Why Should We Get Upset if Our Child Curses?

[Anonymous]

Omg you want the neighborhood kids to call you by your title? Really insecure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What are your thoughts on children using curse words?

Is there an appropriate age when kids / teens can cuss?

Change your language as they must have picked it up from you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I tell them I should never hear them cursing (I wouldn’t be shocked if they have or will do it with their friends). I tell them that if friends’ parents hear it, they are less likely to be invited over.

This.

[Anonymous]

OP here - good responses, thank you.

In my industry, curse words are the norm but I turn it off before I come home. Sometimes I’ll slip around the children, but not very often.

I overheard my sophomore hs daughter say a curse word on the phone to her friends and I didn’t say anything, I figured me saying something isn’t going to make her stop - but afterwards I did ask her to not talk that way while she’s at home.

[Anonymous]

I think swearing is fine, but only in ways like that's f*ck*ng awesome, not you're a f*ck*ng idiot.

I don't let them because then it becomes habit, it will slip at school, and then they'll be in trouble.

Sometimes I'll let DS9 say whatever swears he wants but only for 5 minutes. Dd12 doesn't curse because she plans to be famous someday and wants to be able to say she's never spoken a curse word...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s me DH and 11 yo DD. we curse like sailors at home/in the car. She said, and I agree, are they building another F-ing Starbucks???

I promise if her teachers or coaches or friends parents heard her they’d fall over from shock

This is just sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a swear a lot because the words just took off the tongue so well.

I’ve talked to my kids about how grown-ups only like hearing other grown-ups using those words. And that they’ll get in trouble at school for using them, and they’ll deal with the consequences.

I think the reason it grates when they use them is because I don’t want them experiencing the emotions that prompt them in me. There’s a loss of innocence that I prefer to be shielded from until they are older.

Most adults do NOT like hearing other adults curse. So off-putting and disrespectful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t care about “curse words”. However true hateful words - words that demean a person’s religion, sexual preference or nationality, or (the worst) disability get severely punished. Ex: Use the word “retard” and you are grounded without screens for two weeks. Use the word f*ck and I turn a deaf ear.

Just pointing out that you are using ableist language here, despite your professed intolerance of words that could demean a person’s abilities.

OMG, you are a tiresome bore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s me DH and 11 yo DD. we curse like sailors at home/in the car. She said, and I agree, are they building another F-ing Starbucks???

I promise if her teachers or coaches or friends parents heard her they’d fall over from shock

This is just sad.

Actually it was pretty funny

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t care about “curse words”. However true hateful words - words that demean a person’s religion, sexual preference or nationality, or (the worst) disability get severely punished. Ex: Use the word “retard” and you are grounded without screens for two weeks. Use the word f*ck and I turn a deaf ear.

Just pointing out that you are using ableist language here, despite your professed intolerance of words that could demean a person’s abilities.

Are you suggesting providing examples of language not tolerated is as bad as using those words to demean others?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t care about “curse words”. However true hateful words - words that demean a person’s religion, sexual preference or nationality, or (the worst) disability get severely punished. Ex: Use the word “retard” and you are grounded without screens for two weeks. Use the word f*ck and I turn a deaf ear.

Just pointing out that you are using ableist language here, despite your professed intolerance of words that could demean a person’s abilities.

Are you suggesting providing examples of language not tolerated is as bad as using those words to demean others?

I think she's suggesting that "turn a deaf ear" is ableist language.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t care about “curse words”. However true hateful words - words that demean a person’s religion, sexual preference or nationality, or (the worst) disability get severely punished. Ex: Use the word “retard” and you are grounded without screens for two weeks. Use the word f*ck and I turn a deaf ear.

Just pointing out that you are using ableist language here, despite your professed intolerance of words that could demean a person’s abilities.

Are you suggesting providing examples of language not tolerated is as bad as using those words to demean others?

I think she's suggesting that "turn a deaf ear" is ableist language.

DP- I agree, not that "deaf ear" is such a bad thing to say, but rather funny that PP was so enlightened about avoiding words which stigmatize disability but then let this slip. Normally I am blind to such irony, but this was funny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t care about “curse words”. However true hateful words - words that demean a person’s religion, sexual preference or nationality, or (the worst) disability get severely punished. Ex: Use the word “retard” and you are grounded without screens for two weeks. Use the word f*ck and I turn a deaf ear.

Just pointing out that you are using ableist language here, despite your professed intolerance of words that could demean a person’s abilities.

Are you suggesting providing examples of language not tolerated is as bad as using those words to demean others?

I think she's suggesting that "turn a deaf ear" is ableist language.

DP- I agree, not that "deaf ear" is such a bad thing to say, but rather funny that PP was so enlightened about avoiding words which stigmatize disability but then let this slip. Normally I am blind to such irony, but this was funny.

Yes, it was insanely funny!

[Anonymous]

I pretend to get upset when my kids' curse.

I don't mind cursing. But I don't want my kids to get in trouble at school, or offend Grandma, or lose a job because cursing is automatic to them. So, I let them practice controlling their cursing by asking them to control it around me. So, I don't curse in front of them, and if they do it in front of me, I redirect.

But I am not actually offended. I don't care if they curse around their peers. I curse around my peers too. Just not in front of my kids.

Now, one of my kids is 20. He just told me that the shirt he was wearing was his "zero F---" shirt. I was a little offended because I gave him the shirt, but not by the language. I figure he's an adult whatever he wants is fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t care about “curse words”. However true hateful words - words that demean a person’s religion, sexual preference or nationality, or (the worst) disability get severely punished. Ex: Use the word “retard” and you are grounded without screens for two weeks. Use the word f*ck and I turn a deaf ear.

Just pointing out that you are using ableist language here, despite your professed intolerance of words that could demean a person’s abilities.

Are you suggesting providing examples of language not tolerated is as bad as using those words to demean others?

I think she's suggesting that "turn a deaf ear" is ableist language.

DP- I agree, not that "deaf ear" is such a bad thing to say, but rather funny that PP was so enlightened about avoiding words which stigmatize disability but then let this slip. Normally I am blind to such irony, but this was funny.

Yes, it was insanely funny!

I was struck dumb by how silly it was.