Separation after new baby?

[Anonymous]

Meant to add I agree he sounds like a canine. I hope he learns how to respect and care for you in the way he would want anyone with honor and dignity to do for your child. You don’t have to marry or be in a relationship to do that. I hope you two can find that path as parents. If that is not possible, put up guardrails along the way on the curvy parts of the highway and don’t let him derail your journey. 💛

[Anonymous]

Inspiration. Ciara and Russell. Truly loving couple with honor in their journey and humility around their challenges.

[Anonymous]

I separated from my ex when DD was 6 months old. It worked in our favor. DD didn’t remember us together so she takes it as normal that she has two homes so there was no transition issues. We were incompatible as a romantic couple (got along well, didn’t fight, but I was not attracted to him and has settled for him bc he was great otherwise). DD is now 5. We get along really well and coparent with 50/50 custody, live about a mile apart. We failed at marriage but are crushing divorce

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not married, not together for long before pregnancy.... by separate, I mean no longer together. I know it’s not a good situation, anyone else separate early on and have any suggestions for how to cope?

Why did you decide to have a baby?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not married, not together for long before pregnancy.... by separate, I mean no longer together. I know it’s not a good situation, anyone else separate early on and have any suggestions for how to cope?

Why did you decide to have a baby?

Not OP but this question always annoys me. Not everyone “decides” to have a baby. Many pregnancies are unexpected. Even now. As many as 50% of all US pregnancies are not planned. Birth control is nowhere near 100% effective. This question is rude and does not matter. Neither of my kids were planned. It happens. Don’t assume it is always an intentional choice. In any case, it is none of your business.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not married, not together for long before pregnancy.... by separate, I mean no longer together. I know it’s not a good situation, anyone else separate early on and have any suggestions for how to cope?

Why did you decide to have a baby?

Not OP but this question always annoys me. Not everyone “decides” to have a baby. Many pregnancies are unexpected. Even now. As many as 50% of all US pregnancies are not planned. Birth control is nowhere near 100% effective. This question is rude and does not matter. Neither of my kids were planned. It happens. Don’t assume it is always an intentional choice. In any case, it is none of your business.

Word. Can OP live?

[Anonymous]

This is OP. I am financially secure and .... it was actually a planned pregnancy. At the time, it seemed like we would just get married post pandemic, no rush, we were secure. I think I am looking for morale support from others who have been a solo parent with a young infant that it is doable. I don’t know anyone else to talk to who has been there/done that and can say it worked okay. So I guess .... just knowing it can be okay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not married, not together for long before pregnancy.... by separate, I mean no longer together. I know it’s not a good situation, anyone else separate early on and have any suggestions for how to cope?

Why did you decide to have a baby?

Not OP but this question always annoys me. Not everyone “decides” to have a baby. Many pregnancies are unexpected. Even now. As many as 50% of all US pregnancies are not planned. Birth control is nowhere near 100% effective. This question is rude and does not matter. Neither of my kids were planned. It happens. Don’t assume it is always an intentional choice. In any case, it is none of your business.

Even if you accidentally get pregnant you still are deciding to have the baby...that is a choice even if getting pregnant was not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I personally think it too early and premature to separate with a baby--and I am divorced. I waited too long (10 years of marriage). Don't do that. But I would not make any permanent decisions until the baby is 2 or 3 years old. You are in the hardest stage. You have to be really honest about your situation that if it is really the relationship not working or the stress of having a child.

+1
That said, if you know you need to go, you know. I wish I had some advice that would make this easier, OP. Best wishes to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I am financially secure and .... it was actually a planned pregnancy. At the time, it seemed like we would just get married post pandemic, no rush, we were secure. I think I am looking for morale support from others who have been a solo parent with a young infant that it is doable. I don’t know anyone else to talk to who has been there/done that and can say it worked okay. So I guess .... just knowing it can be okay.

Immediate PP here.

It's hard, OP. I left when my child was 2.5. There wasn't anything easy about it, but we were OK. We weren't in a pandemic, though. If you need to be OK, you'll be OK. People make it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not married, not together for long before pregnancy.... by separate, I mean no longer together. I know it’s not a good situation, anyone else separate early on and have any suggestions for how to cope?

Why did you decide to have a baby?

Why do people insist on asking stupid questions that have literally nothing to do with the OP's situation. Just stop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not married, not together for long before pregnancy.... by separate, I mean no longer together. I know it’s not a good situation, anyone else separate early on and have any suggestions for how to cope?

Why did you decide to have a baby?

Not OP but this question always annoys me. Not everyone “decides” to have a baby. Many pregnancies are unexpected. Even now. As many as 50% of all US pregnancies are not planned. Birth control is nowhere near 100% effective. This question is rude and does not matter. Neither of my kids were planned. It happens. Don’t assume it is always an intentional choice. In any case, it is none of your business.

Even if you accidentally get pregnant you still are deciding to have the baby...that is a choice even if getting pregnant was not.

It does not feel like a choice if you are raised religiously (not OP)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I am financially secure and .... it was actually a planned pregnancy. At the time, it seemed like we would just get married post pandemic, no rush, we were secure. I think I am looking for morale support from others who have been a solo parent with a young infant that it is doable. I don’t know anyone else to talk to who has been there/done that and can say it worked okay. So I guess .... just knowing it can be okay.

if it makes you feel any better, i was like a single parent while married. you will be ok.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Inspiration. Ciara and Russell. Truly loving couple with honor in their journey and humility around their challenges.

So tired of Wilson's "I'm so cool,. I'm so hot, I'm so perfect routine." Plus, can't stand women who only use one name. Get over yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not married, not together for long before pregnancy.... by separate, I mean no longer together. I know it’s not a good situation, anyone else separate early on and have any suggestions for how to cope?

Why did you decide to have a baby?

Why do people insist on asking stupid questions that have literally nothing to do with the OP's situation. Just stop.

It’s a legitimate question. If you decided it was the right time, your finances were in order, you were in the right relationship (regardless of marital status), then there’s your starting point for support. If it was none of those things and a one night stand, then you’re starting from a very different place.