I hate being a parent right now

[Anonymous]

I’m struggling, too. Covid has basically closed everything I used to take my oldest to and now with a six-month-old our places to go are even more limited. We bought a condo in town (not DC) with virtually no outdoor space right before covid hit thinking it was no big deal since we had so many parks, playgrounds and libraries, and kiddy gyms within walking distance. Pretty much all but one park are closed and have been closed for a year.

I feel like I’m wishing away my baby’s early months. I’m tired of being isolated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel like I’m going crazy. I’ve been keeping everyone going, including DH, for almost a year and I hate being a parent and I’m not even sure I like my family anymore. This is so hard.

Then get a divorce and stop complaining.

[Anonymous]

Getting strong vibes from this right now

[Anonymous]

I’m the opposite. I know it sounds terrible, but I’ve really enjoyed this period of closeness and bonding with my family. Really don’t want it to end, and for the commute and never-ending social obligations to come back...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m the opposite. I know it sounds terrible, but I’ve really enjoyed this period of closeness and bonding with my family. Really don’t want it to end, and for the commute and never-ending social obligations to come back...

Read the room, PP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I acknowledge that OP isn’t alone and my heart breaks for all of you, but I can’t relate. Maybe it’s because I’ve had a objectively really difficult life: ACES score 9, stalked by two different men (neither romantic partners) and kidnapped by one, abusive first marriage, secondary infertility, medically fragile child, almost died 4 times, diagnosed with three serious chronic health conditions, sexual harassed at work, witness to horrific workplace violence, adult child raped, second husband diagnosed with colon cancer, abusive father has dementia... all of this has pushed me to find joy where I can. This year has seen my parenting repertoire expand and my family is even closer than before. It opened my heart to open our home to a boy who needed a forever family. I’m not glad that the pandemic happened, but I don’t wish I wasn’t parenting.

Why do you assume that none of these posters haven't also dealt with stuff like this? You have no idea what other people are dealing with on top of the pandemic. It's incredibly privileged to come out of this year and say you've enjoyed it.

I'm trying to imagine being so out there that you feel this poster is "privileged".

It has been a privilege just to make it through this year, alive, family alive, still have an income.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel like I’m going crazy. I’ve been keeping everyone going, including DH, for almost a year and I hate being a parent and I’m not even sure I like my family anymore. This is so hard.

Then get a divorce and stop complaining.

Cool. Good advice! Divorce really does solve all problems.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I absolutely hate parenting as of January 2021. I did my best the rest of this pandemic, but Im tapped out. I have nothing left to give my kids in terms of attention, entertainment, school help. Nothing.

NP here. SAME. I have had a breakdown every weekend for 4 weekends now - this morning is the 4th. I cannot take this any longer. I am so angry with my 10 yo, who I know is struggling. I feel like DH undermines me with parenting. I am tired of preparing meals, ordering out, having nowhere to go. I hope it's the weather that has gotten to me, and that I can come up with this. But honestly, I'm wondering what the minimum is that would be required to get me locked up in a mental hospital for a week. Drug me, put me in a bed. I don't effing care.

And yes, I'm seeing a therapist. Kids are in therapy. DH is in therapy. It feels like an effing disaster around here.

[Anonymous]

I know not everyone is in the same boat, but here is what I have done to make life more bearable this past year:

1. Exercise - take long walks and weight training
2. Eat healthy - lot of veggies and eating with intention
3. Take care of any health issues - don't put aside visiting doctors
4. Set goals for projects around the house - that way I feel a sense of accomplishment
5. Get to know my neighbors better and hang out outside where it is much safer - we have done lots of this for a year and it's been a lifesaver
6. Touch base with family - we have done a lot of Facetime and for local family, outside with masks around a firepit
7. Plan for "after" - even if we don't know when after might actually be, make some mental plans to look forward to
8. Spend dedicated time with the kids - really enjoy the time together because it is fleeting
9. Pursue hobbies
10. Subscribe to a meal kit plan - this has been a lifesaver from having to cook the same things over and over again

Mom of 2 kids; DH and I both work from home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I acknowledge that OP isn’t alone and my heart breaks for all of you, but I can’t relate. Maybe it’s because I’ve had a objectively really difficult life: ACES score 9, stalked by two different men (neither romantic partners) and kidnapped by one, abusive first marriage, secondary infertility, medically fragile child, almost died 4 times, diagnosed with three serious chronic health conditions, sexual harassed at work, witness to horrific workplace violence, adult child raped, second husband diagnosed with colon cancer, abusive father has dementia... all of this has pushed me to find joy where I can. This year has seen my parenting repertoire expand and my family is even closer than before. It opened my heart to open our home to a boy who needed a forever family. I’m not glad that the pandemic happened, but I don’t wish I wasn’t parenting.

