I am done - literally don’t care anymore

[Anonymous]

I can’t believe the husband is getting a pass. That would not work in my marriage. Even without CV-19 the OP would be overwhelmed without help from her kids father.

[Anonymous]

So sorry OP. No judgment here. Do what you need to to get through the day.

And have a discussion with your DH. He needs to find a way to help, even if that means he wakes up super early to work or works long after the kids are in bed. Being a lawyer and having a big case load is no excuse. He needs to mange his time better so that he can help with the kids and give you a break.

-a lawyer with a huge case load with two small kids

[Anonymous]

Hugs op! Plus the rain!

[Anonymous]

OP sounds ill-equipped to be a mother.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So sorry OP. No judgment here. Do what you need to to get through the day.

And have a discussion with your DH. He needs to find a way to help, even if that means he wakes up super early to work or works long after the kids are in bed. Being a lawyer and having a big case load is no excuse. He needs to mange his time better so that he can help with the kids and give you a break.

-a lawyer with a huge case load with two small kids

Op here - I think the last two weeks were just especially difficult. He was already waking up early (4:30-5am) and going to bed late (10-11pm). He had an oral argument, a deposition, a webinar and his regular work all in the span of like 10 days. I am hoping it slows down sometime soon but it seems that he is taking on more and more but others in his group aren’t/can’t. Probably because I do everything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP sounds ill-equipped to be a mother.

Op here - thanks. Prior to this I would disagree but at this point I tend to agree with you. Not sure what to do with the kids though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP sounds ill-equipped to be a mother.

Does kicking someone who is down get you off? There are other websites on which you can get your jollies by being cruel, go find them.

[Anonymous]

HIRE HELP! College kid, nanny, anything

[Anonymous]

OP, have to tried to hire a live in nanny? The whole point of working biglaw is to make money for help like that. Hire someone who can help! Don’t try to do it all alone!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Grow up, OP. You chose to have 3 kids...would you have only had them if you knew you could ship them off to school every day?

Op here - I mean it is expected that the kids would go to school every day isn’t it? Do you have kids and homeschool them? Also we typically do things throughout the day not sit at home all day long.

You don’t have to sit at home all day long. Why does everybody think this? I would also be going insane if I forced my kids to stay inside all day. It is also very unhealthy for them and cruel.

Where are they going to go? No playgrounds. Kids aren’t old enough for bike riding. And it sounds like they have a yard that the kids do play in.
Normally, moms with infants get together with friends, vent about things, take turns holding and helping each other’s kids. None of that is going on.
Hugs, OP.

OP, where do you live? In DC, certain parks are open (Rock creek, Anacostia, Fort DuPont) and you can drive to them and take the kids for a walk. Maybe there is something similar in your area? It’s what we’ve been doing with our similarly aged kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, have to tried to hire a live in nanny? The whole point of working biglaw is to make money for help like that. Hire someone who can help! Don’t try to do it all alone!

Op here - our house isn’t big enough for a live in nanny. We have a 4 bedroom and the two older kids share a room so that we have a dedicated office. I work from home (normally) as well.

Also I was under the impression we weren’t suppose to have people other than our immediate family in our house. So we haven’t hired anybody.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, have to tried to hire a live in nanny? The whole point of working biglaw is to make money for help like that. Hire someone who can help! Don’t try to do it all alone!

+1.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So sorry OP. No judgment here. Do what you need to to get through the day.

And have a discussion with your DH. He needs to find a way to help, even if that means he wakes up super early to work or works long after the kids are in bed. Being a lawyer and having a big case load is no excuse. He needs to mange his time better so that he can help with the kids and give you a break.

-a lawyer with a huge case load with two small kids

Op here - I think the last two weeks were just especially difficult. He was already waking up early (4:30-5am) and going to bed late (10-11pm). He had an oral argument, a deposition, a webinar and his regular work all in the span of like 10 days. I am hoping it slows down sometime soon but it seems that he is taking on more and more but others in his group aren’t/can’t. Probably because I do everything.

Aren't courts all closed? I realize lawyers are still working, but are they really as busy?

OP today let them have free reign on screens and food and then have a goal to have a loose schedule tomorrow. Maybe an hour of legos or building things after breakfast, then a walk outside, then lunch, then an hour or two of screens, free play that doesnt include screens, showers or bath before dinner, dinner, movie night bed.
I know for me I feel like less of a crap parent if my kids have had outside time and some non screen playtime.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, have to tried to hire a live in nanny? The whole point of working biglaw is to make money for help like that. Hire someone who can help! Don’t try to do it all alone!

Op here - our house isn’t big enough for a live in nanny. We have a 4 bedroom and the two older kids share a room so that we have a dedicated office. I work from home (normally) as well.

Also I was under the impression we weren’t suppose to have people other than our immediate family in our house. So we haven’t hired anybody.

?? That is a wrong impression. My brother and his wife are both doctors and so of course they have a babysitter coming everyday because how else would they be able to work at the hospital? You do what you need to do. You need help. If you can’t have a live in nanny, then hire a nanny who lives out of the house. Make this easier for yourself.

[Anonymous]

It's ok OP. TV and Cheerios are fine right now. Most people's kids are not doing wholesome things all day, lesrning a ton, and avoiding screens, despite what you read here. You're not an unfit mother.

My 5 year old gets TV and tablet games whenever the baby naps so we can either rest or work, or when my husband and i both have meetings...that's like 3 hours a day right now. And he used to eat a more nutritious range of foods at day care because he saw his friends doing it, but refuses our versions of the same foods and basically only eats bread, dairy products, fruit, and junk food. And my husband works a lot less hours than yours.