Can you ever get over your DH saying he comes first to himself even before your only child?

[Anonymous]

I've had to listen to a similar ridiculous pronouncements from my husband over the years. He talks this way when he feels cornered "by circumstances" (but actually because of totally avoidable errors of his own making) when I start a discussion on how we're going to get out of his messes. It's a form of anger and inner guilt. The more strenuously he denies making mistakes, the bigger they are, usually, and then he lashes out with comments like these when I tell him to consider the impact of his behavior on his family. He has NEVER solved these situations on his own, so discussions with me are necessary. They always involve verbal idiocies and sometimes verbal abuse because he apparently can't process any other way.

The really sad part is that my children and I still have a better life sticking with him than living separately. Life has a way of humbling you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I've had to listen to a similar ridiculous pronouncements from my husband over the years. He talks this way when he feels cornered "by circumstances" (but actually because of totally avoidable errors of his own making) when I start a discussion on how we're going to get out of his messes. It's a form of anger and inner guilt. The more strenuously he denies making mistakes, the bigger they are, usually, and then he lashes out with comments like these when I tell him to consider the impact of his behavior on his family. He has NEVER solved these situations on his own, so discussions with me are necessary. They always involve verbal idiocies and sometimes verbal abuse because he apparently can't process any other way.

The really sad part is that my children and I still have a better life sticking with him than living separately. Life has a way of humbling you.

What do you mean “Better life”?

Child support payments would maintain the quality of life. And you and your kids wouldn’t be subject to neglect, verbal abuse, poor communication, etc.
he sounds bipolar and on the spectrum. Plus a narcissist.

[Anonymous]

Plus would avoid all his mistakes, mishaps, lies, cover ups, deflections, brain farts and setbacks he causes.

Careless, thoughtless, mindless people are very difficult to live with. I hope you are in therapy.

[Anonymous]

My spouse says all kid of canned socially acceptable answers and then goes and does the opposite, consistently. No one I. The house believes a word he says on anything.