St. Anselm's Abbey School-Inappropriate relationship between teacher/coach and student

[Anonymous]

Ditto. Prospective applicant. Don't want to get off on the wrong foot with the admin by asking about what are for us only rumors, but also feel remiss in not investigating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The fact that a current parent has heard nothing is deeply troubling to me. It suggests a lack of honesty by a school I admire greatly.

Abbey parent here, and your premise is false. The headmaster sent two letters to parents about this. The first announced the teacher's resignation, thanking him for his service and wishing him well, and the second, addressing speculation over the first, said that personnel matters at the school are treated as confidential. As a PP has noted, and as anyone with knowledge of HR or employment law will tell you, that is the correct policy for the school to maintain. So most of us parents are content in knowing that the school is run competently and that, whatever problem may have existed with the teacher, the school resolved it promptly.

But you, 19:00, are welcome to pass on to us whatever information you have. You seem to know more than anyone else. (Are you also the OP? My guess is yes, you are. Only the forum's internal logs know for sure.) The school won't tell us more, so if it's important, please do a good deed and tell us. Otherwise, what I think is dishonest is your innuendo, your suggestions of a scandal, and your suggestion that the situation may recur. I don't know if you have an evil motive, or you're paranoid, or you're over-excited by some gossip you've heard. I think the chances are negligibly slim that there's really something about the teacher's resignation that I should know, and I'm sick of being called a dupe for being willing to move on. So please, 19:00, PUT UP OR SHUT UP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The fact that a current parent has heard nothing is deeply troubling to me. It suggests a lack of honesty by a school I admire greatly.

Abbey parent here, and your premise is false. The headmaster sent two letters to parents about this. The first announced the teacher's resignation, thanking him for his service and wishing him well, and the second, addressing speculation over the first, said that personnel matters at the school are treated as confidential. As a PP has noted, and as anyone with knowledge of HR or employment law will tell you, that is the correct policy for the school to maintain. So most of us parents are content in knowing that the school is run competently and that, whatever problem may have existed with the teacher, the school resolved it promptly.

But you, 19:00, are welcome to pass on to us whatever information you have. You seem to know more than anyone else. (Are you also the OP? My guess is yes, you are. Only the forum's internal logs know for sure.) The school won't tell us more, so if it's important, please do a good deed and tell us. Otherwise, what I think is dishonest is your innuendo, your suggestions of a scandal, and your suggestion that the situation may recur. I don't know if you have an evil motive, or you're paranoid, or you're over-excited by some gossip you've heard. I think the chances are negligibly slim that there's really something about the teacher's resignation that I should know, and I'm sick of being called a dupe for being willing to move on. So please, 19:00, PUT UP OR SHUT UP.

I've got to say, I'm a pretty tolerant, laissez-faire parent (especially by the standards of these boards), but if I got a letter from my kid's school saying that there was an incident, the teacher left, it's all under control, and we won't tell you what it was about, I'd be pumping everyone I know for more information!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The fact that a current parent has heard nothing is deeply troubling to me. It suggests a lack of honesty by a school I admire greatly.

Abbey parent here, and your premise is false. The headmaster sent two letters to parents about this. The first announced the teacher's resignation, thanking him for his service and wishing him well, and the second, addressing speculation over the first, said that personnel matters at the school are treated as confidential. As a PP has noted, and as anyone with knowledge of HR or employment law will tell you, that is the correct policy for the school to maintain. So most of us parents are content in knowing that the school is run competently and that, whatever problem may have existed with the teacher, the school resolved it promptly.

But you, 19:00, are welcome to pass on to us whatever information you have. You seem to know more than anyone else. (Are you also the OP? My guess is yes, you are. Only the forum's internal logs know for sure.) The school won't tell us more, so if it's important, please do a good deed and tell us. Otherwise, what I think is dishonest is your innuendo, your suggestions of a scandal, and your suggestion that the situation may recur. I don't know if you have an evil motive, or you're paranoid, or you're over-excited by some gossip you've heard. I think the chances are negligibly slim that there's really something about the teacher's resignation that I should know, and I'm sick of being called a dupe for being willing to move on. So please, 19:00, PUT UP OR SHUT UP.

You are a dupe. I can't believe your son got into St. Anselm's. There is nothing wrong with my premise. Be analytical. Do you really think that a teacher/coach employed by the school for 10 years left campus on a Friday and resigned remotely on a Tuesday with nothing seriously wrong having happened? That sort of thinking is a terrible 'head in the sand' mentality.
If you are really reassured by a couple of letters wishing him the former teacher well and citing school HR policy and employment law, then you should not be. Those sort of letters are simply legal/perception moves to quell potential litigation and to avoid having a frank discussion of an embarrassing situation. Do you really think that "the school resolved it promptly" by with two letters but without any sort open discussion amongst the students and parents?

