Been friends with Mom for five years and she has never invited us over

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She just had a baby and I want to meet the baby and bring her a gift. I kind of hinted I wanted to meet the baby and nothing.

DH thinks the friendship is done. Friend never invites us to anything either. I’m pretty social and invite her always. She always comes to our birthday parties. She has never invited us once to theirs even though she has them.

Is it odd that she never invited us over?

I used to live in a 800sf apt. I still had people over. We have been to people’s homes with pet dander, clutter, small, big, clean, dirty, we don’t care.

Our other mutual friends have started dropping the friend from invitations due to lack of reciprocity.

I think there could be lots of reasons. Maybe she is embarrassed by her house ( you said you aren't but she is a different person) Maybe she is a hoarder or very messy? Do you like her company? Than don't be so rigid and meet her where she is comfortable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This post is from 2018

Right? How do people even find sh*t like this?

[Anonymous]

The birthday party invite seems to be a red flag (that she has them but does not include you). Other than those types of events, I generally avoid having people over. DH has ASD (would be described as high-functioning by people, if that were not a troubled term) and feels drained, plus he generally does not interact all that well.

[Anonymous]

I don't often host at home because my home isn't done yet and big dogs but I'll suggest meeting other places. Don't jump to conclusions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Her house is probably a perpetual wreck. The simplest, most obvious answer is usually the correct one. I wouldn't read any more into it.

+1. This seems really petty, especially during covid. I don't like people over unless I have the chance to clean, cook, etc. whatever it takes to look presentable.

The other reason people don't have others over? Someone is mentally ill or abusive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't often host at home because my home isn't done yet and big dogs but I'll suggest meeting other places. Don't jump to conclusions.

The liability of dogs and kids is also a great reason.

[Anonymous]

First of all, it is covid.

Second, if she is anything like me (I have an 8mo old, 3 year old, DH working from home) my home is barely functioning on weekdays and I spend the weekend catching up on housework and doing bulk cooking for the week and if I'm lucky I will get a few hours me me time.