We got in center school is home school- how do we tell our kid?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you are at the center school already, please don't tell your child anything. Taking him/her to the orientation basically just means them getting out of class and getting a tour of a school they already go to. Please don't turn your child into one those children who tell everyone they are in the smart class.

If you are not already at the center school, please just tell your child that you are going to check out a new school with additional opportunities. No need to mention AAP or the smart class.

Its insane to me that parents would tell their kids enough for them to go to school and tell other kids they got in the smart class. (This happens all the time by the way.)

Ok. Thanks. We are already at a center school so no need to bring my child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Its insane to me that parents would tell their kids enough for them to go to school and tell other kids they got in the smart class. (This happens all the time by the way.)

Many children have older siblings in AAP, so they already know about the program. I doubt there are any 2nd or 3rd graders at my center who don't know what AAP is and which classrooms are the AAP classrooms. It's unfortunate that it works like that, but kids are going to notice when there's such a stark divide between programs. Kids who attend the orientation will notice which other kids from their schools are or aren't there, and they will talk about it.

[Anonymous]

^ to add to this: Just because your kid hasn't mentioned anything about AAP to you does not mean that the kid is unaware of AAP. Most kids this age pick up a lot more than parents realize.

[Anonymous]

We've been through this once before with the older sibling. Our school has a LLIV but is not a center, so we had two orientations to attend. We basically explained it as checking out the 3rd-6th grade programs at a couple of different schools to see which one would be the best fit for his learning needs.

Second child of course knows a little more. We haven't broached the subject yet, but plan to say the same: we're evaluating the programs available from each of the schools. We'll make a decision later this spring about which one you'll attend next year.

Kids talk, many of them have older siblings, some of them hear about it from older neighbors / scouts / sports, some of them just pass along what they've heard 2nd or 3rd hand. I'd rather my kids hear my version of it and have an opportunity to ask me questions, than hear nothing from me and rely 100% on rumors from other 2nd graders.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Having been through this for 3 kids - do your kid a favor and say nothing. The 3d graders who announce to the teacher and the other kids that "they are in AAP/the smart class" are universally mocked by the staff and other parents and can be insufferable. Your child is very young, has very limited social filters, and does not understand what being in AAP means. In my personal experience, BTW, the kids who trumpeted their AAP acceptance at age 9 were not the strongest students in the program by 8th grade... It will come up eventually from some child, so wait until then to explain to your child that they have the same opportunity as all the other kids to do their best at school.

I think a kid is less likely to announce that he's in AAP/the smart class if you tell him in advance that he got in and it's not a big deal. The reason I say this is kids talk. My kid's base school is not a center, and when my oldest was found eligible he had never heard of AAP before. I told him because he doesn't like any type of change and I wanted him to go to the orientation to have some exposure to the school before he moved. I told him not to ask other kids if they were going also and that the center school was just a better fit for him right now. He came home from school the next day saying one of his friends was asking everyone at lunch if they were going to "the gifted school" next year. You never know what other parents tell their kids, so I think it's always good to proactively tell your kids. Another example was I was at the bus stop another year and two of the girls were hugging each other and screaming, and one was saying "I knew you'd get in because you are smart too." Other kids who hadn't been found eligible were there and heard all this. Anyway, ymmv.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Its insane to me that parents would tell their kids enough for them to go to school and tell other kids they got in the smart class. (This happens all the time by the way.)

Many children have older siblings in AAP, so they already know about the program. I doubt there are any 2nd or 3rd graders at my center who don't know what AAP is and which classrooms are the AAP classrooms. It's unfortunate that it works like that, but kids are going to notice when there's such a stark divide between programs. Kids who attend the orientation will notice which other kids from their schools are or aren't there, and they will talk about it.

I have an older child in the program (middle school now). When my younger child was accepted into it in 2nd grade, the kid still had no idea what it was.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Its insane to me that parents would tell their kids enough for them to go to school and tell other kids they got in the smart class. (This happens all the time by the way.)

Many children have older siblings in AAP, so they already know about the program. I doubt there are any 2nd or 3rd graders at my center who don't know what AAP is and which classrooms are the AAP classrooms. It's unfortunate that it works like that, but kids are going to notice when there's such a stark divide between programs. Kids who attend the orientation will notice which other kids from their schools are or aren't there, and they will talk about it.

I have an older child in the program (middle school now). When my younger child was accepted into it in 2nd grade, the kid still had no idea what it was.

Oh - and we are at a center.

[Anonymous]

It is true you can only control what you tell your own child - and how you react in front of your child to acceptance/denial/appeal - and that some kids will talk. I was the PP who had 3 kids go through this - two nonchalant and unconcerned and a youngest who knew all about it and determined to match up with his brothers. I just caution you that I have known many, many AAP teachers, staff and parents who eyeroll at the kids/parents trumpeting success/brains/giftedness - if you don't think your child is mature enough to communicate with their peers, be cautious with the words you use.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is true you can only control what you tell your own child - and how you react in front of your child to acceptance/denial/appeal - and that some kids will talk. I was the PP who had 3 kids go through this - two nonchalant and unconcerned and a youngest who knew all about it and determined to match up with his brothers. I just caution you that I have known many, many AAP teachers, staff and parents who eyeroll at the kids/parents trumpeting success/brains/giftedness - if you don't think your child is mature enough to communicate with their peers, be cautious with the words you use.

