Be graceful when I decline your COVID birthday party

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, yes it is because of Covid-19.

I can't really tell you to your face that I've lost all respect for you because you just invited me to a party during a pandemic, and I know social distancing won't be implemented, can I?

So we're not going to see much of each other in the future.

We are still social distancing so aren't going to parties, but I strongly disagree that a party invitation now means that you should have no respect for the person and won't be seeing them in the future. That's a really strong judgment to make when the information has been so mixed, and you don't know what what safety procedures will be followed at the party you are not attending. We don't attend because better safe than sorry, but I believe that it is possible to have a pretty safe socially distanced outside party.

This! Geez. I decline a most invitations but I don’t think the hosts are wrong to take different risks than I do.

[Anonymous]

Do as I say, not as I do, huh? What an ungraceful lecture on grace.

[Anonymous]

The reason that you are angry is that some part of you is uncomfortable drawing the boundary. When I say no and I'm comfortable with it, I don't get frazzled when someone pushes back. I just repeat the no answer and move on.

[Anonymous]

Agree OP.

[Anonymous]

It drives me nuts when we can't make it to a party and the host continues to try to figure out a way we can somehow make it. This is not a covid-specific thing. (We would definitely attend a backyard kid party at this point.) People should be able to accept a person's no and leave it at that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It drives me nuts when we can't make it to a party and the host continues to try to figure out a way we can somehow make it. This is not a covid-specific thing. (We would definitely attend a backyard kid party at this point.) People should be able to accept a person's no and leave it at that.

So this. "Can you just come for the cake?!" "Can you stop by later for dessert?"

Like, no. It's just a no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When people send regrets to your kid's birthday party in the time of COVID, your only option is to accept that gracefully. Do not push, inquire, wheedle or whine. Do not ask "is this just because of coronavirus"?

I said no thank you, and Happy Birthday, Billy. Drop it. I owe you no explanation. I owe you no reassurance.

No, you "come on," I don't need another rundown of how "safe" your event is. You do you. We're not coming.

You are right, OP!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why can't you decline politely like you would have pre covid?

"Sorry we won't be able to make it. I hope Larlo has a wonderful Birthday!"

Did you read the OP? That's exactly what transpired and OP said the person was pushing back, not taking a polite "no thanks' for an answer.

"No thank you" to an invite is confrontational and looking for an argument.

OP here, my exact words were:

"I'm sorry, we can't make it. Happy Birthday, Billy!"

Ok, I take back my comment!

I would say to them when they ask again "As I said, we aren't able to come."

[Anonymous]

I've lost all respect for you because you just invited me to a party during a pandemic

This is unfair
Without more information, this is unfair
You're a jerk

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When people send regrets to your kid's birthday party in the time of COVID, your only option is to accept that gracefully. Do not push, inquire, wheedle or whine. Do not ask "is this just because of coronavirus"?

I said no thank you, and Happy Birthday, Billy. Drop it. I owe you no explanation. I owe you no reassurance.

No, you "come on," I don't need another rundown of how "safe" your event is. You do you. We're not coming.

\

I agree, but wonder if people are trying to figure out how they themselves should be asking?
Has this happened more than once? Are people actually holding parties ni this time?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It drives me nuts when we can't make it to a party and the host continues to try to figure out a way we can somehow make it. This is not a covid-specific thing. (We would definitely attend a backyard kid party at this point.) People should be able to accept a person's no and leave it at that.

So this. "Can you just come for the cake?!" "Can you stop by later for dessert?"

Like, no. It's just a no.

THIS. The reason does not matter. It is so rude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When people send regrets to your kid's birthday party in the time of COVID, your only option is to accept that gracefully. Do not push, inquire, wheedle or whine. Do not ask "is this just because of coronavirus"?

I said no thank you, and Happy Birthday, Billy. Drop it. I owe you no explanation. I owe you no reassurance.

No, you "come on," I don't need another rundown of how "safe" your event is. You do you. We're not coming.

\

I agree, but wonder if people are trying to figure out how they themselves should be asking?
Has this happened more than once? Are people actually holding parties ni this time?

Sadly, yes. We attended a culdesac party for a kid. Parents invited way more people than they implied when they invited us. Then let their kid blow out the candles on the cake before serving it. We left.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When people send regrets to your kid's birthday party in the time of COVID, your only option is to accept that gracefully. Do not push, inquire, wheedle or whine. Do not ask "is this just because of coronavirus"?

I said no thank you, and Happy Birthday, Billy. Drop it. I owe you no explanation. I owe you no reassurance.

No, you "come on," I don't need another rundown of how "safe" your event is. You do you. We're not coming.

\

I agree, but wonder if people are trying to figure out how they themselves should be asking?
Has this happened more than once? Are people actually holding parties ni this time?

Sadly, yes. We attended a culdesac party for a kid. Parents invited way more people than they implied when they invited us. Then let their kid blow out the candles on the cake before serving it. We left.

Am I unrealistic that I think it's kind of crazy you've attended even one? How many people did you think would attend?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When people send regrets to your kid's birthday party in the time of COVID, your only option is to accept that gracefully. Do not push, inquire, wheedle or whine. Do not ask "is this just because of coronavirus"?

I said no thank you, and Happy Birthday, Billy. Drop it. I owe you no explanation. I owe you no reassurance.

No, you "come on," I don't need another rundown of how "safe" your event is. You do you. We're not coming.

+1. I could not agree more. Have some class!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Billy's mom wants to know whether you're extra conservative about social distancing, or if your kid just hates Billy and doesn't want to go, or ever want to play with him any more.

OP how old is your kid?

If your child and Billy were good friends, you would know.