I haven’t seen my parents in 6 months and they cancel their upcoming visit

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP their dog sounds like it's dying. That's very serious, a pet is part of the family.

They can come after this ordeal at a different time. Honestly, you're pretty insensitive.

No, their dog is not dying. Their dog is fine.

It’s my grandmas dog.

I wouldn’t cancel a weekend trip to see my parents if my MIL’s dog had to be put down. That’s ridiculous.

Maybe they are just closer to your grandmother than you are to your MIL (who, btw, must be the mother, not MIL, if one of your parents). Or have more empathy.

Hopefully there will be someone in your baby’s life who will teach him or her to be less selfish than you are when s/he grows up!

[Anonymous]

Probably for the best OP, do you really want to host when you are this pregnant?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m 8 months pregnant. I haven’t seen my parents since late summer. I will likely not be able to travel to see them soon, because they live 8+ hours away.

I couldn’t see them for Thanksgiving or Christmas because I had to work extra shifts due to a staffing shortage. Then they got the flu and then our house got the flu so a makeup visit couldn’t happen.

They were supposed to come this weekend and cancelled because ... my grandma might have to put her dog down. My Dad and I get along very well normally but I’m really not impressed that they cancel their visit over a dog. It seems like a really lame excuse and I now feel second best to a dog. They didn’t mention any plans for a makeup visit and I’m just feeling angry and over it.

My grandma is not senile and has local, adult children who are very involved in her life but they suddenly have to crowd around her over her dog. I’m very sympathetic to losing a pet, but my grandma is also ON THE WAY to my house and they could easily stop in to visit her on the way but no, apparently they have to devote the entire weekend. I’m just pissed.

I and my kids have not seen my dad in years. We took a trip halfway across the country specifically to see him, and he bailed at the last minute because his wife hates his original kids.

6 months doesn't sound too bad.

Unless they are dysfunctional like my dad and his wife, you won't be able to keep them away after your baby is born. Enjoy the freedom while you have it OP.

[Anonymous]

My DW cancelled our plans to go see my family for Thanksgiving several years ago because he cat was seriously ill. The cat ultimately had to be put to sleep a week or so later. Regardless, it still make me angry when I think about it. Basically, I understand how you feel. I would be offended, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m sorry. I’d be hurt by this.

+1 I would feel hurt by this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP their dog sounds like it's dying. That's very serious, a pet is part of the family.

They can come after this ordeal at a different time. Honestly, you're pretty insensitive.

No, their dog is not dying. Their dog is fine.

It’s my grandmas dog.

I wouldn’t cancel a weekend trip to see my parents if my MIL’s dog had to be put down. That’s ridiculous.

It sounds like they are taking care of the person who needs someone the most right now, your poor grandma who is about to lose her closest companion.

[Anonymous]

If I didn't visit my parents, I wouldn't get to see them for years. They just never wanted to drive here, possibly because of the traffic. Not even for things like graduations and my daughter's wedding. My mother did come for the births of my children, so maybe yours will come for that, since it's soon!

[Anonymous]

I don't think it's about the dog, OP. It's about Grandma. It's not a competition and you are not valued less. There are just exigent circumstances. I would assume your dad's siblings asked him to come because there is a little more going on...

[Anonymous]

You’re 8 months pregnant. They're probably delaying the visit until the baby arrives so they don't have to make 2 trips in a 4-6 week span.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Tell them that they’re making you feel less than the dog.

I would be annoyed and hurt, but it's not about the dog. They aren't visiting grandma to say goodbye to the dog, they are visiting to support grandma who is very sad. OP can feel bad about being less important that comforting grandma (again, I would be upset) but she hopefully realizes how bad that sounds when spoken to grandma's children.

Tell them you miss them and worry you won't see them for a long time.