Bedtime-what are we doing wrong ?

[Anonymous]

I’d separate them then see if their schedules need tweaking. I’m not sure they do so I’d separate first to get a better read on it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If there is an option for a separate room, why would you do this to yourself?

He has his own room when he is ready for it. For now we've embraced co-sleeping and the bond it has built. I absolutely love waking up to his smile. This stage will be a memory before we know it.

Now it sounds like it is a problem. No need to run everyone's night if you don't have to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If there is an option for a separate room, why would you do this to yourself?

He has his own room when he is ready for it. For now we've embraced co-sleeping and the bond it has built. I absolutely love waking up to his smile. This stage will be a memory before we know it.

Now it sounds like it is a problem. No need to run everyone's night if you don't have to.

It's the OP who has her kids in their own room and is the one complaining not the person who's posting about co-sleeping. Her evening isn't ruined her child is asleep by 7:45 with minimal fuss and they all seem to enjoy it per the PP. DCUM finds every and any opportunity even if it doesn't make sense to put down on co sleeping

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lights out at 8pm is too late. The two year old needs to be going to bed no later than 7pm, the 4 yr old at 7:30. Shorten the bedtime routine. The process can't be too long.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a 2 and 4 year old who share a room. We have tried to set up their room so they can’t destroy much. Shelves up high that have their toys with a lot of pieces (puzzles) and most other toys in the closet with a child safety knob. We do our bedtime routine and are out of their room by 7:30. Before we leave the room they choose a toy or two from the closet. We also get a new rotation of books from the library every couple of weeks that they have access too.

We don’t care if they fall asleep. Only rule is they can’t leave the room. If they do we walk them back upstairs without really talking or making eye contact and leave them in the room. It’s not always easy but expectations are premeditated resentments, so I just don’t expect they fall asleep by a certain time.

Puzzle pieces up high. I have been doing this wrong for years.

[Anonymous]

Irregardless is not a word and I do care if it is in a dictionary
Educated people correctly say "irrespective." Now that the English grammar lesson is over, I put my kids to bed and told them this was it-- No excuses. No noise. If you can't sleep then no speaking, crying, or laughing. It was bedtime.

[Anonymous]

I'd eliminate the "dad stays a while" from the bedtime routine. And, as others have said, move bedtime earlier.

Also, we had good results with making our child's bedroom a more "sleepy" place to be - that is, removing toys, electronics, TV, and most books and relocating them to living areas.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd eliminate the "dad stays a while" from the bedtime routine. And, as others have said, move bedtime earlier.

Also, we had good results with making our child's bedroom a more "sleepy" place to be - that is, removing toys, electronics, TV, and most books and relocating them to living areas.

This is also what jumped out at me. Good luck OP!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 5 year old son's evening routine:

Dinner around 5pm.

Play time till 630pm then time allowed to put away toys and get ready for bath. He also gets a melatonin gummy before his bath time.

Bath time starts around 645pm and lasts about 20 minutes. Time includes play time with bath toys.

After his bath I brush his teeth, hair, clean ears, and check nails for trimming. He gets his diaper on and night time lotion applied.

In the bedroom I have the blinds and curtains closed. A/C is lowered and the ceiling fan on. Lights are dimmed and tv is set for cartoons lowest volume setting. We co-sleep with our son so he sleeps in our king size bed. Before being tucked in he says his prayers, we read a short story, hugs and kisses. By this time melatonin has kicked in and he's out for the night. I keep a sippy cup of water on the nightstand for him just incase. He's usually a sleep by 745pm. We're free to enjoy the evening. On occasion if he's awake a little longer he will lay quietly until he's ready to sleep. He's not whiny and does not require us to lay with him. Some people may disagree with this routine and that's fine it works for us. He usually wakes up around 7am and will lay quietly if we're sleeping.

You give him melatonin just because?

Melatonin is all natural and has minimal side effects. My son has had zero issues taking it. I can change him before I go to sleep and he doesn't even flinch. I read up on it and asked his Pediatrician before starting him on it.

Melatonin is a powerful hormone and its effects on children are not well understood. Per: https://www.nccih.nih.gov/health/melatonin-what-you-need-to-know

Is melatonin safe for children?

In addition to issues mentioned above, there are some things to consider regarding melatonin’s safety in children.

Melatonin supplements appear to be safe for most children for short-term use, but there aren’t many studies on children and melatonin. Also, there’s little information on the long-term effects of melatonin use in children. Because melatonin is a hormone, it’s possible that melatonin supplements could affect hormonal development, including puberty, menstrual cycles, and overproduction of the hormone prolactin, but we don’t know for sure.

