The healthy obsessed moms

[Anonymous]

Planning a Halloween party for fifth graders? Unheard of at my kids school and mine is a parent participation program!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get the healthy moms. Because every various adult they interact with from oct 21-oct 31 feels like giving them a seer or candy.

For two of my boys, it really derails their overall nutrition to add too many sweets in. It’s not like they will eat healthy things PLUS the sweets. They will refuse healthy things on those kinds of days. Their moods are awful and completely different on the days that (I will admit that I am responsible) they have a cookie from the grocery store, the doctor gives them two lollipops, the neighbor says she has some Halloween chocolates for them, and preschool offered a cupcake because someone brought them in; and we were out of fruit so I gave them chips ahoy for a morning snack. Etc. I’ve had those days, and the moods and meltdowns are not pretty. Miserable for everyone.
My other child can handle it. She acts a tiny bit crazier but still eats a healthy dinner. My boys will forgo it because it’s not sweet too.

So, we need to all step back and limit at least 50% of the seeets we offer. We all think ‘a little is just ok,’but they’re getting it from so many sources.

I mean, everything in moderation, right? I can see how this happens occasionally, but they also need to learn to regulate and refuse by saying, "Oh, I already had a treat earlier today." That's not an easy lesson to learn, but it's an important one that they will need to carry into adulthood. Otherwise, just look at all the posts in the "Diet and Exercise" forums that are about not being able to pass up the birthday cakes and candy in their office.

Maybe we can shape that culture young, by not needing to have treats at every hourly (sorry, exaggeration) event of the day. Not hourly, but you can see what I mean when it’s offered at school, by the neighbor, at the grocery store, at the TOT event where they get loads of candy.

We can shape it by saying, you know what, oranges and popcorn can be party food too! And maybe one cookie at the end. Or not. Sugar isn’t required to celebrate.

Then these guys and girls will have an easier time saying they don’t need the office birthday cake.

Just a different approach I guess. You’re aging, have it around and practice saying no ocassionally. Im saying practice moments where we don’t offer cookies and cupcakes, and change the mentality and expectation.

We can agree to disagree. However, I also disagree....and strongly feel we should defer to the side of health....if you have to pick and choose.

[Anonymous]

Aging = saying.

[Anonymous]

There’s way too much junk in these kids lives. They won’t suffer if a Halloween party doesn’t have sugar.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Serious question OP, why is this so important to you? If you're so hell bent on giving your kid a load of junk, why can't you just wait until after school hours to do it?

Do you not have anything else to do with your time? Do you secretly want to sabotage everyone else's kid? Do you want to make sure that everyone else's kid is eating junk too so you don't need to feel bad about it? I'm honestly trying to understand your reasoning and none of the things I can think of make any sense to me.

Your kid is in 5th grade you said? You don't think they can survive without junk for a few hours while they're at school? You think they'll die without a halloween party with junk food because just dressing up isn't enough?

I'm saying this in the nicest possible way, but I really think it's time for you to step back a bit from your kid's life. They will survive a day without junk food. Really. And they'll also survive a halloween without you planning out their class snack. I promise.

You seem as obsessed as the mom at the meeting. Why can't there be a combination?

Class snacks were always planned in my kid's class. By 5th grade though we did nothing... simply to avoid discussions like this. It gets ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I mean, everything in moderation, right? I can see how this happens occasionally, but they also need to learn to regulate and refuse by saying, "Oh, I already had a treat earlier today." That's not an easy lesson to learn, but it's an important one that they will need to carry into adulthood. Otherwise, just look at all the posts in the "Diet and Exercise" forums that are about not being able to pass up the birthday cakes and candy in their office.

Maybe we can shape that culture young, by not needing to have treats at every hourly (sorry, exaggeration) event of the day. Not hourly, but you can see what I mean when it’s offered at school, by the neighbor, at the grocery store, at the TOT event where they get loads of candy.

We can shape it by saying, you know what, oranges and popcorn can be party food too! And maybe one cookie at the end. Or not. Sugar isn’t required to celebrate.

Then these guys and girls will have an easier time saying they don’t need the office birthday cake.

Just a different approach I guess. You’re aging, have it around and practice saying no ocassionally. Im saying practice moments where we don’t offer cookies and cupcakes, and change the mentality and expectation.

We can agree to disagree. However, I also disagree....and strongly feel we should defer to the side of health....if you have to pick and choose.

I mean, it's fine to want the world to be better than it is...but I guess I also pick my battles. I don't think that anything I do at my kids' school is going to change the practice of office birthday cakes, so I think it's better to teach my kid how to take responsibility for what they put in their bodies. But I do also think things have changed. There is a much wider variety of healthy options at school functions these days than when I was a kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid would've died of embarrassment if I was still meeting about class parties in 5th grade. Maybe it's time to take up a hobby or something.