I agree with this, but that's why I told my kids so I could make sure they understood not to go around doing that. You don't want them picking up what to say from other kids whose parents tell them they got in because they are gifted and they are special. I too had three kids go through this and it was surprising by some of the conversations I heard or heard about.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Its insane to me that parents would tell their kids enough for them to go to school and tell other kids they got in the smart class. (This happens all the time by the way.)

Many children have older siblings in AAP, so they already know about the program. I doubt there are any 2nd or 3rd graders at my center who don't know what AAP is and which classrooms are the AAP classrooms. It's unfortunate that it works like that, but kids are going to notice when there's such a stark divide between programs. Kids who attend the orientation will notice which other kids from their schools are or aren't there, and they will talk about it.

I have an older child in the program (middle school now). When my younger child was accepted into it in 2nd grade, the kid still had no idea what it was.

Oh - and we are at a center.

I think they start talking after eligibility decisions are out. That's when my DC started hearing discussions at lunch, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is true you can only control what you tell your own child - and how you react in front of your child to acceptance/denial/appeal - and that some kids will talk. I was the PP who had 3 kids go through this - two nonchalant and unconcerned and a youngest who knew all about it and determined to match up with his brothers. I just caution you that I have known many, many AAP teachers, staff and parents who eyeroll at the kids/parents trumpeting success/brains/giftedness - if you don't think your child is mature enough to communicate with their peers, be cautious with the words you use.

I agree with this, but that's why I told my kids so I could make sure they understood not to go around doing that. You don't want them picking up what to say from other kids whose parents tell them they got in because they are gifted and they are special. I too had three kids go through this and it was surprising by some of the conversations I heard or heard about.

Yes to all of this. I dread hearing what all the chatter was in second grade when the kids get off the bus this afternoon. Some years it's totally insane what kids and parents say, and some years no one says anything at all. We'll see what this afternoon brings.

[Anonymous]

Nobody at our school talked about it last year. We only knew of one kid who was in before the orientation. And that kid’s mom asked me and then followed that with “I only asked because I knew your son would be in. I can’t ask anyone else.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Having been through this for 3 kids - do your kid a favor and say nothing. The 3d graders who announce to the teacher and the other kids that "they are in AAP/the smart class" are universally mocked by the staff and other parents and can be insufferable. Your child is very young, has very limited social filters, and does not understand what being in AAP means. In my personal experience, BTW, the kids who trumpeted their AAP acceptance at age 9 were not the strongest students in the program by 8th grade... It will come up eventually from some child, so wait until then to explain to your child that they have the same opportunity as all the other kids to do their best at school.

So you’re warning us that kids are surrounded by sh!tty adults would look down on/ universally mock an 8 year old? Jeez.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Having been through this for 3 kids - do your kid a favor and say nothing. The 3d graders who announce to the teacher and the other kids that "they are in AAP/the smart class" are universally mocked by the staff and other parents and can be insufferable. Your child is very young, has very limited social filters, and does not understand what being in AAP means. In my personal experience, BTW, the kids who trumpeted their AAP acceptance at age 9 were not the strongest students in the program by 8th grade... It will come up eventually from some child, so wait until then to explain to your child that they have the same opportunity as all the other kids to do their best at school.

So you’re warning us that kids are surrounded by sh!tty adults would look down on/ universally mock an 8 year old? Jeez.

My thoughts exactly. Kind of shitty. The kids should be excited and proud to be in AAP, not have to hide it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Having been through this for 3 kids - do your kid a favor and say nothing. The 3d graders who announce to the teacher and the other kids that "they are in AAP/the smart class" are universally mocked by the staff and other parents and can be insufferable. Your child is very young, has very limited social filters, and does not understand what being in AAP means. In my personal experience, BTW, the kids who trumpeted their AAP acceptance at age 9 were not the strongest students in the program by 8th grade... It will come up eventually from some child, so wait until then to explain to your child that they have the same opportunity as all the other kids to do their best at school.

So you’re warning us that kids are surrounded by sh!tty adults would look down on/ universally mock an 8 year old? Jeez.

My thoughts exactly. Kind of shitty. The kids should be excited and proud to be in AAP, not have to hide it.

Basically the NNAT and CogAT scores are based on genetics not hard work as the tests are given to first and second graders. Being proud of scoring well on those tests would be like being proud of being tall. I think it's ridiculous for adults to be mean to an 8 year old, but I also think it's crappy of parents whose kids get into AAP to make the kids feel like they are special because they were lucky enough to have innate aptitude for these tests. As kids get older and actually have to put work into grades, then we can start teaching them to be proud of their hard work.