Do you make lunch for guys who are just your friends? E

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, I work in a situation where finding time to run to the kitchen to microwave something is challenging. If I manage to find time and I can tell my coworker won’t then I’ll offer, and vice versa.

What situation is that? Saving lives, trading floor, call center?

I guess to OP, the question is do folks they work with do the same for same gender folks? So if fiancé isn’t making lunch for his male buddies at work and if his coworker isn’t making lunch for her female co-workers you have your answer. Personally, I would think it was strange if they weren’t dating or married but I will give the benefit of the doubt if this was really a thing at the office that other people do too for people they aren’t sleeping with.

Special ed teacher. It's not uncommon to be proctoring extended time tests, helping a kid through a crisis etc . . . throughout the lunch break.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You mean at the office..like get his lunch from the fridge and warm it up for him when you do yours..no I don't think so.

Exactly this scenario.

I'd do it if there was a very good reason like he's in a full body cast or close to it. Just to be nice, no way.

[Anonymous]

I don't do it for by DH, why for office buddy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, I work in a situation where finding time to run to the kitchen to microwave something is challenging. If I manage to find time and I can tell my coworker won’t then I’ll offer, and vice versa.

Hmm my job involves saving actual lives and still the only lunchtime warm ups involve couples. The only exception is if someone buys lunch / dinner for everyone .

I'm glad to know that you're more important that I am. I'm also glad to know that your job schedules things in a way that means you can make it to the microwave. I'm not sure what either of those things has to do with the fact that other people don't have the same level of flexibility in their jobs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, I work in a situation where finding time to run to the kitchen to microwave something is challenging. If I manage to find time and I can tell my coworker won’t then I’ll offer, and vice versa.

What situation is that? Saving lives, trading floor, call center?

I guess to OP, the question is do folks they work with do the same for same gender folks? So if fiancé isn’t making lunch for his male buddies at work and if his coworker isn’t making lunch for her female co-workers you have your answer. Personally, I would think it was strange if they weren’t dating or married but I will give the benefit of the doubt if this was really a thing at the office that other people do too for people they aren’t sleeping with.

Special ed teacher. It's not uncommon to be proctoring extended time tests, helping a kid through a crisis etc . . . throughout the lunch break.

But I assume this is something you do for all your coworkers. I also assume this is something everyone in the office does for each other .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, I work in a situation where finding time to run to the kitchen to microwave something is challenging. If I manage to find time and I can tell my coworker won’t then I’ll offer, and vice versa.

Hmm my job involves saving actual lives and still the only lunchtime warm ups involve couples. The only exception is if someone buys lunch / dinner for everyone .

I'm glad to know that you're more important that I am. I'm also glad to know that your job schedules things in a way that means you can make it to the microwave. I'm not sure what either of those things has to do with the fact that other people don't have the same level of flexibility in their jobs.

Someone is a little defensive. I’m assuming pp is a nurse or something similar. They don’t have time for lunch ever. I assume the point is if someone with that kind of job can find a way to feed themselves so can other people. Namely an engaged man. If you are feeding the taken men in your office stop. You are not their mother and the only reason for you to do it is because you want their attention namely sexual attention.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, I work in a situation where finding time to run to the kitchen to microwave something is challenging. If I manage to find time and I can tell my coworker won’t then I’ll offer, and vice versa.

Hmm my job involves saving actual lives and still the only lunchtime warm ups involve couples. The only exception is if someone buys lunch / dinner for everyone .

I'm glad to know that you're more important that I am. I'm also glad to know that your job schedules things in a way that means you can make it to the microwave. I'm not sure what either of those things has to do with the fact that other people don't have the same level of flexibility in their jobs.

Someone is a little defensive. I’m assuming pp is a nurse or something similar. They don’t have time for lunch ever. I assume the point is if someone with that kind of job can find a way to feed themselves so can other people. Namely an engaged man. If you are feeding the taken men in your office stop. You are not their mother and the only reason for you to do it is because you want their attention namely sexual attention.

Heating up a friend's lunch is not "feeding them". It's doing them a favor.

[Anonymous]

Warming up it coming his lunch? Absolutely not. But I'm a female manager in a male-dominated office (something like 80% male), so I make a point to about the gender-traditional roles like cooking or cleaning up after others.

But if a bunch of us are working on a time-intensive project, and one or two of us run out to grab takeout, a quick "hey, can we grab something for the rest of you while we're out?" would be fine even for me. Or ordering pizza for a large group lunch. But I would never single one guy out, or put myself in the role of food-provider with any consistency.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, I work in a situation where finding time to run to the kitchen to microwave something is challenging. If I manage to find time and I can tell my coworker won’t then I’ll offer, and vice versa.

What situation is that? Saving lives, trading floor, call center?

I guess to OP, the question is do folks they work with do the same for same gender folks? So if fiancé isn’t making lunch for his male buddies at work and if his coworker isn’t making lunch for her female co-workers you have your answer. Personally, I would think it was strange if they weren’t dating or married but I will give the benefit of the doubt if this was really a thing at the office that other people do too for people they aren’t sleeping with.

