Am I wrong to be annoyed by copycat sister?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would expect my sister, who grew up in the same city, in the same SES, with the same mom, who is the same race, to have very similar style to me. I mean, really??

Reading books is also not really a niche hobby.

I don't think she's copying you at all...

Art is the standard hobby for kids. That’s as generic as it gets. Same for reading. I could see how she could have a similar style given you’re sisters and probably have a similar build/hair/etc and the same mom.

It doesn’t sound like she’s copying you... I don’t know if that makes it better or worse in your eyes...

[Anonymous]

I hattteeeee basic beeyotches who think they are being "copied" when other people have the same middle-class life they do.

If you shop off the rack, you do not have a Unique Style. No one "copied" your Kate Spade shoes or your Marc Jacobs eyewear.

No one "copied" your Starbucks order. Oh you ask for caramel drizzle on your PSL?! DO TELL.

You are like the 13yo who is so unique that he went Goth: which has its very own uniform, soundtrack, and catch phrases.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did she also follow the same career as you?

This.

If you’re a nurse and your sister is an engineer who likes to read, you need to grow up... However if you’re a nurse and your sister decides to become a Nurse Anesthesiologist, it’s a lot more concerning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did she also follow the same career as you?

This.

If you’re a nurse and your sister is an engineer who likes to read, you need to grow up... However if you’re a nurse and your sister decides to become a Nurse Anesthesiologist, it’s a lot more concerning.

What, like the Bronte sisters?

Like the Hadid sisters?

Like the Williams sisters?

Like the Kardashian sisters?

Like the two sisters in Wilson Phillips?

Like Michelle Kwan and Karen Kwan, and Gracie Gold and Carly Gold?

Plus, like nurse is so unique? Like that's not a top 10 answer when you ask a little girl what she wants to be when she grows up?

[Anonymous]

My sister and I had the same upbringing. We ended up in two different fields, but either of us could predictably have ended up in any of the following, based on our family and connections:

Lutheran church
Writing/literature/journalism
Medicine
Swimming
Merchandising/retail
Art
Indiana politics

[Anonymous]

It's a form of flattery. You need help.

[Anonymous]

If you dated a guy and then she started dating the same guy... now you might have a case! If you bought a green toyota camry and then she got the same exact model and green toyota camry... well, that might give me pause. But, she started to read?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get help. This is a you problem.

Sorry OP but I tend to agree. You aren't mad she is copying you (which reading isnt really copying is it?) You are insecure because she is "better" than you and you want something to be "yours" that you are better at than her. Comparison will rob you of everything that is cool about you. Every person I know who strives to be unique is unhappy, bc they aren't focused on what they care about or love to do, just that it's out of the norm to make them feel cool.

There is a lot to be said for just being a content basic bitch sometimes

[Anonymous]

People on here are ridiculous. OP, that must be annoying. Keep finding things you enjoy and live your life happily.

[Anonymous]

OP, the examples you gave don't hold much weight. As PPs have noted, reading and art are extremely common hobbies and unless you have a very, very unique sense of fashion, a lot of clothes are similar.

At any rate, it's normal for younger siblings to look up to older siblings, and it's normal for the older ones to be annoyed. This is the case with literally every set of siblings I know. I have a friend who is 45 and is still crying about how her younger sister copied her when they were younger. I think she (and you) probably need to get a grip and get over it. Find something else to focus on.

[Anonymous]

This is interesting, my husband has the same issue with his brother. But his brother is the older sibling who is constantly copying my husband. They are very close in age, 14 months apart, and my husband has always been the academic, successful one, where everything comes easy. My BIL has always had a much harder time with everything--academics, sports, finding a spouse, etc. And my husband, despite being the younger brother, did everything first: he went to grad school first, got a career first, got married first, had kids first, etc.

-They are in the exact same unusual career, only my husband went to grad school for it first and graduated 5 years before his brother. Oddly, my BIL would probably be considered "more successful" now even though he went to a much worse grad school

-Every time my husband does something, my BIL copies it--vacations especially. Like the exact same vacation with the exact same activities.

[Anonymous]

Maybe your sister isn't very original and just does whatever is suggested to her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel silly typing this out and need an outsider perspective. I feel like my whole life I have been attempting to build an identity independent of my younger sister. The problem is, I feel threatened by her because even though she is similar to me in her interests and hobbies, she is the more attractive and successful one. It’s like whatever ideas I have, she executes them much better than I.

I was artistic as a child and was pretty good. She also picks up art as her hobby and excels at it. I wouldn’t say she’s bad at all but as good as me. I was bookish and majored in literature in school. She didn’t but English was her favorite subject and suddenly she has taken up reading asa big hobby and loves to brag about how many books she’s read. She also seems to dress similar to how I do with us both gravitating towards the same style of clothes and shoes.

It’s very annoying! I just want to be me and not have a prettier and mote successful version of a mini me in my sister!

You're nuts. You both like "art" and "reading." English was her favorite subject, and somehow she's copying you because she likes to read a lot. "Art" is a huge category and a common hobby. Your style is similar probably because you both shop at mainstream stores, and because you might well have similar body types/coloring/SES.

[Anonymous]

So you want her to....suck at everything so you can feel better about yourself?

I'd suggest you stop comparing. Look at yourself outside your family. Find a way to use the shared interests with your sister to bond, not compete.

It could just be you need some time away. But it sounds like your ego is the gutter. That's not your sister's job to fix, it's your job to fix. I'd suggest some good talk therapy to explore why you are so threatened by her.