Go ahead and vent about your in-laws here!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FIL put an entire head of butter lettuce, piece by piece, in our drain board. Like, draped it over the drain board. I quickly moved it to a colander, saying I wasn't sure when the last time we washed the drain board was.

He got offfeeeennnnndeeedddd.

A drain board like the rack you put over the sink to drain stuff on? Seems like an appropriate place for washed lettuce leaves to drain. And nice of him to try to help. What am I missing?

You're missing that a drain board is not throroughly washed every time it is used, the way a colander is. You're missing that there is no reason to use something the way it wasn't meant to be used when the right tool for the job is at hand.

Are you freaking out because of the romain lettuce thing? Because, otherwise, I think hanging leaves drain better than ones wadded up together in a colander. Unless you have a salad spinner.

Eeeeew. Sinks are dirtier than toilets. Unless you bleach your sink after every use, it’s like putting your food in the toilet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t have much to complain about, but my ILs don’t seem to like my cooking or the local cuisine. They’ve barely eaten anything and apparently my MIL cried because she didn’t like her meal. Tomorrow should be interesting because everything I’m cooking is inspired by indigenous peoples’ food, so it’s definitely not the standard turkey/mashed potatoes/stuffing.

I never say that, but team MIL if that's what you're cooking tomorrow. It's fine to have that IN ADDITION TO the traditional turkey dinner, but if there aren't some of the standards, you suck.

NP here. I totally disagree. You cook, you get to decide what to serve. The standards are boring anyway.

Don't host Thanksgiving if you don't want to host Thanksgiving. Especially if you know that people will be disappointed, as surely OP knows her MIL will be.

I really had no idea this would be an issue. I even asked ahead of time for requests and no one gave me any. And it’s not just thanksgiving dinner, everything else I’ve made has been an issue. The restaurants we go to have been an issue.

I don’t think they are intentionally trying to start drama, they’ve been very polite. I feel terrible because my MIL *cried* after dinner tonight. I feel terrible that they are hungry and don’t like my food or the restaurants we recommended. We just have very different tastes.

What kind of food did she get that made her cry? What about it is so terrible to her?

Op, disinvite your in laws and invite me.

Some people are willing to shake it up and not eat dry turkey and bland potatoes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FIL put an entire head of butter lettuce, piece by piece, in our drain board. Like, draped it over the drain board. I quickly moved it to a colander, saying I wasn't sure when the last time we washed the drain board was.

He got offfeeeennnnndeeedddd.

A drain board like the rack you put over the sink to drain stuff on? Seems like an appropriate place for washed lettuce leaves to drain. And nice of him to try to help. What am I missing?

You're missing that a drain board is not throroughly washed every time it is used, the way a colander is. You're missing that there is no reason to use something the way it wasn't meant to be used when the right tool for the job is at hand.

Are you freaking out because of the romain lettuce thing? Because, otherwise, I think hanging leaves drain better than ones wadded up together in a colander. Unless you have a salad spinner.

Eeeeew. Sinks are dirtier than toilets. Unless you bleach your sink after every use, it’s like putting your food in the toilet.

Oh, well, yes, we do squirt a bleach spray around the sink after washing the dishes after every meal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mother in law is wonderful. Heavy hand with the wine, and only 5 of us this year. No vent

Oh god, let the women drink. My aunt told me the the closer she gets to death the more wine she has wants to consume. I always buy her an extra bottle. Her husband died and she has no kids.

[Anonymous]

2 years ago, my SIL managed to horribly overcook a pre-cooked ham. It was like eating ham jerky.

Last year, she decides to put the ham in a huge slow cooker filled with 7up. Did you know ham could be soggy? I didn't until last year!

This year, we're not spending thanksgiving with her and I am SO HAPPY.

[Anonymous]

Pp, I’m so curious: what are these dishes inspired by indigenous people’s cuisines! Please share!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This year I have to spend both Thanksgiving and Christmas with my ILs. I need to grow a spine and tell my husband NO MORE.

I've had to spend both holidays with my ILs for the past several years. I told my DH recently just because my family lives far away doesn't mean I want to spend both holidays with his family every year. He said I don't get to prevent him from seeing his family. I said most couples split the holidays. He can decide what we do for one holiday and I should be able to decide what we do for the other. He said if I see my family another time of year, I don't also get to complain about not seeing them for the holidays. Yes I do. He doesn't get it. His parents are divorced so he's trying to hog the holidays with both his sets of parents and I get to spend the holidays with zero of my family and have zero choice of what I want to do? WTF? His parents chose to get divorced. They should be the ones giving up a holiday every year, not me! If I put my foot down, he'll want to take the kids. How do I ever get a holiday with my kids without the ILs?

[Anonymous]

Invited for heavy breakfast tomorrow. To start off the most calorific day of the year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t have much to complain about, but my ILs don’t seem to like my cooking or the local cuisine. They’ve barely eaten anything and apparently my MIL cried because she didn’t like her meal. Tomorrow should be interesting because everything I’m cooking is inspired by indigenous peoples’ food, so it’s definitely not the standard turkey/mashed potatoes/stuffing.

I never say that, but team MIL if that's what you're cooking tomorrow. It's fine to have that IN ADDITION TO the traditional turkey dinner, but if there aren't some of the standards, you suck.

NP here. I totally disagree. You cook, you get to decide what to serve. The standards are boring anyway.

Don't host Thanksgiving if you don't want to host Thanksgiving. Especially if you know that people will be disappointed, as surely OP knows her MIL will be.

