Gushing about spouse on FB

[Anonymous]

I’m on FB and never mention DH, not even on anniversaries or sweet days.

[Anonymous]

I know one couple that has separate FB accounts, but she logs into his account on various milestone days and posts sappy messages to herself from "him". She doesn't realize that our whole friend group knows that it's actually her. And yes, he has cheated on her.

[Anonymous]

So does anybody HERE (10-20 years in at least) post about their spouse on FB? Why?

[Anonymous]

If they're very young marrieds, like 24 or under, I don't think it's so unusual to overshare or be gushy. Also, if they are very old. But age 25-60, I think constant gushing is tryhard.

[Anonymous]

No Facebook account here. Never joined. Best decision ever decades ago.

But, friends and relatives have showed me other’s account from time to time when things are ridiculous. Also, a woman that posts from her husband’s account. They gush about each other and we’ve seen some awful, awful fights and know it’s been a troubled marriage, including cheating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think people who do this are having major relationship problems, maybe headed towards divorce. Vowel renewals also tell me things are on the rocks.

I have noticed almost every single time someone starts doing this within a year or 2 I hear they are either separated or having marital troubles. In one case they were already divorced within a year.

[Anonymous]

I’ve been married 12.5 years, with my DH 22 years. I’d be really shocked if he’s cheated (obviously possible but seems very doubtful). We have young kids and plenty of stresses (eg he’s currently job hunting). He’s very anti social media and anti having his picture taken. Even so I write notes about him on our wedding anniversary, the anniversary of our first date and occasionally for other reasons. For instance, last year he watched the kids while I flew to my aunt’s funeral and I really appreciated that. At this point if I didn’t post about him occasionally I think my siblings in-law and his parents might wonder why - they’re the main audience who react to nice things I say about him. I agree the frequent posts are over the top. One of my friends now and then has “oh my! My husband is the most amazing man ever” and it’s a running joke because it’s always when she leaves her phone lying around and he posts it as a joke.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If it's a rare thing and a special moment (after some sort of hardship or a great achievement), I love it. Otherwise I think it sounds insecure and fake.

+1.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:it's worse when both the wife and the husband gush over each other on FB.

So tacky.

[Anonymous]

In 2010, fine to mildly annoying. In 2020, cringeworthy. Overuse of FB after all these years is just plain painful, especially when it’s super personal and is like a rehash every anniversary. Go tell your spouse you love them to their face.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been married 12.5 years, with my DH 22 years. I’d be really shocked if he’s cheated (obviously possible but seems very doubtful). We have young kids and plenty of stresses (eg he’s currently job hunting). He’s very anti social media and anti having his picture taken. Even so I write notes about him on our wedding anniversary, the anniversary of our first date and occasionally for other reasons. For instance, last year he watched the kids while I flew to my aunt’s funeral and I really appreciated that. At this point if I didn’t post about him occasionally I think my siblings in-law and his parents might wonder why - they’re the main audience who react to nice things I say about him. I agree the frequent posts are over the top. One of my friends now and then has “oh my! My husband is the most amazing man ever” and it’s a running joke because it’s always when she leaves her phone lying around and he posts it as a joke.

Your husband watched the kids while you went to a funeral? Wow, where can I get one of those?

[Anonymous]

One of my good friends gushes and so does her husband. They have lots of challenges in their lives (major medical issues with 2 SN kids), and the gushing seems like a way for them to remind themselves that at least they have each other. When they gush, friends and family then chime in with kind words. Not my cup of tea but they are such good people that nobody minds and we are all happy to think that maybe our replies brighten their days.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think people who do this are having major relationship problems, maybe headed towards divorce. Vowel renewals also tell me things are on the rocks.

I have noticed almost every single time someone starts doing this within a year or 2 I hear they are either separated or having marital troubles. In one case they were already divorced within a year.

Yup. This couple in our neighborhood used to fish over each other and even gave each other “report cards” on Mother’s and Father’s Day. Turns out he was cheating AND embezzling. She now living in a townhouse with the kids and he’s going to jail. Seriously.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think people who do this are having major relationship problems, maybe headed towards divorce. Vowel renewals also tell me things are on the rocks.

I have noticed almost every single time someone starts doing this within a year or 2 I hear they are either separated or having marital troubles. In one case they were already divorced within a year.

Same here. That is a red flag to me now. So are the couples that suddenly have so many separate interests and friends that they spend maybe 1 night a week together. They always say “it’s healthier for a couple to spend some time apart.” And I know they are doomed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been married 12.5 years, with my DH 22 years. I’d be really shocked if he’s cheated (obviously possible but seems very doubtful). We have young kids and plenty of stresses (eg he’s currently job hunting). He’s very anti social media and anti having his picture taken. Even so I write notes about him on our wedding anniversary, the anniversary of our first date and occasionally for other reasons. For instance, last year he watched the kids while I flew to my aunt’s funeral and I really appreciated that. At this point if I didn’t post about him occasionally I think my siblings in-law and his parents might wonder why - they’re the main audience who react to nice things I say about him. I agree the frequent posts are over the top. One of my friends now and then has “oh my! My husband is the most amazing man ever” and it’s a running joke because it’s always when she leaves her phone lying around and he posts it as a joke.

Your husband watched the kids while you went to a funeral? Wow, where can I get one of those?

+1 My thoughts exactly. What a hero.