OP here. I am a full time working mom. No one stepped up to room parent 5th grade so the teachers asked again. So not there are just a few of us are running the snacks and games for the entire 5th grade (4 classes of 25-27 kids each.) The teachers don't run the parties at all. If a few moms don't step up, your kids don't get a party. So sorry, this was my hobby after a long week of work.

I don't care about healthy snack options, but these kids have had a sweet option at every single party their entire elementary school and it is their last one. Not huge donuts or cupcakes, but simple items. Last year it was two Oreos, a cheese stick, and pretzels. So no one else is coming in with treats. Someone is buying bulk oranges and popcorn for the whole grade. Picking the games was an issue too. I just don't care, but I envision handing out these oranges and these 5th graders are going to be like "are you serious!??" If you want to start the health only kick, do it in K when they don't know any better.

Anyway, it is the dominating mom issue. Shutting other moms down like they are her children. I wasn't the one who suggested the cookie. I tried to say, that seems to be fine and the dominating mom ignored us and just moved on with her game ideas. Not sure if I can handle her all year as a room parent. Maybe that is why no one ever steps forward?

Domineering mom isn't going anywhere. She will still be like this in middle school.. she needs to run her kids' lives.

Send in what you want.

Likely a great time to end class parties, too. Maybe a movie that afternoon instead, and everyone brings their own snack for it.

That's what one of ds's teachers did.

[Anonymous]

Reading this thread as a non-American, I think it's no wonder why this country has an obesity crisis.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Reading this thread as a non-American, I think it's no wonder why this country has an obesity crisis.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Reading this thread as a non-American, I think it's no wonder why this country has an obesity crisis.

You nailed it!! Class parties.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We had a group of these moms at our school. We quietly went along with the planning since they were so vocal...but then we simply showed up at the class party with Halloween cupcakes and other normal Halloween junk food treats. Guess what the kids chose?

We were the older, more veteran moms BTW.

Yes, this the way to do it. The domineering mom wants to bring in oranges and another healthful item, let her. Someone else should bring in cupcakes or cookies or brownies without announcing it ahead of time. Done.

We don't eat many sweets at our house, and no one at work has a candy bowl or brings cake in. I think the idea of bringing junk food (or any food, really) as a snack after a kids' sports game is bizarre. But people need to have some perspective. Halloween is all about letting loose and having treats. It shouldn't be a battleground.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’d be grateful to her. All this junk is poisonous for goodness sake.

And you think microwave popcorn the other mom suggested is good for kids? That is the real offender. I think you sound pretty ignorant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We had a group of these moms at our school. We quietly went along with the planning since they were so vocal...but then we simply showed up at the class party with Halloween cupcakes and other normal Halloween junk food treats. Guess what the kids chose?

We were the older, more veteran moms BTW.

Yes, this the way to do it. The domineering mom wants to bring in oranges and another healthful item, let her. Someone else should bring in cupcakes or cookies or brownies without announcing it ahead of time. Done.

We don't eat many sweets at our house, and no one at work has a candy bowl or brings cake in. I think the idea of bringing junk food (or any food, really) as a snack after a kids' sports game is bizarre. But people need to have some perspective. Halloween is all about letting loose and having treats. It shouldn't be a battleground.

+1. The focus on healthy food should be the norm - day-to-day, school lunches, snacks at home etc. - with the Halloween party the exception where treats are allowed. But something tells me the domineering mom wants all treats banned at any event her precious children are a part of.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We had a group of these moms at our school. We quietly went along with the planning since they were so vocal...but then we simply showed up at the class party with Halloween cupcakes and other normal Halloween junk food treats. Guess what the kids chose?

We were the older, more veteran moms BTW.

Yes, this the way to do it. The domineering mom wants to bring in oranges and another healthful item, let her. Someone else should bring in cupcakes or cookies or brownies without announcing it ahead of time. Done.

We don't eat many sweets at our house, and no one at work has a candy bowl or brings cake in. I think the idea of bringing junk food (or any food, really) as a snack after a kids' sports game is bizarre. But people need to have some perspective. Halloween is all about letting loose and having treats. It shouldn't be a battleground.

+1. The focus on healthy food should be the norm - day-to-day, school lunches, snacks at home etc. - with the Halloween party the exception where treats are allowed. But something tells me the domineering mom wants all treats banned at any event her precious children are a part of.

I'm the non-American PP. It's actually one of my worries that my kids will end up becoming obese because of how normal junk food is in the US. Even in my office, people bring in doughnuts to share in the morning and it's not once in a while. Not to mention that I'm one of the few normal-weight folks in my department. I feed my kids healthy food but I have no control when they go over to a neighbor's house or at their school unless I'm also there, but I'm not a helicopter mom so I just let them be. So I get the healthy food mom in the OP's description. Instead of vilifying her, maybe see her point of view? Maybe expand the list of healthy items like homemade banana-zucchini muffins etc?

[Anonymous]

We are talking 10/11 year olds, not preschoolers. They are big enough to choose between oranges and kit kats.