What's up with my sexually dysfunctional marriage? (sorry, kinda long)

[Anonymous]

I prefer tto sleep in a differe t room. DH always wants to go to bed earlier and I need to read myself to sleep. He can't sleep with the light on. We always sleep better in separate bedrooms.

[Anonymous]

The addiction theory also came to my mind, and addiction to sleeping pills also might feed in here. You said DH has anxiety. My husband has a lot of anxiety about sleeping, and has had to struggle not to become addicted to sleeping pills. And if he is worried I will disrupt him as he is trying to fall asleep, he will move to another room.

This may be going far afield, but his anxiety plus the porn - easy, very stimulating, and virtually no work for him - may lead him to avoid you lest he is disappointed himself (sexually) or feels he may disappoin you. So sounds as though there may be a number of issues.

[Anonymous]

Don't underestimate his feelings of inadequacy in the bedroom. Focusing on the porn takes the pressure, off, etc. You said you had both gained weight, etc. That may have something to do with it. Not judging, just pointing out something that doesn't seem to have been raised here.