People in couples: would you hang out with a single person?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've been divorced for about 3 years and have remained close with all of my friends. But I have noticed that I don't have the opportunity to host/attend couple-type dinner or cocktail parties like I did pre-divorce. I find that I have to make more of an effort to get together for night time events, and when I do it ends up being a "girls night" kind of thing, rather than a couples thing. So yes, I have noticed a difference.

I’ll give an honest answer on an anonymous message board. If any of my DH really close friends divorced (talking we were in the wedding party and are still close 15 years later or been friends since our kids were babies), I would still have them over to hang out and vice versa. We don’t have couples dinners now and typically my DH hates attending those types of things so most of our socializing is usually one on one or girl’s night for me, or DH going to dinner with his guy friends. Divorce wouldn’t change that dynamic. Now if I just met you, no I wouldn’t invite you over to hang out with just me and my DH and as mentioned it’s very rare for us to host anything with groups of people. If you had full custody of the kids I could see that being challenging because then that means you might not have time to meet up without kids and my kids are beyond the age of play dates.

[Anonymous]

Every time we advertise for a threesome.

[Anonymous]

Yes. Great way to test the compatibility waters for a future threesome.

[Anonymous]

Of course.

[Anonymous]

One of the most touching things to me is that shortly after I got divorced, a bunch of other couples I know were planning a ski trip and had an extra room and they invited me. I was the only single person, and I really appreciated that they still included me. We had a blast. So marrieds, something to think about.

[Anonymous]

OP, do you live in a conservative area? I could see this dynamic ONLY with cliquish women. I honestly would not care, but a lot of women are judgy and would not hang out with a single mom. You also mentioned that you just moved, I would recommend start going to church or maybe taking a class of some sort where moms and kids are hanging out. I would not care, as long as you’re an interesting and decent human being. I was raised by a single mother and a lot of parents would not let their kids hang out with me because my mom was a single mother. I started to hang out with blended family kids or single parents kids.

[Anonymous]

I've been divorced about a year and a half and most of my friends are couples. My mom friends are all from DD's daycare and a couple from work. We usually go out in a mom group every couple months, or a big outing with all the parents and kids. (I have a good relationship with ex-DH though, so we tend to go to the family events together with no issues.) My other non-parent friends are all paired up and I hang out with them one-on-one or a mix of couples and me in group events. NBD

[Anonymous]

Have you considered joining a local mom’s group? I’ve heard those can be fun for mom’s with younger children. After my divorce, I attended DivorceCare. I met women who were going through the same emotions I was there and I made lifelong friends of my own. I no longer felt so alone. It also gave me the tools I needed to start healing. I wonder if it might help you too. <3 It’s offered nationwide so there’s a good chance there’s one in your area. I have married and single friends but unfortunately a divorce sometimes changes the dynamics of those friendships. I will be praying for you, for tried and true friends who build you up. I’m glad you reached out!