Why Do/Did Your 11-yo Boy Overeat?

[Anonymous]

Hi OP, I was the PP who asked how active he is. I didn't mean to push any buttons just wondered if he was very active because that leads to overeating in my boys then when they are out of season they just keep eating like they are practicing everyday.

It actually doesn't seem like his is overeating from what you listed. Do you give him seconds on items? If so maybe try what the others have said to limit carb and focus on seconds being proteins or veggis (hahaha -- that was a complete joke!)

I would try to get him more active though. He may just have a slower metabolism and can't eat as much as other kids because he will just gain faster. 11 is pretty early to see that sort of situation but you never know. Healthy eating habits are hard with kids that age. It sounds like you are doing everything right so I would make some minor tweaks but carry on!

[Anonymous]

I would definitely try to cut down on eating out. Of course he wants to stuff his face as restaurants - the food there is loaded with fat and salt!

[Anonymous]

is it a bad idea to award exercise with toys? there's a $$ lego set he really wants toi buy with his own money, but i'm thinking maybe paying for it if he promises to run/walk an hour a day for a month?

(don't want to assoicate that with his eating i know that's wrong)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
OP,

You haven't really told us any relevant facts:
1. BMI? Percentile in height and weight for his age?
2. Does he seem to only think about food?
3. Does he gulp his food or eat very quickly?
4. Does he eat more when stressed, anxious, before a big event?
5. Does he seem to have or has he expressed a loss of control when he starts to eat?

Right now we have no idea whether what you're describing is normal or not.

he thinks about food alot, and yes he eats very quickly and barely chews, especially veggies he just swallows them as if they're poison.

he definitely has no control in front of food, e.g. he'd get really upset if little sister even hinted to want something on his plate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:is it a bad idea to award exercise with toys? there's a $$ lego set he really wants toi buy with his own money, but i'm thinking maybe paying for it if he promises to run/walk an hour a day for a month?

(don't want to assoicate that with his eating i know that's wrong)

Run/walk is really dull for a kid-aren't there any fun sports or activities he likes?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's not a lot but he'd eat more if we let him. We already limit carbs to one serving but let him have his meats. And he'd ask what breakfasts gonna be before bed.

I'm really trying to find out why he's obsessed with food.

He's obsessed with food because he's growing, and on the cusp of growing even more quickly, and his body is screaming at him that he needs food to prepare for upcoming growth, but it's being denied to him. He NEEDS carbs for growth and limiting him to one serving is cruel and setting him up for failure.

He's also obsessed with food because he doesn't consistently get his needs met in this area, so he's constantly worried about the next time that's going to happen.

Put healthy food on the table, and allow him to monitor for himself how much he eats. Two pork chops, or three pieces of chicken, and a couple servings of rice or potatoes is a good place to start a meal for a kid at this stage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
OP,

You haven't really told us any relevant facts:
1. BMI? Percentile in height and weight for his age?
2. Does he seem to only think about food?
3. Does he gulp his food or eat very quickly?
4. Does he eat more when stressed, anxious, before a big event?
5. Does he seem to have or has he expressed a loss of control when he starts to eat?

Right now we have no idea whether what you're describing is normal or not.

he thinks about food alot, and yes he eats very quickly and barely chews, especially veggies he just swallows them as if they're poison.

he definitely has no control in front of food, e.g. he'd get really upset if little sister even hinted to want something on his plate.

Control is a skill that you learn through practice.

How often has he had control of his diet? Not for one meal, but on an ongoing basis for months at a time? Stop hovering over his food for a year. Not a day or a week, but a year, and then see where you are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
OP,

You haven't really told us any relevant facts:
1. BMI? Percentile in height and weight for his age?
2. Does he seem to only think about food?
3. Does he gulp his food or eat very quickly?
4. Does he eat more when stressed, anxious, before a big event?
5. Does he seem to have or has he expressed a loss of control when he starts to eat?

