How did you decide how many kids to have?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For the people who said “god decided”, how many kids would you have before you decided to take matters into your own hands? Or would you just keep having unprotected sex forever?

My husband has the same “let god decide mindset” but the thought of 4+ kids terrifies me.

The thought of that family with 19 kids would scare the daylights out of me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When DS was 6 months DH was presented with an amazing opportunity at work. A few months into it we realized that things like this wouldn't be possible with more than 1 kid (we got to live abroad and do a lot of traveling) which made us sit down and discuss the things we'd be able to do with one kid vs two. We realized we would rather live the life we could provide for one vs the life with 2. Ds is 8 now and zero regrets.

thank you for sharing. i think this might be us. i feel like we are at a crossroads and i am approaching 40 so we should decide soon. i like the "we realized we'd rather live the life we could provide for one vs the life with 2"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When DS was 6 months DH was presented with an amazing opportunity at work. A few months into it we realized that things like this wouldn't be possible with more than 1 kid (we got to live abroad and do a lot of traveling) which made us sit down and discuss the things we'd be able to do with one kid vs two. We realized we would rather live the life we could provide for one vs the life with 2. Ds is 8 now and zero regrets.

thank you for sharing. i think this might be us. i feel like we are at a crossroads and i am approaching 40 so we should decide soon. i like the "we realized we'd rather live the life we could provide for one vs the life with 2"

You're welcome. It was kind of nice too because it also made us evaluate what we saw as priorities as a family, not just as a couple. And that has really helped us navigate situations that have arose (dh getting a huge promotion but would have meant him working crazy hours, deciding where to settle for the school years, etc). Plus there are times I will see DH holding a friend's baby and think "well ..." But then I remember "well we couldn't have done X if we had another kid"

[Anonymous]

We ended up with twins on the first go-around, and the delivery went poorly leading to a hysterectomy. So, we got two.

[Anonymous]

I was one of three and that’s what I hoped for. My husband was happy with two but he said I had the bigger vote and he’d be fine so we had three.

[Anonymous]

We talked about it. I wanted 2, DH wanted 3. After we had the first, DH changed his mind and wanted 2. Lol