I really had no idea this would be an issue. I even asked ahead of time for requests and no one gave me any. And it’s not just thanksgiving dinner, everything else I’ve made has been an issue. The restaurants we go to have been an issue.

I don’t think they are intentionally trying to start drama, they’ve been very polite. I feel terrible because my MIL *cried* after dinner tonight. I feel terrible that they are hungry and don’t like my food or the restaurants we recommended. We just have very different tastes.

PP if someone invites me to Thanksgiving I'm expecting, baseline, Turkey, cranberries in some form, mashed potatoes, stuffing and green bean casserole. Maybe one or two of those things are missing, maybe many more dishes are there, but im expecting at least 3 of 5. If you're inviting people to Thanksgiving and you ask for requests and dont get any, it's because people are assuming a percentage of the dishes they expect are a given.

I'm not against alternative thanksgivings outright but if you're having one it should have been communicated up front. No one should think they're going to a standard Thanksgiving and instead encounter tofu curry (or whatever). People look forward to it all year. It is mean to invite people to Thanksgiving, not tell them you're planning on no traditional Thanksgiving foods and be frustrated when they are disappointed.

[Anonymous]

We drove 6 hours to be here at my in-laws’. Was informed upon arriving that the cat has been peeing in the guest room. They tried to clean up, but there is no masking that smell. Its giving me a headache.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FIL put an entire head of butter lettuce, piece by piece, in our drain board. Like, draped it over the drain board. I quickly moved it to a colander, saying I wasn't sure when the last time we washed the drain board was.

He got offfeeeennnnndeeedddd.

A drain board like the rack you put over the sink to drain stuff on? Seems like an appropriate place for washed lettuce leaves to drain. And nice of him to try to help. What am I missing?

You're missing that a drain board is not throroughly washed every time it is used, the way a colander is. You're missing that there is no reason to use something the way it wasn't meant to be used when the right tool for the job is at hand.

Are you freaking out because of the romain lettuce thing? Because, otherwise, I think hanging leaves drain better than ones wadded up together in a colander. Unless you have a salad spinner.

Eeeeew. Sinks are dirtier than toilets. Unless you bleach your sink after every use, it’s like putting your food in the toilet.

Oh, well, yes, we do squirt a bleach spray around the sink after washing the dishes after every meal.

So yeah, if later, someone had to undo my "work" rinsing the lettuce because their sink is typically not bleached, I would be ticked too. Actually, I would be fine with it, because it was clearly not my problem, if it was their choice to keep a dirty sink, but if they showed attitude because THEY had a dirty sink, yeah, that's not cool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We drove 6 hours to be here at my in-laws’. Was informed upon arriving that the cat has been peeing in the guest room. They tried to clean up, but there is no masking that smell. Its giving me a headache.

Ewww. Sorry, PP, it's disgusting! Any chance you can spend the night at a hotel?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FIL put an entire head of butter lettuce, piece by piece, in our drain board. Like, draped it over the drain board. I quickly moved it to a colander, saying I wasn't sure when the last time we washed the drain board was.

He got offfeeeennnnndeeedddd.

A drain board like the rack you put over the sink to drain stuff on? Seems like an appropriate place for washed lettuce leaves to drain. And nice of him to try to help. What am I missing?

You're missing that a drain board is not throroughly washed every time it is used, the way a colander is. You're missing that there is no reason to use something the way it wasn't meant to be used when the right tool for the job is at hand.

Are you freaking out because of the romain lettuce thing? Because, otherwise, I think hanging leaves drain better than ones wadded up together in a colander. Unless you have a salad spinner.

Eeeeew. Sinks are dirtier than toilets. Unless you bleach your sink after every use, it’s like putting your food in the toilet.

Oh, well, yes, we do squirt a bleach spray around the sink after washing the dishes after every meal.

So yeah, if later, someone had to undo my "work" rinsing the lettuce because their sink is typically not bleached, I would be ticked too. Actually, I would be fine with it, because it was clearly not my problem, if it was their choice to keep a dirty sink, but if they showed attitude because THEY had a dirty sink, yeah, that's not cool.

I also would have thought they did not care much about cleanliness, if they did not keep their sink clean. So their reaction to the lettuce would seem like an incongruous overreaction to me. If they cared about cleanliness, why wasn't the sink clean to begin with?

[Anonymous]

We’re having Thanksgiving with another family member but for the days we are staying with MIL she made enough of one meal to last us the next couple days (lunch and dinner) so she won’t have to do any cooking. MIL knows it’s a meal that 3/4s of us don’t like.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This year I have to spend both Thanksgiving and Christmas with my ILs. I need to grow a spine and tell my husband NO MORE.

I've had to spend both holidays with my ILs for the past several years. I told my DH recently just because my family lives far away doesn't mean I want to spend both holidays with his family every year. He said I don't get to prevent him from seeing his family. I said most couples split the holidays. He can decide what we do for one holiday and I should be able to decide what we do for the other. He said if I see my family another time of year, I don't also get to complain about not seeing them for the holidays. Yes I do. He doesn't get it. His parents are divorced so he's trying to hog the holidays with both his sets of parents and I get to spend the holidays with zero of my family and have zero choice of what I want to do? WTF? His parents chose to get divorced. They should be the ones giving up a holiday every year, not me! If I put my foot down, he'll want to take the kids. How do I ever get a holiday with my kids without the ILs?

I see your point but you sound very whiny. Pick a holiday each year and fly to see your family. Boom.