Right now we have no idea whether what you're describing is normal or not.

he thinks about food alot, and yes he eats very quickly and barely chews, especially veggies he just swallows them as if they're poison.

he definitely has no control in front of food, e.g. he'd get really upset if little sister even hinted to want something on his plate.

Control is a skill that you learn through practice.

How often has he had control of his diet? Not for one meal, but on an ongoing basis for months at a time? Stop hovering over his food for a year. Not a day or a week, but a year, and then see where you are.

did that for about 9 months, and we're ~20 lbs heavier and not much taller...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also how active is he?

not sure how this is relevant. he's not hnugry from doing a ton of exercise, if that's what you're implying.

what do you mean it's not relevant? And why are you so defensive? You have issues with food and you are projecting it as a 'treat,' which is why he is gorging.

It is absolutely relevant. (NP here.) My very active kids will often eat a full meal after a 3 hour hard practice and then another full meal maybe 3-4 hours later. If you're seeing a large consumption of junkier food at restaurants and eat out several times per week, I'd cut that out even though you may not want to. (Even if you got take out, it limits the ability to snack on bread or chips and salsa if it is take out.) Also, school lunches aren't great. Why not pack those?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, in a typical day what specific foods does he eat & in what quantities?

one glass of milk, one eng, one slice of toast, one babybel, four meatballs/grilled chicken breast strips, one cutie/some grapes.

two school lunches/a dessert (rice putting/yougurt)

one piece of cookie/one energy bar/yougurt (will ask for more).

one chicken breast (will ask for seconds or a thigh)/one (will ask for two) pork chop/a (will ask for more) steak, some brocoli/cauliflower/lettice (never seconds), some bread/rice/pasta (wants seconds), some hot soup. no dessert. small fruit sometimes (never seconds).

one glass of milk.

yeah he eats a lot.

Are you from another country?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
OP,

You haven't really told us any relevant facts:
1. BMI? Percentile in height and weight for his age?
2. Does he seem to only think about food?
3. Does he gulp his food or eat very quickly?
4. Does he eat more when stressed, anxious, before a big event?
5. Does he seem to have or has he expressed a loss of control when he starts to eat?

Right now we have no idea whether what you're describing is normal or not.

he thinks about food alot, and yes he eats very quickly and barely chews, especially veggies he just swallows them as if they're poison.

he definitely has no control in front of food, e.g. he'd get really upset if little sister even hinted to want something on his plate.

Control is a skill that you learn through practice.

How often has he had control of his diet? Not for one meal, but on an ongoing basis for months at a time? Stop hovering over his food for a year. Not a day or a week, but a year, and then see where you are.

did that for about 9 months, and we're ~20 lbs heavier and not much taller...

Which is absolutely normal for a kid this age who is the process of changing from a gangly child physique to an adolescent, and is storing up fat for a growth spurt.

So, your kid does know how to control is, and acts absolutely as he should for his age when you don't control. Why did you stop?

[Anonymous]

He really doesn't eat a lot for an 11 yo IMO.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, in a typical day what specific foods does he eat & in what quantities?

one glass of milk, one eng, one slice of toast, one babybel, four meatballs/grilled chicken breast strips, one cutie/some grapes.

two school lunches/a dessert (rice putting/yougurt)

one piece of cookie/one energy bar/yougurt (will ask for more).

one chicken breast (will ask for seconds or a thigh)/one (will ask for two) pork chop/a (will ask for more) steak, some brocoli/cauliflower/lettice (never seconds), some bread/rice/pasta (wants seconds), some hot soup. no dessert. small fruit sometimes (never seconds).

one glass of milk.

yeah he eats a lot.

Are you from another country?

Yes, so?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Limiting food leads to obsession with it. Bottom line.

i understand that. my question is what else?

This kind of obsessive thinking and probing.

[Anonymous]

Your son (and you) are overeating in reaction to eating the wrong foods - your body is starving. Fill up on proteins and vegetables and cheeses - and stay away from wheat. Wheat makes your body hungry.