If you had fewer kids than you wanted...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you got to be a parent, but ended up having fewer kids than you had hoped for whatever reason— financial constraints, infertility, other medical reasons, spouse didn’t want any more, etc.— how long did it take for you to stop thinking about it all the time/move on/focus on enjoying the kid(s) you have?

What helped?

Combo of secondary infertility, financial constraints, divorce, and a complex health issue.

When I was 5 years away from empty nest, it finally clicked that I was okay. I’m oversimplifying because we also were in the process of taking in a relative’s older child at the time. As a result, I was already admiring how smoothly life was running with just one highly independent minor left at home. Then, my husband’s cancer return so we had to step back from guardianship. Shortly afterwards, DD turned 13 and I just felt closure on the “missing kids”.

[Anonymous]

I couldn't have a third due to kidney stones, sounds weird I know but my doctor recommended against it so I got my tubes tied after the second.

I ended up having a foster son who lived with us off and on and is still a part of our lives as an adult. It filled the void.