“Happy Mother’s Day” posts on FB/Instagram

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I haven’t posted things like that in maybe 10 years. Now I have a mentally ill teen, and I realize more in depth how hurtful those posts can be. My day turned out much better than expected, but I still didn’t post about it. I’m sure there was a mom who didn’t get a card, a hug, and an hour of tv together on the couch, and I don’t need to make her feel worse.

I know how you must feel. My DS also had severe mental health issues as a teen and being a mother during that period was profoundly painful and difficult. My heart goes out to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s weird to be offended even though I had a disappointing Mother’s Day. I’m happy for my friends who had fun and was excited to see all the different ways people celebrated as mother’s and for their mothers. Obviously if it was too painful I would have avoided it. If we are worried about hurting every person’s feelings on every occasion than we couldn’t ever post any happy memories.

This is too sensible a post for DCUM. You really ought to see yourself out.

[Anonymous]

I posted a happy Mother’s Day to my mom with a pic of us 30 years ago. I didn’t add commentary. She likes things like that, so that’s why I posted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Weird to be offended or hurt by people’s happiness.

That’s the ultimate equity - if one person doesn’t get to enjoy something, no one does.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s weird to be offended even though I had a disappointing Mother’s Day. I’m happy for my friends who had fun and was excited to see all the different ways people celebrated as mother’s and for their mothers. Obviously if it was too painful I would have avoided it. If we are worried about hurting every person’s feelings on every occasion than we couldn’t ever post any happy memories.

Fair enough- if you can’t take the heat get out of the kitchen!

[Anonymous]

No posts for me. I am over posting crap to get likes. So middle school. Now, i have graduated to high school. Haha! I am also over holiday's too. I was over holiday's when I lost my mom and brother. It is too hard for me so I barely go on social media until those day's are over.

[Anonymous]

I understand why people post these. It feels good to share something positive, it's a way of acknowledging loved ones in a public way, I think individually these posts can be very sweet an innocuous.

But I also understand why people don't like them. I don't think it's about the individual posts. It's that there are a lot of them and they all strike the same general tone. It gives the illusion that "everyone" is doing the same things -- has a happy family, has a good relationship with their mom and kids, has time off to celebrate, has money to celebrate in a fun way, etc. It feels monolithic. And if it's a hard or disappointing day for you for any reason, I can see how uncomfortable that can be.

And that's why I don't post this stuff anymore. I'll share a pic with a group text, especially my group of fellow moms with same-age kids. But I don't post this stuff to social media anymore because I think think when all these posts get aggregated together, it can be hurtful. No one individual intends it that way, of course. It's just all thos posts are aggregated, the result is something that isn't very inclusive of others and can be hard for people who are struggling.

But no way to stop it. So yes, if this stuff bothers you, it's good to learn just not to look.

[Anonymous]

https://www.instagram.com/p/COk3TvYLVQ6/?igshid=1uspu3z8k5uke

I liked Anne Lamott’s Mother’s Day Post. She (humorously) discuses what people may be tying to articulate here.

[Anonymous]

So now we are trying for equity on Mother’s Day?

[Anonymous]

I stopped posting about Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, anniversaries. It just feels unnecessary and insensitive. Although, even though my dad passed away 2 years ago, it doesn’t upset me when others post on Father’s Day. Here’s what did end up bothering me after losing my dad - people posting about recovering loved ones by saying they pulled through because of all the prayers or because they are a fighter, etc. As if surviving is based on a popularity contest and only weak people die. I’m not usually sensitive about stuff like that, but I found those comments to be pretty upsetting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So now we are trying for equity on Mother’s Day?

That word doesn't mean what you think it means. Bring it back to the FCPS forums, buh bye

[Anonymous]

I didn’t post but I think if a slightly braggy happy mother’s day post offends/hurts someone, that person really should get off social media for their mental health.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I posted a happy Mother’s Day to my mom with a pic of us 30 years ago. I didn’t add commentary. She likes things like that, so that’s why I posted.

+1 I did this because she likes the public acknowledgement.

[Anonymous]

It's a recognized holiday, I didn't post but expected the divulge of token sharing (shrugs).
Doesn't bother me, scrolling is your friend, but I do enjoy the cute home-made gifts for mom's of littles, too precious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s weird to be offended even though I had a disappointing Mother’s Day. I’m happy for my friends who had fun and was excited to see all the different ways people celebrated as mother’s and for their mothers. Obviously if it was too painful I would have avoided it. If we are worried about hurting every person’s feelings on every occasion than we couldn’t ever post any happy memories.

This is too sensible a post for DCUM. You really ought to see yourself out.

+1

This PP is not from here - we'll make her stone cold and jaded before too long. How DARE she be happy for other people??!!