Special ed teacher. It's not uncommon to be proctoring extended time tests, helping a kid through a crisis etc . . . throughout the lunch break.

But I assume this is something you do for all your coworkers. I also assume this is something everyone in the office does for each other .

I do it for the people I share space with. I'm not walking all over the school looking for people to ask them if I can heat up their lunch, but if I'm leaving my classroom, and I see that my para or co-teacher is stuck and isn't likely to get away before the bell rings, I ask "do you want me to grab your lunch out of the fridge?", and conversely they do it for me. During years when I have a male para or co-teacher that means I'm asking a man. It's not some sexual thing, it's about being efficient.

[Anonymous]

Yea, that's weird. Have you met this woman? I'm assuming she's not some grandmotherly type?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, I work in a situation where finding time to run to the kitchen to microwave something is challenging. If I manage to find time and I can tell my coworker won’t then I’ll offer, and vice versa.

Hmm my job involves saving actual lives and still the only lunchtime warm ups involve couples. The only exception is if someone buys lunch / dinner for everyone .

I'm glad to know that you're more important that I am. I'm also glad to know that your job schedules things in a way that means you can make it to the microwave. I'm not sure what either of those things has to do with the fact that other people don't have the same level of flexibility in their jobs.

Someone is a little defensive. I’m assuming pp is a nurse or something similar. They don’t have time for lunch ever. I assume the point is if someone with that kind of job can find a way to feed themselves so can other people. Namely an engaged man. If you are feeding the taken men in your office stop. You are not their mother and the only reason for you to do it is because you want their attention namely sexual attention.

Heating up a friend's lunch is not "feeding them". It's doing them a favor.

Doing it for one person is not just helping a friend. Especially when that friend is involved with someone else. You are lying to yourself you have romantic feelings for this “friend”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve brought lunch to colleagues before. In my old office, there was a group of us who regularly picked up lunch for each other if we were on deadlines and couldn’t go out.

I think if you notice that two people spend a ton of time together at work and put energy into doing things that seem intimate, such as microwaving one another’s food, it’s likely that they are intimate in other ways.

That said, this is the first time I e heard of a microwave as a smoking gun for an affair. Usually they just go out to lunch together alone an inappropriate amount

Op here maybe I’m overreacting but I have had a weird feeling about him and her for the last 3 months basically since he started working at that office. I’m in a demanding program and we don’t have a lot of time together. I’ve been making him lunch. Last week he told me not to bother, but come to find out she got lunch for him. Today she warmed up the lunch I made for him. Maybe I’m crazy.

Hmmm. I think that something is up. She obviously told him that she was bringing him lunch; he knew because he told you not to make him lunch for that day. . Getting his lunch and heating it up is SO over the top; she is wowrking to get close to him. The good news is that he's sharing this information with you. Why? He's either oblivious or he's trying to make you jealous and wants you to slow down and pay more attention to him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, I work in a situation where finding time to run to the kitchen to microwave something is challenging. If I manage to find time and I can tell my coworker won’t then I’ll offer, and vice versa.

What situation is that? Saving lives, trading floor, call center?

I guess to OP, the question is do folks they work with do the same for same gender folks? So if fiancé isn’t making lunch for his male buddies at work and if his coworker isn’t making lunch for her female co-workers you have your answer. Personally, I would think it was strange if they weren’t dating or married but I will give the benefit of the doubt if this was really a thing at the office that other people do too for people they aren’t sleeping with.

Special ed teacher. It's not uncommon to be proctoring extended time tests, helping a kid through a crisis etc . . . throughout the lunch break.

But I assume this is something you do for all your coworkers. I also assume this is something everyone in the office does for each other .

I do it for the people I share space with. I'm not walking all over the school looking for people to ask them if I can heat up their lunch, but if I'm leaving my classroom, and I see that my para or co-teacher is stuck and isn't likely to get away before the bell rings, I ask "do you want me to grab your lunch out of the fridge?", and conversely they do it for me. During years when I have a male para or co-teacher that means I'm asking a man. It's not some sexual thing, it's about being efficient.

Well you do it for everyone and doesn’t apply to OPs scenario. Your input isn’t valuable here.

[Anonymous]

Meh, my office is a group of about 20 and we’re all generally close but there are a lot of friendships between males and females that are closer than others but that have honestly no funny business going on at all. I can see myself doing this for my closest guy friend at work and I can see other friend pairs doing this for each other. I’m happily married, zero desire to cheat, just a nice person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Meh, my office is a group of about 20 and we’re all generally close but there are a lot of friendships between males and females that are closer than others but that have honestly no funny business going on at all. I can see myself doing this for my closest guy friend at work and I can see other friend pairs doing this for each other. I’m happily married, zero desire to cheat, just a nice person.

A doormat. Seriously ladies stop behaving like this in the workplace.