Grandparents - how long is enough?

[Anonymous]

My parents left us with my grandparents regularly for 5+ days at a time. I hated it. GPs would fight all the time and it was stressful for me as the oldest to have "care" for my siblings.

[Anonymous]

We enjoyed the Canadian TV at my grandparents' apt, especially the French weather channel and auction channel, because we learned our numbers well in French class. Only problem was the return trip to the US. My parents wouldn't give us our passports or birth certificates, only our library cards for ID, which caused problems with customs. Also, grandma gave us bologna sandwiches every year, and they were always taken away.

[Anonymous]

I would not watch two toddler grandkids at my or their house for more that three days. That is a ton of work and responsibility. That is very generous of you and I sincerely hope they are extremely grateful.

[Anonymous]

Maybe once the kids are older and even then it's a pain to deal w the sibling fighting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not watch two toddler grandkids at my or their house for more that three days. That is a ton of work and responsibility. That is very generous of you and I sincerely hope they are extremely grateful.

OP here - they are extremely grateful but I don't think they could ever appreciate what a shock it is to a 65 year old system after years of empty nester peace and solitude. My DH is going to visit them this afternoon because he misses all the hugs he was getting which means he has fully recovered from his exhaustion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

OP here - very simple I adore my children and my grandchildren. We downsized to a condo 5 years ago and then re-upsized last year when my kids started pumping out baby after baby and we needed more space for family gatherings. The 10 day request was the first more than one night request and I knew my daughter did not have an alternative as she was new to the area. She was going overseas to be a MOH at a wedding, so it wasn't just a vacation. To say no would have been shameful. But, we learned our lesson and now all of our children know that there will be a two night limit likely only once a year.

Good for you for letting everyone know your limit. It doesn't matter what other people do. Only you know your limit and you've been very generous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not watch two toddler grandkids at my or their house for more that three days. That is a ton of work and responsibility. That is very generous of you and I sincerely hope they are extremely grateful.

OP here - they are extremely grateful but I don't think they could ever appreciate what a shock it is to a 65 year old system after years of empty nester peace and solitude. My DH is going to visit them this afternoon because he misses all the hugs he was getting which means he has fully recovered from his exhaustion.

I think they could. Have they ever had a 3 day vacation or one week vacation WITH THEIR KIDS. I am talking 24/7 caring and interacting with their kids. No breaks at the office, No nanny, No babysitter, No day care half or full day. I'm talking 24/7 FAMILY TIME with TODDLERS for a week.

It's exhausting. Doesn't even feel like a vacation. Ask them to envision that week.


Anyhow, next time you watch any grandkids, may sure they have 3-6 hours of drop-off time at a pre-school or day care. Then you will survive much better!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not watch two toddler grandkids at my or their house for more that three days. That is a ton of work and responsibility. That is very generous of you and I sincerely hope they are extremely grateful.

OP here - they are extremely grateful but I don't think they could ever appreciate what a shock it is to a 65 year old system after years of empty nester peace and solitude. My DH is going to visit them this afternoon because he misses all the hugs he was getting which means he has fully recovered from his exhaustion.

That is so sweet!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not watch two toddler grandkids at my or their house for more that three days. That is a ton of work and responsibility. That is very generous of you and I sincerely hope they are extremely grateful.

OP here - they are extremely grateful but I don't think they could ever appreciate what a shock it is to a 65 year old system after years of empty nester peace and solitude. My DH is going to visit them this afternoon because he misses all the hugs he was getting which means he has fully recovered from his exhaustion.

That is so sweet!!!

OP here - my DH did visit them for about 30 minutes and he came home with a huge smile on his face. And they asked about me!!

[Anonymous]

The absolute most i would ever ask for (and only in extreme situations) would be a weekend. We actually left our kids (7 and 4) with my mom a few weekends ago because of an adult-only wedding where both my husband and I had roles. I felt horribly guilty, and would never do it again if I can avoid it. Our most common grandparent request is this: about once per month, we'll drop the kids off at grandma's at their bedtime, and DH and I will have a late date night while kids sleep at grandma's house, and we pick them up in the morning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not watch two toddler grandkids at my or their house for more that three days. That is a ton of work and responsibility. That is very generous of you and I sincerely hope they are extremely grateful.

OP here - they are extremely grateful but I don't think they could ever appreciate what a shock it is to a 65 year old system after years of empty nester peace and solitude. My DH is going to visit them this afternoon because he misses all the hugs he was getting which means he has fully recovered from his exhaustion.

That is so sweet!!!

OP here - my DH did visit them for about 30 minutes and he came home with a huge smile on his face. And they asked about me!!

Love it! You have made lasting memories.

[Anonymous]

10 days is too long with no help. I haven't even spent 10 straight no-help days with my own kids (4 and 1). Flame away but if I had a stretch like that I'd be hiring sitters and mothers helpers for breaks. Little kids are no joke. When my parents and in laws have our kids, I make sure to hire them some help too, even during 2-3 day stretches.