Awkward situation with neighbor

[Anonymous]

She should have called you, her 14-year-old could be super responsible but your agreement was for her t be watching the kids, so she should have okayed it with you.


That said this is not worth blowing up the neighborhood over.

[Anonymous]

It’s not about how old the babysitter is.... it’s that the mother didn’t clear it with the OP first. 14 may be old enough to sit, but they are not a legal adult. Wow, super weird she didn’t let you know.

[Anonymous]

Eh I probably would be livid if it was my first child. Now that my kids are older, this would be no big deal.

There are a lot of parents who let kids wander the neighborhood alone. They were just in their backyard.

I remember texting mom that I had to go pick up my daughter from preschool and if it was ok to leave kids home for 15 min alone. She leaves her 11 yo home for errands all the time and was fine. Almost seemed to be surprised I would even ask.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Eh I probably would be livid if it was my first child. Now that my kids are older, this would be no big deal.

There are a lot of parents who let kids wander the neighborhood alone. They were just in their backyard.

I remember texting mom that I had to go pick up my daughter from preschool and if it was ok to leave kids home for 15 min alone. She leaves her 11 yo home for errands all the time and was fine. Almost seemed to be surprised I would even ask.

But you did ask. That’s the difference.

[Anonymous]

14 yo is plenty old enough. Don’t make a big deal out of it. Keep it in the past and love forward with your neighbor like it’s no big deal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I definitely think you’re overreacting.

Agree

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s not about how old the babysitter is.... it’s that the mother didn’t clear it with the OP first. 14 may be old enough to sit, but they are not a legal adult. Wow, super weird she didn’t let you know.

This. If it was understood that one adult/person was watching my child, I would just like a heads up that a different person is now watching my child.

[Anonymous]

Eh, not ok. Your neighbor should have asked you if it was ok before leaving your child under someone else's care.

[Anonymous]

Yes, out of courtesy the neighbor should have contacted you to say she was running an errand.

And yes, you’re overreacting about a 14 year old watching two elementary aged kids. It’s totally fine. When I was 14, I was babysitting toddlers while their parents went out an hour away. I made so much money every weekend.

[Anonymous]

I might say something like “Hey, so I just want to check in about the other day when Larla was over your house. I’m totally fine with Penelope watching her. Next time can you just give me a heads up? A text is fine. That way I know to listen out for my phone in case Penelope needs something.”

“Sure. Not a problem.”

“Great. So can you believe school is finally opening...”

[Anonymous]

Agree with others you’ve overreacted and should try to smooth things over or be pegged as the overprotective crazy mom. She should have mentioned, but a 14 year old is old enough to watch 2 six year olds. My 14 year old babysits kids that age and younger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:13 is the legal age in Montgomery County. A responsible 14 year old should have no trouble doing this. But I agree that the parent should have been courteous enough to give you a heads up.

It's not a problem, OP. Just be friendly, and know that in a pinch, your child will be watched by the older sister when she goes to their house!

I think it’s more likely that OPs child will be persona non grata at the neighbor’s house from here on out.

that would be an over-reaction on the neighbor's part

[Anonymous]

I started babysitting kids younger than that at 12 years old. And it was at night in an world without cellphones.

[Anonymous]

Just by the amount of detail in this post, there is tons of over-reacting. The other parent should have mentioned that she was running out, but you should know there is an older sibling of you know the family, and it seems like this should have come up in normal conversation. Is this even a real post/question?

[Anonymous]

I don't know. I agree that 14 is fine to babysit, but I would be upset if the person I thought was watching my child changed without notice. If went over there and it was her college best friend, her brother who lives 15 min away, her cat sitter, her cousins's hair stylist. These are not people I know or made a decision to leave my kid with.

I don't think it was an overreaction to take your kid home when the parent you left them with is not there and did not mention it. Totally different if when you drop off or make the plan mom says "going to get my hair cut at 3. Larla will be watching kids until I get back" but I should always know who will be or will not be home.

I also imagine you got there, saw the sister and said "ok sally time to go home" and then texted "took sally home. Thanks!" If you screamed, grabbed your child and then rage texted, that is different and you need to smooth things over