When to tell kids about remarriage plans?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are either of your exes remarried, or would you two be the first? That's not a bad thing but it does mean your kids will/won't have had experience with this kind of changed dynamic.

No, neither of them have. All the kids think it's neat that we're dating though. My kids like him and his kid likes me. It helps that they are all pretty young and not like teenagers.

[Anonymous]

You guys and your kids sound well matched then. I still would discourage you from getting married so soon but what about closer to the holidays or next summer?

[Anonymous]

We waited 3 years to marry. That was 2 full years of doing things more or less as families on a regular basis--holidays, vacations. It's wonderful you feel this way, and wonderful your kids get along so far--but after 9 months, you can't judge how it's going to go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nine months is not enough time. Give it another year at the very least.

During that time, have the kids spend lots of time together. Ask your kids what they think.

You do know that your chances of divorce are very high, don't you? 67-80%?

No kidding! Poor kids.

[Anonymous]

No way. Why the rush? I would be worried about the kids. Dating is fine but marriage brings up a whole set of issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nine months is not enough time. Give it another year at the very least.

During that time, have the kids spend lots of time together. Ask your kids what they think.

You do know that your chances of divorce are very high, don't you? 67-80%?

No kidding! Poor kids.

I feel sorry for your kids. I raised my kids to be kind and not judgmental - why not give your kids the same gift?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I remarried a man who brought two kids with him, and I agree nine months is too soon.

I agree, very sad. She is not putting her children first. Why rush?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nine months is not enough time. Give it another year at the very least.

During that time, have the kids spend lots of time together. Ask your kids what they think.

You do know that your chances of divorce are very high, don't you? 67-80%?

No kidding! Poor kids.

I feel sorry for your kids. I raised my kids to be kind and not judgmental - why not give your kids the same gift?

The statistics are what they are. PP is just the messenger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I remarried a man who brought two kids with him, and I agree nine months is too soon.

I agree, very sad. She is not putting her children first. Why rush?

Op said that she had already decided to wait another year. Maybe you should read before expressing your opinion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nine months is not enough time. Give it another year at the very least.

During that time, have the kids spend lots of time together. Ask your kids what they think.

You do know that your chances of divorce are very high, don't you? 67-80%?

No kidding! Poor kids.

I feel sorry for your kids. I raised my kids to be kind and not judgmental - why not give your kids the same gift?

The statistics are what they are. PP is just the messenger.

Your statistics are wrong, closer to 50 percent for first marriages and 60 percent for second marriages. Only a slight difference.

Really the odds are terrible for either. We should eliminate marriage as an institution.

OP, listen to your intuition and do what makes you happy. It doesn't really matter, people will judge you either way.