Who is the greatest love of your life? Is it your spouse or someone else?

[Anonymous]

My high school boyfriend. Never had that level of pure passion with anyone else. We were together for 5 years total and broke up in college. We were long distance with different life goals and couldn't make it work. At age 43, we still text/talk pretty frequently. I'm still very close friends with his siblings and his mother too. I'm married with 2 young kids and he's in a relationship but never married. My husband is great but it's always been more of a platonic/safety love. Sometimes I wonder if its possible we could end up together...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son. Definitely.

Same.
My marriage is garbage but I know my entire life I was preparing to be my kids mom.
So I’ll always know that my spouse & I had to meet. It just wasn’t the love marriage that some folks have.

[Anonymous]

The most intense was my high school sweetheart. We'd be a terrible match 20 years later but I was so infatuated with him. My relationship with my spouse is different, not that head over heals type love but were similar so it has worked ok enough so far.

[Anonymous]

College boyfriend. I’m married (14 years) with 2 kids, but that first/foundational love was intense. It is more platonic/secure with my husband. Damn, I miss that boy sometimes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Who is the greatest love of your life? Is it your spouse or someone else?

my spouse, I don’t have any others. So they are first from a pool of one.

[Anonymous]

My husband is great but it's always been more of a platonic/safety love. Sometimes I wonder if its possible we could end up together..

Funny. I could be your husband. My wife talks often about how we are "partners more than anything else." We were watching the new Netflix show about the wife who is attracted to her ExBF and she went on and on about how exciting it was for the female lead.

She never considers that she is not the love of my life, and she likely would not care if she did consider it. Truly, I would be fine with her going back to find the love of her life. She would be very surprised to find that I would enjoy finding lots of non-platonic love.

We will see.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a boyfriend in college before I met my spouse that I had a really deep love for. But we were so young, and he had a military commitment after graduation. We talked about getting married, but we were only 19 & 22, and it just seemed impossible. I was naive enough to think that live like that would come again.
He came back into my life a few years alter before he got married, and we had a lot of long talks, but I was in medical school, and he wanted to be career military. I was still young, and I couldn’t see another path besides the one I was on.
We are both married now. Both have four kids. I haven’t spoken to him since he got married.

+1

Male. I've never loved anyone the way I loved my first serious girlfriend in college. We planned to marry, but our relationship was crushed mostly by distance and poverty. I won't be specific, but I can say that her life in the years after we broke up was pretty difficult and then she died unexpectedly - this was all unrelated to me, but I can't help feeling that things might have been different for her if we'd stayed together. It makes me pretty sad at times. I've been reasonably happily married to another woman for 31 years, 3 kids. But that first woman took something from my heart that has never come back.

+1

This.

[Anonymous]

Yes my spouse. I love him so much and he loves me back just as fiercely. I feel just mindbogglingly lucky about it. I feel like so much of that game of romantic musical chairs you play in your 20s comes down to luck.

[Anonymous]

God and then my husband

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My daughters. I love my spouse, but I feel so deeply for my daughters, and it’s a whole different level of love.

Definitely my kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a boyfriend in college before I met my spouse that I had a really deep love for. But we were so young, and he had a military commitment after graduation. We talked about getting married, but we were only 19 & 22, and it just seemed impossible. I was naive enough to think that live like that would come again.
He came back into my life a few years alter before he got married, and we had a lot of long talks, but I was in medical school, and he wanted to be career military. I was still young, and I couldn’t see another path besides the one I was on.
We are both married now. Both have four kids. I haven’t spoken to him since he got married.

+1

Male. I've never loved anyone the way I loved my first serious girlfriend in college. We planned to marry, but our relationship was crushed mostly by distance and poverty. I won't be specific, but I can say that her life in the years after we broke up was pretty difficult and then she died unexpectedly - this was all unrelated to me, but I can't help feeling that things might have been different for her if we'd stayed together. It makes me pretty sad at times. I've been reasonably happily married to another woman for 31 years, 3 kids. But that first woman took something from my heart that has never come back.

This is very sad and very lovely.

[Anonymous]

My spouse, kids, parents and siblings.

I have been lucky to love and be loved in return.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Daughter.

Aw, that’s sweet. I was gonna say my mom!

[Anonymous]

Definitely my husband. We met young and wished we'd met later on in our careers or when we were more settled. But we both knew lightning didn't strike twice. I truly feel deep down that he's my soul mate. He gets me in a way that no one else ever has and I get him too.

[Anonymous]

Male:
My girlfriend when I was 22 was the most perfect beautiful girl inside and out; I was absolutely head over heels sick in love with her. Before her there were very brief relationships of a month or less, they never really went far but everything clicked with her, she was my first and we did it more times in six months than I think my wife and I have done in 25 years.

We broke up after she got a job as a flight attendant and I moved here to DC, we never saw each other as much even though we figured out all sorts of ways to meet at different airports. Then she just kind of stopped returning my phone calls, we got together one more time to formalize the break up and I’ve never wanted to die more and than I did that day.

I love my wife and in the beginning our love was super intense but it wasn’t as white hot as my first; i’m glad I had her but I often think it’s like the first time you use cocaine, it’s unbelievable the first time and every time after that is less amazing until it becomes no thrill at all.