Possible melatonin supplement side effects reported in children have usually been mild and have included:

Drowsiness
Increased bedwetting or urination in the evening
Headache
Dizziness
Agitation.

[Anonymous]

I separated book time and bath time from bedtime. It became - pjs, potty, teeth brushed, get in bed and stay quiet. 2 kids raised this way who went to bed on their own and with only a few phases of pushback when they were little.

Books are too close/intimate/cuddly and make it seem like the kid is being abandoned when done before bed, imho. We would read in the morning before breakfast to wake up or in the afternoon after naps or while dinner was cooking.

Bath was too much fun. So unless necessary, they were done every other day and immediately after dinner or immediately after coming home from school. With bubbles and toys.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 5 year old son's evening routine:

Dinner around 5pm.

Play time till 630pm then time allowed to put away toys and get ready for bath. He also gets a melatonin gummy before his bath time.

Bath time starts around 645pm and lasts about 20 minutes. Time includes play time with bath toys.

After his bath I brush his teeth, hair, clean ears, and check nails for trimming. He gets his diaper on and night time lotion applied.

In the bedroom I have the blinds and curtains closed. A/C is lowered and the ceiling fan on. Lights are dimmed and tv is set for cartoons lowest volume setting. We co-sleep with our son so he sleeps in our king size bed. Before being tucked in he says his prayers, we read a short story, hugs and kisses. By this time melatonin has kicked in and he's out for the night. I keep a sippy cup of water on the nightstand for him just incase. He's usually a sleep by 745pm. We're free to enjoy the evening. On occasion if he's awake a little longer he will lay quietly until he's ready to sleep. He's not whiny and does not require us to lay with him. Some people may disagree with this routine and that's fine it works for us. He usually wakes up around 7am and will lay quietly if we're sleeping.

You give him melatonin just because?

Melatonin is all natural and has minimal side effects. My son has had zero issues taking it. I can change him before I go to sleep and he doesn't even flinch. I read up on it and asked his Pediatrician before starting him on it.

Melatonin is a powerful hormone and its effects on children are not well understood. Per: https://www.nccih.nih.gov/health/melatonin-what-you-need-to-know

Is melatonin safe for children?

In addition to issues mentioned above, there are some things to consider regarding melatonin’s safety in children.

Melatonin supplements appear to be safe for most children for short-term use, but there aren’t many studies on children and melatonin. Also, there’s little information on the long-term effects of melatonin use in children. Because melatonin is a hormone, it’s possible that melatonin supplements could affect hormonal development, including puberty, menstrual cycles, and overproduction of the hormone prolactin, but we don’t know for sure.

Possible melatonin supplement side effects reported in children have usually been mild and have included:

Drowsiness
Increased bedwetting or urination in the evening
Headache
Dizziness
Agitation.

I've done my homework on melatonin and feel comfortable using it on my son.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If there is an option for a separate room, why would you do this to yourself?

He has his own room when he is ready for it. For now we've embraced co-sleeping and the bond it has built. I absolutely love waking up to his smile. This stage will be a memory before we know it.

Now it sounds like it is a problem. No need to run everyone's night if you don't have to.

It's the OP who has her kids in their own room and is the one complaining not the person who's posting about co-sleeping. Her evening isn't ruined her child is asleep by 7:45 with minimal fuss and they all seem to enjoy it per the PP. DCUM finds every and any opportunity even if it doesn't make sense to put down on co sleeping

Hey, everyone has to do whatever works for them, but to be fair, co-sleeping with a 5 year old with the TV on throughout bedtime and needing to use medication to aid sleep is certainly outside of the norm.

[Anonymous]

I would put the 2 year old down before the 4 year old. That gives you time to connect/snuggle/big kid time with the 4 yo and the 2 year old can get enough sleep.

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Honest question- do those of you who feed their children dinner at 5 work outside the home or does a nanny feed them and you eat separately?

I have children the same age and we can’t make it home before 6:30 and then we still have to eat. Though I have thought about packing a bento box and having the kids eat on the way home from daycare and put on pjs there then come home brush teeth and in bed by 7.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would put the 2 year old down before the 4 year old. That gives you time to connect/snuggle/big kid time with the 4 yo and the 2 year old can get enough sleep.

Good luck!

.

Op here we did do this last night (2 yo first at 7:30, one on one time with 4yo till 8) and it helped (4 yo went to bed willingly.). But they still did not fall asleep for another hour and kept each other up giggling). Dh left room with only periodic checks/chastising. Thanks everyone for the advice.