Why do you assume that none of these posters haven't also dealt with stuff like this? You have no idea what other people are dealing with on top of the pandemic. It's incredibly privileged to come out of this year and say you've enjoyed it.

I'm trying to imagine being so out there that you feel this poster is "privileged".

NP. I'm sorry for all that PP has gone through, but I don't know how this is helpful. OP is struggling and your response is a list of your trauma followed by saying that you can't relate to them and that you are a better parent than ever? I don't see how this is helpful to OP, or relevant. Tone deaf at best, narcissistic at worst.

Totally narcissistic. Next time that pp should keep scrolling if the post doesnt apply to her.

The person who swooped in to call someone posting a list of their personal traumas "privileged" is really who should have just kept on scrolling. I know sometimes it's just too hard to pass up to that chance though.

[Anonymous]

I've had a best case scenario this year, and will treasure some of the togetherness, the lack of commute, but...

In normal times, the best part of my day hands-down was picking the kids up from school. Seeing them bound down the hallway, getting that hug, holding hands as we walked to the car. All of my work stress melted away.

Now, I start fantasizing about getting into bed to watch TV by 3PM most days. And don't get to until 11, when work/dinner/chores/clean-up/whatever else gets checked off, and I'm too tired to make it through a full show most nights. Rinse, repeat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I absolutely hate parenting as of January 2021. I did my best the rest of this pandemic, but Im tapped out. I have nothing left to give my kids in terms of attention, entertainment, school help. Nothing.

NP here. SAME. I have had a breakdown every weekend for 4 weekends now - this morning is the 4th. I cannot take this any longer. I am so angry with my 10 yo, who I know is struggling. I feel like DH undermines me with parenting. I am tired of preparing meals, ordering out, having nowhere to go. I hope it's the weather that has gotten to me, and that I can come up with this. But honestly, I'm wondering what the minimum is that would be required to get me locked up in a mental hospital for a week. Drug me, put me in a bed. I don't effing care.

And yes, I'm seeing a therapist. Kids are in therapy. DH is in therapy. It feels like an effing disaster around here.

I am the OP and I am sending you a huge hug. You are not alone!!

[Anonymous]

If it rains or sleets on another weekend day I'm going to lose my mind. We just can't be cooped up inside and there's no where else to go. My kids even LIKE playing in the rain, but only for like 30 min (and I'm miserable in the rain). Whereas we would hike for 2 hours or play for a few hours with bikes, chalk, scooters and such.

My kids haven't been inside a fun play place, a playdate (no one will do one with us) or even a museum for a year. It's just hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't figure out if I'm just naturally a terrible parent (short tempered, no patience, attached to my laptop, want everyone to just go away) or if this is a Covid thing (and, if the latter, if it's reversible).

Same. I thought I was ok. Then snapped and hid in my room for an hour. It wasn’t even a bad day, I’m just toast.

I have been pleasantly surprised that the more I disappear (meaning inside the house, but hiding!) the more my kids seek out my husband instead of me! It's taken a solid 6 months for them to ask where daddy has gone when he leaves their sight, not just me. Of course my 6 year old has also caught on that I often am in the basement hiding, so will come find me. But it's getting less frequent.

My childcare is going up this week, and in April my youngest will go back full time, and I am GLEEFUL. Of course still a but nervous about covid myself, but at least I don't have to worry about killing people I know since the number of vaccinated people keeps going up. Hopefully by summer I'll be among them. BABYSITTERS BUCKLE UP I AM CALLING YOU!!!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know not everyone is in the same boat, but here is what I have done to make life more bearable this past year:

1. Exercise - take long walks and weight training
2. Eat healthy - lot of veggies and eating with intention
3. Take care of any health issues - don't put aside visiting doctors
4. Set goals for projects around the house - that way I feel a sense of accomplishment
5. Get to know my neighbors better and hang out outside where it is much safer - we have done lots of this for a year and it's been a lifesaver
6. Touch base with family - we have done a lot of Facetime and for local family, outside with masks around a firepit
7. Plan for "after" - even if we don't know when after might actually be, make some mental plans to look forward to
8. Spend dedicated time with the kids - really enjoy the time together because it is fleeting
9. Pursue hobbies
10. Subscribe to a meal kit plan - this has been a lifesaver from having to cook the same things over and over again

Mom of 2 kids; DH and I both work from home.

I know you mean well but hearing "exercise and eat well" after a year of DROWNING EVERY SINGLE DAY makes me want to reach through the screen and smack you silly.

I barely get to go to the bathroom alone. You think I am eating with intention or weight training?!!! I am an angry soft dumpling of a person right now, who is slowly being pecked to death by pigeons (my children).