally energy to deal with two. I would love a third byt financially and timewise it wouldn't make sense for our family. |
Anonymous
Don't have any, they are a financial drain. 
If you insist of having children: One or two max. One or two years apart. Make sure the second is the same sex and is born in the same season and stay the same size through the seasons as the first one. That way you only have to buy one set of clothes. It is to have a sibling or IL that has a same sex child in the same season. That way you get their hand me downs and all the other crap (swing, bouncy seat...). Make sure your child is born without any extra needs like OT, speech therapy, surgeries, LDs, mental health issues. Make sure they are smart, but not too smart- so they go to an inexpensive state university (not flagship). Make sure they have enough persistence and need for closure so they graduate and get a job and become independent financially at age 21. Utilize the library, rummage sales, all the free museums in town, the free Kennedy Center stuff, the free music lessons on school........... Children cost money. Some cost more than others. SOme cost quite a bit more. You can not plan for all contingencies. You have to jump in the deep end, parenthood isn't a toe dipping slow walk into the pool kind of thing. |
Anonymous
| We put our kids in a room and let them fight for who gets dinner. That way our expenses don't change. The two year old complains constantly that his 16 year old brother doesn't fight fair. |
Anonymous
|
As close together as possible all else being equal. Fewer years with a nanny, and more activities they can do together (soless driving, logistics and extra hands needed to go different directions). Also, discounts for second children at so e camps, schools, etc. also, if you go the private school route and make donations, having kids at a single school, and for the shortest overall time, helps as parents don't really double donations with a second kid.
All this of course only saves a bit at the margins in the scheme of raising kids, and some aspects may not apt to your lifestyle and choices. |
Anonymous
Thanks! |
Anonymous
LOL! |
Anonymous
|