What I have been saying is that something serious did occur, that I cannot reveal more without exposing who gave me this information (its a tiny school), and that parents and parents of potential applicants should do their own homework and ask direct questions about what happened and what was done in response. If those answers are enough for you, then so be it. But you should at least ask. For your boys's sake and the $20,000 in tuition, I think that is reasonable.

[Anonymous]

I'm a total outsider. It's pretty obvious what happened. What do people want from the school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a total outsider. It's pretty obvious what happened. What do people want from the school?

It's not at all obvious to me what happened, and 00:14 is deliberately distorting what he's heard. He uses phrases that are common euphemisms for sexual misconduct, but he won't come out and allege that because it isn't true and he's just smart enough to know his identity could be traced and he'd get walloped with a defamation suit. By staying vague, he can be completely irresponsible in smearing the school with innuendo.

But as you correctly ask, what more do people want from the school? There was a problem with a teacher, and the teacher promptly left.

As a satisfied Abbey parent, I'm not going to fear some unknown lingering threat just to gratify Gossip Boy's sense of self-importance.

[Anonymous]

I tried asking the school about this matter and got a very polite but legal non answer as to what happened.

[Anonymous]

You are a dupe. I can't believe your son got into St. Anselm's. There is nothing wrong with my premise. Be analytical. Do you really think that a teacher/coach employed by the school for 10 years left campus on a Friday and resigned remotely on a Tuesday with nothing seriously wrong having happened? That sort of thinking is a terrible 'head in the sand' mentality.
If you are really reassured by a couple of letters wishing him the former teacher well and citing school HR policy and employment law, then you should not be. Those sort of letters are simply legal/perception moves to quell potential litigation and to avoid having a frank discussion of an embarrassing situation. Do you really think that "the school resolved it promptly" by with two letters but without any sort open discussion amongst the students and parents?

What I have been saying is that something serious did occur, that I cannot reveal more without exposing who gave me this information (its a tiny school), and that parents and parents of potential applicants should do their own homework and ask direct questions about what happened and what was done in response. If those answers are enough for you, then so be it. But you should at least ask. For your boys's sake and the $20,000 in tuition, I think that is reasonable.

Why don't you sell your story to the National Inquirer. We're not interested in your specious claims. Take a hike.

[Anonymous]

I've got to say, I'm a pretty tolerant, laissez-faire parent (especially by the standards of these boards), but if I got a letter from my kid's school saying that there was an incident, the teacher left, it's all under control, and we won't tell you what it was about, I'd be pumping everyone I know for more information!

Pump away.

[Anonymous]

Why don't you sell your story to the National Inquirer. We're not interested in your specious claims. Take a hike.

Why so angry? If you think the story is specious then just show or quote the headmaster or the teacher saying so...or is that why you are defensive and upset!? Because they won't...

[Anonymous]

I have no skin in this game. No anger. The idiot bringing up specious claims has the burden of proof. I would not waste my time to disprove nonsense anytime an idiot asserts annonymous allegations.

Go for it Ms lips. What do you have? If nothing, why the aggressive assertions. Simply shut your trap or sell your story.

[Anonymous]

I don't pretend to know what happened but as a concerned parent who knew the teacher/coach and is close with some of the faculy, I asked about this matter recently and was told that the matter was confidential and that the teacher/coach was not allowed on campus or to interact with students.
Not National Enquirer material but it does bother me. Do I think St. Anselm's is a bad school in any way shape or form? No! But I do wish the school had been more forthcoming.

[Anonymous]

My son is hoping to be accepted there, and this thread keeps getting resurrected. Should this issue, or any other issue regarding St. Anselm's give us pause accepting an offer of admission? Thanks.

[Anonymous]

My son is hoping to be accepted there, and this thread keeps getting resurrected. Should this issue, or any other issue regarding St. Anselm's give us pause accepting an offer of admission? Thanks.

No. St. Anselm's remains an outstanding school despite this troubling incident. I say that as a happy Abbey parent. That said, I think Headmaster Silvano and Father Peter should and could do better with oversight of the Athletic department. It seemed to me that their convern is so academic centric that some of the boys who chose to play varsity athletics suffer from barely qualified coaches and an Athletic Director who should retire...but that is my only critisicism.

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Update. The teacher/coach at the center of this controversy is now working at the Kirov Academy for Ballet in DC and Trinity College as a science teacher. Both schools are in NE not far from St. Anselm's which is odd because some of us were told that without a recommendation, which St. Anselm's would not be giving, that this teacher would not be able to find a teaching position in the area.

Which mean one of two things: said teacher lied/omitted the circumstances regarding his "resignation" in November 2009...or St. Anselm's lied to the concerned parents and alums who believed the students who complained and gave his some sort of reference that would allow to continue teaching.

I have also been told he violated a private agreement not to contact his former student-athletes over the winter and that the school had to contact him and remind him of said agreement.

The school remains mum about the entire bizarre episode but it strikes me as very strange for a school that swears nothing wrong happened...
Why not be more forthcoming if this was some sort of academic or administrative disagreement. Why the secrecy?